Daichi Dominator🌚!

Disney World’s supposed to make you happy, right? Eren couldn’t get the thought out of his head as he pressed his wet back against the shaded brick wall behind him. His parents and younger brother were off in a line for something Eren had no interest in riding—so essentially, they could have been anywhere.

He hadn’t tried to lose them, but he didn’t mind, either. The humidity was driving him mad, minute by minute. He missed the air conditioning back at the house, and more than that, he missed the dry heat in Arizona. Ever since they’d moved, he’d felt like he was always mildly drowning; either on the air, or his own sweat.

“Water?” a kind voice asked.

Eren straightened, his head whipping to find the source. To his left, a familiar head of blonde hair clumped together in small chunks over a glistening forehead. Blue eyes, and a shy smile.

Armin lifted the bottle he offered, but Eren couldn’t move.

“I saw you standing here on my way to get a drink, and you looked like you could use some, so…” Armin explained. His brows crept together when an answer still didn’t come. “Are you okay?”

Eren forced himself to move, stiff like his joints had rusted in the damp heat. He wrapped his fingers around the bottle, and nodded.

“Thank you.”

Armin smiled. “Are you here with anyone?”

“Uh…”

“You can join us!”

Eren wondered if he was hallucinating. Had the sun gotten the best of him?

“Mikasa!”

His heart skipped a beat. No, this wasn’t real. And if it was, he couldn’t handle it. Not now. Maybe not ever.

With Armin’s back turned to him, he slipped around the corner of the building and took off as fast as he could push his shaking legs.

~*~

By the time junior year started, Eren was still thinking about them. Nearly two months had passed, and as many nights were filled with their faces in his dreams. 

It was no wonder his peers avoided him in the halls. The purple under his eyes, and his default dead stare were the perfect shield. But, the less people bothered him, the better. He was far too tired to deal with the endless interviews that came with being the new kid.

The peace didn’t last long, though.

Two weeks into the semester, Eren was making his way down the stairs from his last class when he heard that voice again.

“Take whatever you need. I’m happy to do some charity work.”

Eren was certain he was hallucinating now, but he couldn’t help slowing his strides.

“Little fuck—” Thud .

Armin groaned.

Eren’s legs moved faster than his brain, pulling him down the last flight of stairs into the basement. Armin sat in the corner, crumpled up against the wall, with two senior jocks towering over him and a sophomore bitch digging through his backpack.

“Get the fuck away from him,” Eren growled, pulling his bag off of his shoulders. “ Now. ”

Laughter echoed in the small landing, but he wasn’t amused. He swung his bag, heavy with his old, bulky laptop and three cans of Monster Energy. The first guy went down, taken off guard, but the second grabbed the bag and tugged so hard that Eren fell to his knees.

Before he could process the change in perspective, the second guy dropped like a fly, and the sophomore took off up the stairs.

“Armin, are you hurt?”

Eren’s chest tightened, squeezing the breath out of him.

Mikasa .

“I’m fine.”

Eren stared at the floor, listening to the shuffling as they moved. It dawned on him that he was trapped. If not in the stairwell, then in the building. If not today, then for the next two years. 

He’d never wanted to be hallucinating so badly in his life. Well, in this one, anyway.

“You’re the new kid,” Mikasa said somewhere behind him.

He nodded, not daring to look at her.

“And the Disney World guy!” Armin exclaimed. “It is a small world after all.”

“Yeah,” Eren agreed quietly.

“Thanks for your help,” Armin said. “We’re going to get ice cream, if you want to come?”

Eren pushed himself up, refusing to show his face. He picked up his backpack, and threw it over his shoulder. Without a word, he hurried up the stairs.

Behind him, Mikasa said, “What a dick.”

Surprisingly, even to himself, Eren huffed a single laugh as he pushed through the exit.

~*~

It started one day in the library, when Eren stayed late after class to avoid going home. One eleven year old brother he could handle, but when said brother’s friends were over? No thank you.

He’d been flipping through a comic book, music playing in his headphones, when he felt eyes on him. Then again the next day on the bus as he stared out the window. And again on Monday in the cafeteria.

He ignored it. At some point, someone had dubbed him freak boy . Now, they were all waiting for him to do something, anything that would make good gossip. Anything that could fuel their flames.

It felt so trivial to Eren.

What’s new?

He felt it wherever we went, so he didn’t think about who else might be watching him in the crowd. Until they changed their strategy.

“We’re going to be friends,” Armin announced as he sat down at the mostly-empty lunch table.

Eren looked up, lips parting with nothing to say.

Mikasa slid in beside Armin, eyes narrowed with  skepticism as she observed Eren across the table.

“I’m Armin. This is Mikasa,” Armin said.

“And you’re freak boy ,” Mikasa added.

Eren pressed his lips together and pushed his lunch around the plate in front of him. This was so incredibly cruel. Since the day he first remembered , he’d wondered: why ? Now it seemed the answer was torture.

Selfishly, he wanted his friends back. Unfortunately, he knew he didn’t deserve that. He’d hurt them in ways he couldn’t comprehend in this new life. How unfair it would be to take advantage of their blissful ignorance.

“Yup, that’s me,” Eren agreed. “Big freak. Generally awful human being. And I’m allergic to friendship, so you should go.”

“I hear some allergies go away with exposure therapy,” Armin said with a small smile.

“No, I’m deathly allergic.”

Armin’s lips fell. “W-well, if you change your mind… We’re going to see Colossus on Friday night. I have a third ticket. Very minimal talking.”

