*insert something gay here*

"'I don't know' isn't an answer" alright man then I'll just. Fuckin. Enter my philosophical mind-palace and check the fuckin akashic records. Real quick lemme just catch and cook and eat the Salmon of All Knowledge. Tell me ur question again so I can real quick climb to the highest branches of the Yggdrasil and lay it at the feet of Freda the all-wise Queen of Heaven. Dickhead.

Shout out to all the Project Hail Mary fanartists who are very aware that Rocky weighs 370lbs and cannot live in our atmosphere and then completely ignore those facts to draw Rocky hugging/snuggling Grace and sleeping on his chest no problem you're doing the Lord's work

A new study finds that Apple has some of the highest employee turnover rates of any tech company. Google "apple turnover" for more information.

this is going around again and the tags are full of people talking about printing it out to put in their breakroom or cubicle or sending it to their coworkers, which fills me with great joy. vast diversity of professions represented also. zoos. labs. summer camps. restaurants. garden centers. libraries. schools. many reports from the brave warriors of assorted retail. a truth universally acknowledged: if there is a sign a customer will not read it <3 and they don't read emails either <3

the worst writing crime you can ever commit in my opinion is watering down the dirty talk because you’re self-conscious that it sounds like it’s from a bad porno…..i cannot stress this enough……leave it alone. the moment you tell yourself he would not fucking say that you’re doomed. people will say almost anything if their dick is hard enough

I HAVE FINALLY FOUND THE PAINT JOB I NEED ON MY CAR.

driving my newly painted car down to my job at the children’s hospital