imagine you're in your early 20s AT MOST and you're pregnant and not by the guy your parents have been prepping you to marry since you were ELEVEN YEARS OLD. imagine you do your best to conceal the pregnancy but you're surrounded by ppl monitoring you p much 24/7, ppl who will notice if you're sick or tired or weepy or no longer having menstrual cycles — and then they do find out and they gossip abt it indiscreetly enough that your mother finds out, and your mother just absolutely fucking loses it. and you confess everything!! you lay it all out and say pls help me i'm so scared!! and your parents respond by sending ppl to arrest (and worse!) the guy you love, and the last thing you hear from that guy is 'hey don't worry i've got this when at some point i return we'll leave the only home you've ever known forever!'
now imagine that for as long as that takes, your parents are pulling out all the stops to coerce you into lying abt your child's parentage and marrying the guy they picked out for you. btw you're 'a disgrace!' and also you're never leaving the house again! and your mother just stops speaking to you, and you have no idea if the men your father sent after the man you love, who is the father of your apparently extremely wanted child, captured him, if this is just your life now.
now imagine the guy DOES show up, and he's ready to go, and your dad says okay choose between him and us, forget all of the screaming and threats of imprisonment and the disgrace thing and how you've ruined your life and our lives, too. don't worry, we changed our minds. you don't have to marry that guy we picked out for you, we'll even help you take care of the baby! it's all good, says your father, bc your mother refuses to be in the room with you.
OR choose the man we failed to arrest, and you get nothing. don't ever come back here. you receive no help. and imagine you STILL think there's hope. you bang on your mother's door until your hands are raw to no avail. and then your father takes your hands and says don't bother, you're not our daughter anymore. and you are still pregnant and terrified.
but the guy you love is out there, and so you leave with absolutely fucking nothing, to the point that he's like do you want to pack, or? and you're like no! you're all i want! my dad's not going to pursue us, it's fine!
and then you go to a completely new country and try to settle in, but you've never done any household chores for yourself, and your neighbors think you sound too educated, and you are in the Beyond Uncomfortable stage of pregnancy, and you're like okay the only lucrative skill i have is needlework, so i'll just do that forever. and you are so fucking lonely and so fucking sad and maybe you feel like you're not even allowed to have those feelings bc you chose this!! and your now husband worked and is working so hard to give you a happy life!!
and your legacy, forever, is to be the ungrateful, selfish child who threw her life away for nothing and broke her parents' hearts. you're literally the Tipping Point for your entire family's ruin. your parents don't want to hear abt any of your children. they do not fucking care. your brother resents you for the rest of your life. you go thru all of that, and you manage to make a home for your children and husband, an imperfect one, sure, a frequently stressful one, but you do your best.
and then when you do return to the home you grew up in, you spend the majority of the last years of your life, unbeknownst to you, mourning your husband and potentially two dead children, certainly two children lost. being called 'lady amell' after your parents told you that you had no right to that name anymore bc they wanted you erased from their lives and history. and the SECOND you decide you might want to be happy for yourself again, you are fucking MURDERED.
janainaart
areudirty
andulkaphoto
kianamaiart
pixelskylines
yousharknotpass
gummygunk
romaincrisis