Eren kept his eyes on his plate. There was no way he could finish eating now. He wasn’t sure he would be able to keep anything down.

“Let’s go,” Mikasa mumbled..

And they were gone.

~*~

Maybe Eren was a masochist, no matter what life he lived. He could barely reason with himself as to why he was standing outside of the theater downtown. He knew that any time spent in their presence was sure to end painfully. Yet, here he was.

“You came!” Armin cheered as he got out of the passenger seat of the old car Mikasa drove them over in. He hurried across the parking lot to meet Eren by the wall covered in framed posters. Mikasa followed, less eager.

Eren’s eyes scanned over her, latching on to the details: her pigtails, dark lipstick, layers of necklaces, and long flowing skirt. He nearly stopped breathing. It was so different, but… nice.

Her eyes hardened. He averted his gaze.

“Uh, yeah. I love these movies,” Eren said, though he avoided Armin’s face, as well.

“Us, too,” Armin chirped, guiding them into the building.

Loaded with popcorn and drinks, they shuffled into their seats. Eren found himself in the middle, to Mikasa’s distaste. Armin refused to acknowledge it.

As promised, no one spoke as the film rolled on the screen. Armin mindlessly shovelled popcorn into his mouth while Eren and Mikasa sat in mild discomfort beside each other. Eren tried his best to focus on the movie, but he didn’t know what he’d expected to happen. All he could think about was how sweet Mikasa’s perfume smelled, how her eyes sparkled in the dark. 

What he’d put her through.

In the end, he left without knowing a single name or plot point.

“That was amazing!” Armin said with a grin. “Oh my god, that plot twist! I’m going straight to the forums when I get home.”

Eren almost smiled. He couldn’t deny it was nice to see him so happy, at peace. Safe.

That is, until he stepped off of the curb without looking. Eren shot forward, yanking him back before the speeding car could get to him. The high beams flashed over their faces as they stumbled onto the grass. Mikasa gasped as she caught up behind them, then pushed Eren aside to make sure her best friend was okay. Once confident, she looked back over her shoulder.

“You saved him.”

“Again,” Armin breathed.

Eren shrugged. The last thing he wanted was for it to be a big deal.

It was.

Armin and Mikasa refused to leave him alone from that evening on.

~*~

It was a summer afternoon, a few weeks before senior year, that Eren noticed something different in the way Mikasa looked at him. 

They were lounging in Armin’s basement, each of them doing something different. Armin was reading on the floor, Mikasa had nail polish bottles sprawled across the coffee table, and Eren lounged on the couch with his headphones on as he lost himself in thought. They’d grown comfortable as a trio, naturally, as was their fate, it seemed.

Things weren’t quite the same, Eren found. At a core level, he recognized the people in front of him, but they’d been shaped by a different world. He supposed the same was true of himself. Yet, they still worked together. 

He found that it was easier to make them happy than to dwell on lives they were blind to. And if it filled some of the gaping crater in his chest, he didn’t mind.

Armin slid a bookmark into his paperback and pushed himself up to go to the bathroom. The movement caught Eren’s attention, and he turned his head to catch the tail end of his retreat. Mikasa looked up from the table, and they found each other’s eyes. Neither spoke for a moment, Mikasa blowing on her wet nails. Eren slid his headphones down around his neck.

“What are you listening to?” she asked.

“The new HISTORIA album.”

Her brows lifted. “You like HISTORIA?”

“Yeah, they’re a solid band.”

“I loved their last album.”

“Really?”

“Mhm.”

“What about this one?”

“I haven’t heard it yet.”

Eren fiddled with the cord on his headphones. “Well… Listen to it. If you like it, I’ll get us tickets for their show in Orlando.”

“Tickets for who?” Armin asked as he re-entered the room.

“HISTORIA,” Mikasa answered.

Armin’s nose scrunched. “Not my favourite.”

“Just us then,” Eren said with a crooked smile..

Mikasa’s eyes danced with something that made Eren’s chest flutter.

~*~

The concert turned into late night dinner, which bled into a stroll along the beach until the sun came up. Eren couldn’t remember the last time he’d had so much fun. He couldn’t remember if he’d ever seen Mikasa so happy. It suited her, he thought.

Which was how it began. An old story on a new page.

Armin settled into his third-wheel role with zero complaints. And when Eren called him out for listening to HISTORIA on the bus one day, he smiled innocently.

Things were good. So good. Wonderful, even. For the first time in the two thousand years these feelings had existed, Eren was allowed to feel them. Openly, honestly. Deeply. He was allowed to bask in her affection, to melt into her and tell her what she really meant to him. If he shed a tear, he told her the air was dry.

Years passed them by, and Eren almost forgot about their failed first love. He’d nearly tricked himself into writing it all off as silly dreams, again. Maybe he could have deluded himself into believing that for real. Maybe.

Except he should have known better.

One night, just shy of three in the morning, Mikasa shot up in bed, covered in sweat. Eren stirred, squinting into the dark to try and find her silhouette.

“What’s wrong?” he whispered.

She shook, and his heart sank as he laid his hand on her trembling arm. In an instant, he wrapped himself around her from behind, holding her close. She sniffled, but didn’t say anything. With his soft, soothing whispers, she calmed enough to lay down, to fall asleep in his arms again. Eren stared at the ceiling for the rest of the night.

When he brought it up in the morning, she simply said, “I don’t really remember. It was just scary.”

