Half funny, half fandom

the tragedy of tumblr is you will inevitably meet people who you should be having a sleepover with. you should be rolling around on their floor and rummaging through their fridge and watching shitty movies with. you should be shopping with should be going out to a cafe with should be wandering through the aquarium with. people who you should be experiencing quotidian joys with... and you cannot! because they live one million miles away

mice are having sex in my walls :(

never thought i'd get accused of faking having a mice infestation for tumblr clout and yet here we are

you fucked those mice yourself

I fucked those mice myself

“no matter how badly you think you’re doing it, someone else has done it a lot worse and been fine” is applicable to a wide, wide range of things and i say it to myself all the time

"bigger idiots than me have done it" is a phrase I live by

I fucked up so badly on this sudoku page no ones ever gonna wanna have sex with me

does anyone else feel kind of slutty refilling soap bottles

Ancient scribes detailing horrible events

Ok*reduces you to a simmer* go rest for a while

i am massively overdue for a very very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy

reblog to give prev a very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy

when you show up to the met gala you should immediately be faced with a panel of fashion experts and art historians before you even get to the red carpet and you have to explain your outfit choice and why it is on theme for that year’s event like you are defending a phd and if you can’t produce a coherent defence they turn you away at the door and the people of manhattan are allowed and encouraged to throw rotten produce at you as you get back into your car in shame

"Write character relationships that are normal" WRONG ☝ CODEPENDENCY BEAM 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