Let me tell you about my cat(s)

M. ABC book. 1923. Illustrated by C.B. Falls.

milkman

ice cutter

switchboard operator

elevator operator

soda jerk

wandering farm foreman

Liking a specific sandwich does not gender you in any meaningful way. Loudly rejecting a sandwich because it would portray you as too effeminate or masculine, or demanding a sandwich as a way of asserting your gender identity -- that is the what I'm discussing, not the sandwich itself. A man eating a veggie wrap doesn't impact my data because that's actually very normal; men performatively rejecting a veggie wrap as too feminine is what the post is about.

It manifests in our lives all the time and it is inherently destructive. It makes relationships and interactions adversarial for no good reason. It undermines cooperation and good civic order. It worsens some types of crime. It creates trauma, especially in children.

Imagine approaching unexpected or unacceptable behavior from a perspective of "how can this be stopped, and prevented" instead of "you’re going to regret this!”

Imagine dealing with a problem or conflict from the perspective of “how can this be solved in a way that is just and restorative” instead of “the people who caused this are going to pay.”