Eren prayed to whatever higher power existed these days. Let her be.

But, the only deity who favoured him was gone.

Mikasa woke up in a panic more often over the months, and Eren cursed the universe for hurting her again. Especially when he was so powerless to fix it, stuck watching her stare off into the distance as whatever visions she saw plagued her in the daytime.

“Is it crazy if I think my dreams might be… real?” she asked one day over dinner, breaking the silence.

Eren paused, then swallowed his half-chewed mouthful of food. “What do you mean?”

“Like…” Her eyes glossed over again. “Nevermind.”

“Tell me. I’m not judging you.”

She took a breath and collected herself. “I keep having these dreams… about this whole other… life. It just feels… too real.”

Eren’s heart pounded in his chest, but he focused on stabbing chicken and lettuce. “Maybe it is? Or maybe this is your call to write a best selling novel.”

Mikasa stared down at her plate. “You’re in them. Armin too.”

“Well, the human brain can’t make new people. So maybe we’re your stand-ins?”

She peeked up at him, and it took all of his willpower to meet her stare. He smiled, and her lips curved weakly.

“Yeah, maybe you’re right.”

He wasn’t, but she would be better not knowing the truth. She deserved peace.

~*~

Months later, Eren woke up alone. When he reached out to Mikasa’s side of the bed, it was cold. She was nowhere in the apartment. No note, no text. Her location sharing had been turned off hours ago. Eren jumped immediately to the worst case scenario.

She didn’t pick up the phone. She didn’t respond to his texts. He had no clue where she’d gone. He could only hope she’d show up for their movie night with Armin that evening.

To his relief, she did. Though it was soon replaced with unease. By the time they settled into their seats—Armin in the middle—she still hadn’t looked at him.

Armin leaned over and whispered, “What did you do?” 

Eren shrugged, but his best friend simply wasn’t buying it. Especially not when Mikasa had still barely acknowledged Eren’s presence by the time they were seated in a booth for dinner after the movie. 

“C’mon, Mikasa. I know Eren’s a bit of an idiot sometimes, but he loves you,” Armin pleaded.

Eren couldn’t argue.

Mikasa took a sip of her drink.

“Tell me what he did. He makes some bad decisions sometimes, but he usually has a reason.”

It was then that she looked at Eren, directly in the eyes. She didn’t say a word, but he could see it on her face. He knew exactly what she was thinking. His blood turned to ice.

“Something stupid,” he said, catching the twitch of her brows. “I’ll make it up to her.”

Armin nodded. “That’s the spirit.”

Eren kept his eyes on the girl across the table, though she continued avoiding him. To his discomfort, she did so quite successfully, until Armin left for the night, and they stood silently in the parking lot by Eren’s car. 

The sun had set not too long ago, but he wasn’t quite ready to go home. Still, he opened the door for her, eyes soft and pleading. She caved far easier than he expected.

When they pulled up to the beach, her brows knit tightly together. She studied the man in the driver’s seat, uncertain. He reached into the back seat to grab her a light sweater, then started out into the sand and towards the water. A few minutes passed before she joined him by the gentle waves crashing on the shore. 

“How’s your book coming along?” he asked.

She pulled the sweater tighter around her. “I still haven’t decided on the genre. Not sure about fiction.”

Eren stared into the distance, watching the twinkling lights from boats out on the horizon. She took another step toward the water, breeze blowing her hair behind her, and his eyes flickered to her frame.

“I’m so confused.” she whispered.

Eren’s heart broke for her. He might have been the only one to understand this unique strain of grief, and yet he hadn’t given her a space to process it. He should have known she’d want to face the music.

“I’m sorry.” His voice cracked, and she turned to look at him with wide eyes. His defenses were down, now. The pain, raw and blistering, was hers to know if she wished it.

Her lip trembled. “Is it real?”

He closed his eyes as they prickled with tears, then nodded. He managed a shaky breath, but promptly stopped breathing altogether when trembling fingers grazed his neck.

“Am I going to wake up there again?”

A sob broke in Eren’s throat, his arms winding tight around her like she might disappear any moment, his head shaking. He’d given her ignorance before, and it had only twisted the knife.

“No.”

Her tears flowed, thick and abundant as she pressed her face into his chest. Her hands clawed at his shirt, his skin, his hair. He squeezed her tight, kissing the top of her head. She shook, legs unable to hold her weight any longer. Eren slowly lowered them to their knees and brushed the hair out of her wet face.

“You’re… Oh my god, Eren…” she sobbed.

He smiled, sad and afraid. “Do you hate me?”

She sniffled, choked on a harsh sob, and then pressed herself as close to him as she possibly could, not a care in the world if her boots were filling with sand.

“Never,” she said through her shoulder-shaking tears. “You’re here, Eren. It’s a fresh start, Eren. We have a life together, Eren. You’re twenty-six, Eren.”

A fond laugh almost bubbled to the surface, but he was too busy trying to kiss her senseless, tasting the salt of their tears against their lips.

The world, beautiful and cruel, had brought them together again. 

He would let nothing ruin it this time.

Not even fate.

~*~

... He warms up to you quickly, though. When you try not to look intimidating or aggressive, almost cooing over him, making him feel both awkwardly embarrassing and grateful — it's enough for him to greet you with raised ears and a happy smile, even if you go to train him. Gullibility is not the best quality for prey, but you purr that you will take care of him in every sense while combing his hair (as pack animals do, right?), and Yuuta really wants to believe you, especially when you rub him behind the ear, making his leg tremble.

