caviar and cigarettes

You have a fear of shopping by yourself as well? I felt like that was only me hating the idea of growing up but same here! I hate being the one to ask for things. Social anxiety at its finest or what? You and me both. It’s just so nice after you get out of a nice bath and burn the candles as you lotion up your body. Is that too much or can you relate to that as well? Right! Like they always look so beautiful when you first get them that you don’t want to destroy it. It’s like an eye shadow palette. You just don’t want to mess it up! Psh, Arya is way cooler than I am. I’m sorry to disappoint. However, you played the icon that is Mary Austin so I don’t think I can compare. Are we just forever children that refuse to grow up? See themselves out of that dark room that I just left. You have no business there!

I mean I would do it if I had no choice but when I get a trolley, I feel like everyone’s looking at me like ‘look at that child playing grown up’ and I start sweating at the check out. We’re going to need to make sure we’re at some event together so we can hide under the tables pretending we’re not there. Oh god, yes! Plain old self love, I’m with that! And when you properly do the housework and light candles at the end as if the final touch. I love that. Eyeshadow palette, yes! Look at us, being mental health twins with the anxiety and ocd. Want to be each others sponsors? Arya is cool, but maisie is cooler. I’ll be your biggest fan, my darling girl. Mary was fun to play! The clothes alone was amazing! Anyway, what’s new with you? Are you enjoying a break just now? Maybe we can have a sleepover and tell ghost stories since we’re like 12 anyway.

jess: idk... think he looks like a 'fatass' to me. looks kind of like if winston churchill procreated with jabba the hutt. it's white and ginger so it's probably scottish, but yeah. he's at mine.

jess: it's sore. :( the physio said i was being dramatic when i visited her but what does SHE know? think he was pissed that i was trying to catch him and keep him captive. love + affection ~ cats don't know her apparently. scratch me any time, didn't know that was a kink of urs.

jess: fantastic! i've got tipping point recorded especially. i'll show you my snazzy new medal. you can stare at it in awe and tell me how amazing i am.

luce: thats so rude, the fatter the cat the cuter the cat, everyone knows that. i cant wait to see him! what have you named him? if you called him fatass, i will phone rspca, just you try me

luce: you'd be lucky to have a scottish cat, mate

luce: she just dismissed your war wounds? what kind of physio woman is she??? wait- did you just steal this cat from the street? i bet you my right big toe that when it comes to giving him to your gran, you've fallen in love with him and cant give him away. this is the start of a beautiful relationship, my darling! i was ready to argue, but it probably is a kink. who doesnt love a bit of pain? plus a back scratch... is there anything better?

Basically the answer to all your questions  is yes, yes it’s the apparent adult thing to do  now days except the peeing part? – maybe stop  drinking water or whatever before going to bed? hi Lucy, I’m Miles. It’s nice to meet you. Well, what are you exactly wanting to know?

I’ve never woke up so regularly in the middle of the night. I value my sleep over bodily functions. I don’t know, growing up is the worst. I don’t see why I have to, I didn’t agree to anything. It’s great to meet you, Miles. I’m a little obsessed with you but I promise I’ll be cool about it. I’m wanting to know how you find the time to have a life? I have a job, my mum and like 2 friends and I’m exhausted.

adelaide: lucy my lil angel, i love you so much 💖

adelaide: I AM !! i'm still in shock too, don't think it'll sink in until she's here. i'm about 16 weeks so almost half way there !! i haven't really thought of any names yet but lucy is def up there. if dylan asks why, well the prettiest girl in the world is called lucy, duh.

adelaide: i'm in LA, so whenever you're here come and see me. i miss your pretty lil face !!

lucy: i cant believe it. you're about to have your very own human. that kid is going to be so beautiful and talented and loved and im tearing up already! how is dylan feeling about it? excited? honestly my heart is so full for you. i gotta see you soon cos im hugging you and never letting go! are you free this weekend? ill come see you this weekend!