He's just so cute, even if he looks up to you morally, not physically, being tall enough for ordinary prey, especially his kind. It's not that you were against it — Yuuta somehow develops behind you in a trusting gesture, shyly waiting for your words and actions, as if he can't make any wolf look up. And such timid trustfulness and entrusting what was happening to you was even pleasant, especially when his fingers were clinging to your clothes so as not to lose sight of you, or accepting you as a dominant rabbit and part of the pack, or when Yuuta slightly chatters his teeth, snuggling up to you to show that he feels happy.

... The first moment when he falls asleep next to you with his eyes closed? Absolutely precious. The feeling that he completely trusts you when he presses closer to your side, expecting that you will keep him company and also fall asleep next to him (or on him) makes you feel sleepy, especially when he wraps his arms around your hips or stomach, nuzzling you.

Precious.

Rabbits are very possessive creatures, you know? They don't let outsiders into their territory (or anyone if they are very possessive), they don't like someone else's smell, they don't really like to share and easily attack and growl when upset. Yuuta is not very different in many ways — after all, he is also a rabbit, and although he knows that this is bad and wrong, he cannot help but be possessive, even knowing and trying to work on these traits.

When you smell unfamiliar, Yuuta can't help but rub against you, trying to suppress the irritating smell by carefully wiping your skin with himself. Or when you are apart and his pack instincts become too sensitive, demanding that he find you and snuggle up to your side, as he has been away from the pack for too long. What's going on with you? Where are you? Why is he alone? Are you okay? Who are you with? Why aren't you with him? You're his, aren't you? You're part of the same pack. It's natural that you should be together. You have to be together.

He must not leave you.

... When you write to him or call him, it becomes a little easier — it doesn't matter if it's your text, face or voice, anything makes him feel less abandoned, helping to take a deep breath at least once with the thought that you are fine and experiencing a temporary separation normally. If you're coping well with separation, then it's not that serious — he's just too restless, right? There's nothing so bad about members of the same pack sometimes spending a little more time apart than they need to. Everyone sometimes needs a little time without the other.

Or maybe... maybe you like it when he's away from you?

After all, you could just get tired of him, right?

(short messages about what he can bring you as a gift to make you feel better actually help him relax.)

You quickly get used to the fact that your personal space is now somewhere near him, especially next to his arms, tightly wrapped around your body. Rabbits often snuggle up to each other in search of protection and warmth, being very social creatures — and although you probably could not boast of the same species features, Yuuta can do nothing, constantly hiding his face in your neck or shoulder and crawling under your side, hugging and cuddling tightly, looking for a soothing smell.

Not as annoying as you might feel at first (especially if you're not a gregarious hybrid), and although you don't know if it's a particularly soft nest, or his soothing heartbeat, or because it's Yuuta, but later you start to feel it as a pleasant and satisfying activity, getting used to the fact that now you are not walking alone, but with the mate snuggled up.

At least he's not too cold and not too warm, and his ears are even a little funny, — especially when they twitch in their sleep or when you blow on them, — and the way he tries to get under you is still cute.

It's not typical for Yuuta to be warm — you'd rather feel how cold his hands and nose are than admire their heat, even if it's typical for tiny prey to be as hot as an oven. A fast metabolism with a lot of burning of various calories — although this is definitely his case, Yuuta continues to persistently stay cool, except for those moments when his face and ears burn with shyness.

A pleasant, affectionate warmth, that spreading over his always cold body, you can feel only a couple of days before his estrus.

Yuuta becomes much more sleepy and restless, being able to sleep for more than twelve hours, waking up only because of your attempts to get out, perceiving it as a signal to protect from something, — and you end up spending an almost obscene amount of time surrounded by blankets and pillows, holding him in your hands while Yuuta coos and purrs in sleep, holding you tightly in case of another attempt to escape from him. His reactions in a dream next to you to any stimuli are minimal — it doesn't matter if you squeeze him, grope his body or bite his neck, Yuuta only whines sometimes, pressing even harder against your hands and body, allowing you to do what you want if you don't leave him.

... By the time he wakes up, he's usually covered in bites and hickeys because he looked so shamelessly defenseless and warm in front of you, that you couldn't give up your natural need. It's not your fault that Yuuta keeps you so close, baring his neck and skin, even knowing that there is a bored predator next to him, unable to even budge at their will, and seduced by him. He was even lucky that it ended only so innocently, because you could have gone further, — although, looking at his face, on which there is no hint of displeasure or discomfort, despite his body painted in your marks, you cannot be sure whether this was not his original desire.

Perhaps Yuuta wanted you to take good care of him from the very beginning.

Yuuta whines so sweetly, almost begging you not according to the script, especially when you catch him with your claws, ignoring his attempts to scratch you or push you away, forcing his hips to cling tightly to each other — only to be forcibly pushed apart by you and covered in bites when you reach lower, making him tremble (with delight? from awe? from fear?)

He may have more cursed energy, but in a physical struggle you will win; squeezing hips until bruises and biting shoulders until his moaning stops, replaced by intermittent sighs from lack of air and fatigue that you will make him make, ignoring whining and pleas 'not to eat him'.

Of course you are not going to eat him — just bite a little until he becomes a good prey and stops trying to get out of your clutches, and when Yuuta twitches again, trying to get out, you force him to stay in place — as befits a good bunny, which he should be. Only good bunnies get rewarded, or you're going to eat him... although you absolutely cannot ignore how wet he gets — this is not at all the reaction of a good rabbit who whines that he wants to get out while his thighs can't stop shaking with excitement. No wonder he can't even run away from you with such shaking legs — it's hard to run when he only wants to breed until he loses consciousness, and then continue, being so sensitive that one squeeze is enough for him to start clinging instead of trying to scratch.

When his ears stretch back, and wet, shiny eyes follow your every move, when your hands scratch his stomach, leaving red bruises, and Yuuta forcefully restrains a painful moan, feeling you stroke between his thighs, making him feel so painfully excited and excited because of the pain — and whining uncontrollably when you growl, causing him to almost choke with surprise and uncontrollably tremble even more, squeezing you with his strong legs.

Even when your hand reaches out to press him down and grab his neck, Yuuta only enthusiastically grabs it, wrapping his leg even more tightly around your thigh, and you can't help but wonder which of you is really the prey while he rubs against your thigh, obsessively kissing your hand and rubbing his cheek against it.

A naughty, tiny rabbit who only wants you to take good care of him.

You could actually work with this.

ৎ୭  Yuuta blushes delightfully when you first ask permission to capture him on camera, looking at his charmingly happy face, — and lets you, saying that you can do anything that will make you feel good. The photo of a shyly smiling, nervously excited Yuuta looking straight into the lens becomes the first in your album — when he was wearing a white jacket, Rika was a cursed spirit, not his ability, and he timidly stretched out his fingers to yours when you were sitting next to him, wanting to touch you as he likes to do. His hands were always reaching out to you — to grab the edge of your clothes, try to entwine your elbow, to press against your side when you let him, to be as close as possible when you won by knocking him to the ground.

  The next photo, where Yuuta, breathing heavily, allows you to press on his stomach with your knee, obediently spreading his hips in a more than intimate pose for your convenience, seems a little hasty, given your purely friendly relations, but when Yuuta whines, blushing even more, you only tease that this will be an incentive for him even more train harder.

(maybe knowing how many times he came, just remembering this loss and the photo, you would think about whether you want to take this photo — or that you want to make shooting a tradition.)

  The third — and final — photo you take when he falls asleep on you, finding a comfortable place on your lap. A movie night in which there is no place for him except your hips — “there’s nothing special about sitting on a friend’s lap,” and Yuuta, being quite socially awkward, touch starved and comfortable with your presence, allows you to pull him by the small waist. And although you would not be able to call yourself very soft and pleasant to sleep on, his measured breathing begins to tickle your neck much earlier than you could expect; lulled by your heartbeat and noise from the screen, Yuuta falls asleep before everyone else, blissfully snuggling up to you in search of warmth — and being absolutely not against you doing a couple of photos of his peaceful face.

  His eyelashes flutter sweetly in his sleep when he presses whole body against you, although for some reason you do not doubt that it is useless to try to get out.

  … He looks pretty good himself, though...

ৎ୭ ... Maybe he looks too good for his own good.

  Yuuta is not the kind of guy who likes to undress or show himself, but when he lets you see more skin, metaphorically exposing his ankle in a bashful blush just for your look, wanting to attract your attention — you don’t need others to point out that his platonic friendliness becomes a puppy in love. Even when the Panda teases that the newbie does not stop talking about you and does not take longing looks from you (which, as Yuuta believes, no one notices), you brush it off. It’s not that you don’t appreciate advice or comments, — even Toge can’t remain indifferent, bringing to you quite certain thoughts that you definitely aren’t going to discuss out loud, in response only hearing his mischievous giggle, — you just… you’re not sure. You are not sure to the last.

(when Maki clicks his tongue disapprovingly, you skillfully find an excuse to increase the distance, knowing the tactics of “I don’t care about what happens between you and how you treat him but…”)

  Even when it becomes obvious that the tension becomes indecently strong and unexpressed and begins to affect not only the two of you, but also the whole team, forcing them to observe your mutual masochistic attempts to practice «take care of me» and «catch me», where Yuuta plays the role of a naive desperate puppy poking into your palm and almost whining from the desire to get more attention, and you pretend as if nothing is happening, even when he grows to your hip, from a pet always following you around, becoming your tail. You’re not sure, you’re not sure about so many things, that when you have to watch him, desperately trying to convince you to stay a little longer, you don’t see any reason to refuse — and it’s an unhealthy practice, but if you were 'healthy’, it wouldn’t even begin. Your camera is gathering dust, although the album is getting bigger — Yuuta likes to stuff his cheeks like a hamster, prefers to rest on your lap and hands and lets you use him as you want for your collection, allowing you to bare him more than usual to capture this look or just to touch him. But no matter what you do, it seems wrong, and all these photos are not something you should be proud of, as if you should not be doing this right now, but finish things, sort things out, solve all things — and come to the most correct decision.

  And you do.

  … Panda reassuringly pats you on the shoulder, saying that this is not the last chance in your life, some things just don’t add up, it’s even right that you didn’t make what is happening even more serious — “the main thing is that you remained friends,” and you undoubtedly are. You won’t be able to be 'lovers’.

  To satisfy this thirst, you need something deeper.

  ৎ୭ Yuuta blushes when you kiss his fingers, — one by one, pressing lips firmly to each, — and does not even flinch when hears the click, closing his eyes from the pleasure of touching. His bags under eyes don’t look as bad as you thought the first time — and when you reach for another kiss, Yuuta gently wraps his arm around your body to immediately squeeze tightly. He tastes a lot better than you expected, too. And his leg, thrown over your hip in a protective gesture, feels nice, even when he tries to turn you over on back to lie on top.