Are you for real? You can never be boring, you’re this little bundle of joy. I’ll bring you along on my adventures, you won’t have a choice I’m telling you right here, right now. We’re one and the same, mama boynton and mama deutch would be proud of us for moving out, yet very close. No more wild Zoey and Luce running around, but still close enough so that they can check on us whenever. Oh I don’t want to. Were you trying to be my mom? Oh my Lucy. Well, you tell me! I’m so excited about September when work is going equal spending all my time with you. 

i’m always for real, zo. Yes, please! Let me tag along with you and i’ll pretend i actually have a life through you. Lets make our mums move in together, and then we can move in together like next door and it’ll be beautiful. I was trying to be your mum, i would apologise but you never help me around the house, so. I hope they renew the politician as long as like- supernatural. Work together forever with you is the absolute dream! I just changed my background on my phone to a picture of you and me anyway. Just to be extra creepy.

jess: hey so, i bought a cat.

jess: or rather i bought my gran a cat. and not only is it the most ugly thing i've ever seen but it's just scratched me red. raw.

jess: do you think you can get sepsis from a cat scratch? feel like i might dial 111.

jess: anyway... when are you coming round for an irn bru and a jammie dodger?

luce: you got a cat! what's its name? what colour? is it at yours right now?

luce: idk mate, might have to phone nhs24. is it itchy? maybe its pissed you called it ugly, id scratch you too tbh

lucy: i cant believe it i cant believe it i cant believe it

lucy: YOU'RE GOING TO BE A MUMMY! im still in shock. i am SO excited! you need to tell me everything. all those cute details. how far on are you? whats your due date? have you thought of names? lucy is pretty strong....

So I guess I’m a child as well because my local supermarket did the same and honestly I’ve been feeling so old lately when I see stuff that I remember when I was a kid or if I ask for something, I kinda feel like a kid when I decided to buy myself a nerf gun just to have fun haha. Hello, I’m Matt. It’s nice to meet you, Lucy. 

I’m beginning to think I’m just surrounding myself with the wrong kinds of people because since saying about it, so much people has made me feel a little better. Let me go buy myself a nerf gun and we can have challenges? It’s great to meet you, Matt. White Collar is still one of my favourite shows!

Isn’t it the fucking worst when they decide to throw change on you like that? Like I could’ve spent three minutes, in and out, in that place and then you change the game on me? Fucking hell no! Nothing wrong with buying candles though. I have ‘bout a stack of ‘em in my closet at home and I’m pretty sure I could be considered a hoarder at this point. A hoover? You’re livin’ that grow up life, aye! You’re probably way more grown up than I am. I still order chicken strips at restaurants and run when I shut off the lights in a room. It’s lovely to meet you, Lucy! I’m Maisie. 

Exactly! It does nothing for my fear of shopping alone either because I end up having to speak to the people who work there to show me where everything is. It’s been a while it’s been rearranged now, and can I find the god damn sour cream even though I’ve been shown multiple times? Can I fuck. Thank god you understand! Nothing makes me happy like a lit candle. But then I always feel guilty for burning them? I very much doubt that. Besides, you’re arya stark, you’re a level of coolness all on your own! Nothing wrong with chicken strips. I normally dodge between the chicken sticks and macaroni cheese myself. Ah, see i’m a little more immune to being in the dark now. At this point, I’m calling the demons and murderers to have a go.

Oh gosh, if you’re old, I must be old, cause I think we’re pretty much the same age. I’ll be 25 in August. I don’t know what I would do if somebody rearranged my local supermarket, I think that would really freak me out. Hi, Lucy, I’m Madelaine! It’s nice to meet you.

I turned 25 in January, so yeah we’re definitely close! I feel like everyone else our sort of age is already much more grown up than me. I still ask my mum to come with me to doctors appointments. She waits outside, but it’s the same thing. It’s great to meet you, Madelaine! Riverdale, right? Haven’t gotten round to that yet, but it’s on my list!