  You are not quite sure what you should do, knowing that he expects nothing from you, being more than satisfied with this closeness and cursory touches to his skin, but you try anyway.

“I'm… I’m quite… possessive… but I’ll be working on it! Every day I try to be better than I already am, and I will work to ensure that you always feel comfortable and cozy next to me– I will be the best version of myself next to you! Just… just promise me you won’t leave me, okay?”

“I don’t want to not be with you– I don’t want to be without you.”

  When Yuuta grabs you, snuggling even closer, trying to wrap himself around you as tightly as possible, as if in fear that you will get up and leave, you just stroke his head like your pet — and this makes him quiet for a while, enjoying your touch, restoring his lost breath.

  His heart is beating so hard that you’re not sure how normal it is.

“I think– I think I love you.”

  Yuuta’s long fingers squeeze so tightly when he looks at you with big doe eyes, as if waiting for a verdict on his life and death, and you want to say something, but you don’t know what, being not even sure how he got into your room at such a late hour — but this is the last, what should you care about, — and not understanding what you could say at all in this situation. Did you want to be with him forever? Did you love him? Do you think of him as a friend? Is he nothing more than a disciple to you?

  Would you rather never even get to know him?

  Maybe if you had never even seen him, never taken responsibility for him, grade promised to make a real special class out of him, you would never have experienced this. Maybe if you, instead of forcing him to talk «about us», would have let everything go its course, this conversation would not have happened. Maybe. These thoughts don’t make sense right now.

“… Will you pose for me? On such moonless nights, beautiful photos are obtained.”

“Of course!”

ৎ୭ Yuuta is like a cute puppy who loves to spin around at your feet to attract attention and lie on your bed, because it’s hard for him to fall asleep and because he’s very bored alone.

  When Maki says that Yuuta is trying too hard to pull you away from strangers, you assure that he is just very protective — doesn’t he do the same with her during dangers?

(you ignore the words that he always does this to you.)

  He’s just restless and nervous, preferring to stand behind your back and seek protection from you — it’s cute. Maybe sometimes it’s unnecessary, but it’s not something they should worry about (even when the usually calm Toge nervously tries to convey something to you, and you are sure that this is not another prank) — Yuuta has nothing bad on his mind, he tries to be helpful and nice, he’s just afraid, it’s hard for him to express himself correctly…

… and you don’t know how you manage to convince others of this.

  The number of photos has long passed over a thousand, starting from his sparkling eyes when looking at snowflakes, his contented smile from eating a warm bun, his rosy cheeks from a long workout, his thoughtful gaze out the window, his searching for figures from clouds in the sky, his nervous grip of a katana in hand, his cute face while sleeping in the your bed — and ending with his tight hugging to your chest, dozing on your lap, wrapping around your blanket, loving glances at you when you «don’t notice» it, gently stroking the keyring during moments of thoughtfulness (the second part of which is stored with you) and a frightened look when he loses sight of you in the crowd.

  It would take you more than a few hours to review each of them.

(Maybe you couldn’t share all of his traits, but you definitely understood some of them.)

ৎ୭ Yuuta does not get easier with time; rather, he refuses to try to be hiding and quiet, ceasing to hide his sides and thoughts, like straightforward words that he is ready to stab anyone who will look at you, no longer trying to be «empathic and more reasonable» when it comes to you in large part because of your apparent indulgence in expressing his desires and feelings — being a little more selfish and attention-hungry was becoming to him. Not expecting anything good from the world does not make the situation safer (as well as him) — but you do not push him away when he presses against you again, sticking to your hip, taking your hand with his trembling, restoring energy after the mission and scaring away all unwanted persons from you. Even if Yuuta has become taller and bigger, he still fits perfectly on your lap, like a little pet puppy wrapping his arms around your neck in a blind desire for intimacy and protection, although now he can protect himself from anyone.

  Some habits never disappear.

  However, now Yuuta asks you to capture him on camera or asks if you want to take a picture, and if he is away from you, then you know that you can count on a large number of his photos, because you are the only incentive for him to take pictures of himself. Daily video communication and photo sharing becomes part of the routine if you can’t spend time with each other physically, although Yuuta is clearly much more dependent on these rituals of keeping in touch, looking forward to the set time to spend some time with you, and constantly checking the phone waiting for your answer.

  … So there is nothing surprising when he does not come out for a week, locked up with you in a common little world. Just a little space alone, without others, only he and you — sorcerers are paid enough so that you can afford such moments whenever you reconnect after (any) separation. In the end, even if he became the 'second anomaly of modernity’ and acquired this dead-fish look, he remained the same moé — nervous, sweet-hearted and loving to sit on your lap, allowing you to take more and more pictures of his charming face.

  Yuuta’s hands tremble when he undresses you, touching bare, warm skin with sweaty palms, licking lips whenever he feels the movement of your chest under his hand, fidgeting uncertainly on your hips to arouse, but rather — feeling very stupid and pathetic and completely unsexy. You probably felt the same way, — Yuuta doesn’t have the courage to look at your definitely disappointed face, — but even when he tries to move more actively, caressing you, it feels unsatisfactory. You breathe softly, as if afraid to scare him off; Yuuta tries to convince himself that you are thinking about him, and have not closed your eyes at all and hope to endure these awkward foreplay and probably not-so-pleasant friction, — but such thoughts do not stay in his head so willingly, giving way to uncertainty and anxiety, even when your hands soothingly stroke his thighs.

  Does he, does he even look sexually arousing? Do you like the pose? Or would you rather undress him while he’s lying quietly? He didn’t want to look indifferent, but what if that’s what you prefer? Shouldn’t he have clarified that earlier? Are you at all comfortable being undressed, or do you prefer to be dressed? Is everything going well? Should he stop and ask all this, or will it spoil the mood?

Or is there nothing left to spoil after all he’s done?

“…Yuuta.”

“O– oh!.. Yes? Is, is something wrong? Are you uncomfortable? Should I move over? Would you prefer otherwi–”

  Click.

“You look cute when you’re worried… But you don’t have to worry so much.”

We can always try again.

  ... Yuuta is hot, like an oven, which contrasts with his usual cold skin — but for some reason you feel the heat not only from his body. This is supposed to be his first time, right?

When he timidly climbs on top of you, squeezing his hips to give you more pleasure, looking with big puppy eyes, looking for your approval and desire, for some reason you just want more — and the only thing he can do is give you even more.

ৎ୭ Yuuta can’t stop blushing and breathing every other time during the «first time», even if it’s already your twentieth «first time» — he still can’t stop timidly stroking your shoulders during kisses, and looking with huge puppy eyes, as if he’s about to cry from an overabundance of feelings, causing you want to hug him and comfort him; but when you stroke his hair while he takes your cock deep, stretching his hot throat until he buries nose in your pubic hair, looking at you with wet shiny eyes from the bottom up, faithfully waiting for your reaction — you can’t say that it’s not hot.

  Yuuta has a weak gag reflex; you know that no matter how deep you force him to take, he will do it without difficulty or complaint, but the thought that he keeps going, even when it is difficult for him, blindly entrusting himself to the fanatical idea of pleasing you to the detriment of himself — when you fill his mouth, Yuuta almost he purrs, not taking his adoring eyes off you until his throat is empty, moving away only to show you that he swallowed everything. The subsequent licking is more of a reward for him than for you, in fact.

  Because your reward is stored by the thousands in an album full of Yuuta taking you anywhere at the first request, kneeling down and nervously taking off the interfering clothes, or gently kissing the head before starting, or starting to take while you hold hand on his hair, encouraging him to continue — or encouraging him with «what a good pet he is» when Yuuta opens his mouth, full of cum, posing for the camera.

  “If I need to relieve stress when you’re not around” — Yuuta doesn’t really need an explanation of your actions, but nods, letting you know that he understands everything and accepts everything, although the mention of a possible temporary separation unpleasantly cuts the heart. When you push your finger into his mouth, gently opening it, encouraging him to take into mouth, saying that before «separation» you take care of him and his cute mouth, so eager to be occupied and filled with you, if his oral fixation is so strong, Yuuta only sucks your finger, murmuring inarticulately satisfied in response, being too focused.

(And a clear approval when you ask him for a little show, even knowing that Yuuta can easily swallow everything you give him and prefer to take you inside. Cum play may not be something that fascinates him, but he can’t give up posing for you, no matter how — the role of the model turns him on quite a lot, especially when he thinks about how you will use these photos.)

ৎ୭ On the other hand, stretching him in an attempt to take your dick is much more difficult — even if Yuuta can easily make you fill his throat with almost one movement, enjoying your reaction without discomfort for himself, he is not a size king at all, and the first times you need a lot of effort to go further, making him almost suffocate when you pump him up. Not that he was ready even then to stop and give up, firmly clasping your hips with his legs and trying to relax, whining from need, kissing your face and neck to calm and cheer while you push deeper.

  If you are not a big size, everything goes easier, — although his stomach still bulges every time he takes your cock, making him drool from stimulation and awareness of his position in front of you, almost cumming when you capture what is happening on camera, leaving evidence of how desperately lustful he can be, taking something so huge because of his sexual preoccupation, — since Yuuta is naturally much better at handling non-big ones and is better at training, over time not needing such a huge amount of lubrication and patience to get inside. And although the subsequent availability makes him much more eager to straddle you or be pressed down (or squeezed into a mating press), you are not so you can complain, knowing that it was you who made him so sexually addicted to it.

  If you are more on the big side, then Yuuta needs time — a lot. It’s not surprising when you move on to CNC and when he doesn’t become even more masochistic than Yuuta already is, enjoying the painful sensations and playing that you force him accept you regardless of his desire, fucking him even when his body going crazy, too overexcited and overwhelmed to react; when his stomach stretches, safely adjusting to your dick, but his muscles squeeze tightly — only to become much more pliable when you dissatisfied spank him, just to understand that he is excited by this. By the time he can fully take your dick for the first time, you, to your disappointment or satisfaction, leave a lot of marks, bites and bruises on his body, making him tremble excitedly when you hover over him, casually preparing for new thrusts, forcing him to whine from the already familiar fullness — to realize with amazement that Yuuta is completely took you; squeezing tightly, begging you to be gentle with him and not harm him, he will do anything, — but stops when he understands what happened, feeling a hot pulsation inside and realizing that he is firmly pressed against you.

  … Through, he looks cute when shows a peace sign while your dick makes a bulge in his stomach, — and delightfully squeezes when he hears a click, meaning that a new photo has been added to your album.

  It would be such a shame if anyone found out that Yuuta Okkotsu loves when his partner fucks him into unconsciousness and gets a wave of orgasms from the fact that his stomach is filled with a huge amount of cum.

(Or when Yuuta has to hold it inside, feeling so full, so filthy, with his nose buried in the pillow, but can’t finish until you take a satisfactory number of photos of his condition and face, making him to spread hips a little wider to capture how much you filled him; or when he fucks himself with fingers, slightly stretching, allowing the seed to flow out over his fingers and thighs, so that you can take more piquant pictures of his condition, cooing about how good and diligent he is for you.)

ৎ୭ Yuuta starts with a low-moderate level of sex drive and ends up having daily sex anywhere every few hours, not wanting to be alone even at night — even when you are separated by kilometers — and also not allowing you to (although somewhat nervously possessive reacting to other people’s flirting with you, trying to gently keep them away from you, and becoming very adept at it by the second year). His attraction increases dramatically when you are around and also drops sharply when you are not around, although the desire itself does not disappear, which is why Yuuta can walk for weeks very tired and unhealthy due to the discrepancy between actions and needs, experiencing great difficulties with expressing sexual desires when you are not around.

  Even if you send him your photos or exchange dirty messages during sexting, Yuuta can’t bring himself to masturbate, even realizing that for his body, accustomed to constant stimulation, it’s not very good — and sublimation doesn’t help much when he feels guilty, knowing that you, having found out about it, probably wouldn’t be satisfied. But Yuuta just can’t do it on his own — and looking at how you try to interact sexually with him from a distance, this guilt only becomes stronger.

(Although, when you find out about it or realize it, seeing his unhealthy state and putting the puzzle in his head, Yuuta ends up several times during the night, hearing your voice ordering him here and there.)

  But when he is next to you again after a long sexual and touching hunger, you spend days hugging and breeding him, holding his hand and filling him until his cheeks become rosy again from warming up — and until Yuuta warms you in response, allowing you to stretch him, push inside and have fun with him even when he sleeps. Making him to cum during sleep, whispering how well he takes you and that he is the prettiest slut you could only dream of, you could fuck him to unconsciousness, knowing that he would only be glad of such treatment — and blush when he sees new photos of his ruddy face from overexcitation, sleeping peacefully even when you hold him tightly by his wet, precum-soaked thigh, preventing him from squeezing and forcing him to cum again in front of the camera.

  This works both ways, however: when you wake up from an orgasm at night, feeling someone diligently licking you, you know for sure that this is not a «very realistic dream», but Yuuta, kissing your hips in love and purring that you look too good and delicious, tucking a strand of hair behind the ear before continuing to caress you, licking everything he can reach.

  The subsequent straddling until your cock is deep inside, tightly squeezed by his too tense body, which is enough for him to cum again, not yet fully recovered from orgasm during throat fucking, you perceive as something natural — although after Yuuta became more skillful with cursed energy and physically trained, this is usually forced you have to give up sleep for a while and making out with him, squeezing his narrow hips while he rides you, until he is satisfied or loses consciousness from hyperstimulation and overwhelmed by sensations (which happened especially often at first), snuggling up to you.

  It can sometimes be a little exhausting, especially when you’ve had a busy day and have to deal with his dissatisfaction as well, but the Yuuta always find the most comfortable way for you to solve all the problems — and you’d be lying if you said that Yuuta, riding your thigh with his tongue sticking out, doesn’t look amazingly photogenic.

ৎ୭ Yuuta can be a little, just a little, too obsessive when it comes to you — every part of you. Praise your body from the bottom up and from the top down, make sure you are always comfortable, watch your happy face, snuggle up to you while you rest, kiss until you get tired, no matter if you are in bed, in class behind friends or on a mission, finding a relatively secluded corner to take care of his need to snuggle to you and get his well-deserved kisses — Yuuta always strives to use his mouth, sensitive enough that even the usual sliding of his lips on your skin feels nice, feeling the rhythm of your heart.

  Blowjob is not something energy-consuming for you — after all, Yuuta is happy to do anything for you, and if he wants to please you and is so needy for any stimulation of his mouth, you are always happy to encourage such behavior. He’s not very skilled at first, even if he doesn’t have any difficulties to take you — maybe sometimes he uses his teeth or doesn’t know how to touch you better, but he’s very diligent and hardworking, and it’s easy to work with him as long as you tell him exactly how you want to feel his mouth on your dick. It’s nice when his lips slide over the shaft, feeling the pulsation, knowing that it was he who made you feel like this — or when his hot mouth wraps around the head, gently stroking before pushing deeper.

  ... Yuuta becomes not that «obsessive» of your dick, but more… worshipful, being carried away by any opportunity to touch you, — even not sexually, — wanting to constantly feel your cock close to the skin and stimulate it, being fascinated by the reaction and the view, faintly realizing that at some point it becomes too obvious — until you directly confront him, rather teasingly ordering to worship your dick out loud if he wants to continue, and reacting almost without surprise when he actually kneels down to do it.

  Not that you can deny that it’s your fault when Yuuta unequivocally shows interest even in a non-sexual setting, allowing you to grab his slutty thin waist to hold him closer, giving him a better feel for you, rubbing, making him blush and almost purr, feeling you so close to the body, but inaccessible, not enough, — almost dragging you along when it turns out to find some free time to leave a few kisses and warm you up.

  Even if his body is rather cold, not very willing to heat up except in cases of illness, he is much hotter inside.

(When he shows you your photo taken while making love in one of the alleys after the mission, you call it «professional deformation» and «I’ll figure out what to do with your hands next time».)