Not The Sun

Going on my road trip next week. Europe at the end of the month. Somehow manifested a quicky to Denver with my man. Landed on Maine for my birthday. Washington in July.

January was Florida, all of it (jax>tampa>keys). February is Austin. March is a southwest road trip (petrified forest np>santa fe> white sands np> saguaro np> phoenix> jerome). April is Germany and maybe Luxemburg. May is EDC so I’ll probably stay home. June is my birthday and I don’t know what I’m settling on. July is Washington. So there is the first half of my year.

I have been taking my medication. I have been mindful of what I do to my body. I have been journaling. I have been exercising. I have been studying for my next LSAT. I have been reading. I have been rational and talking things out and putting my emotions in check. I have been doing yoga. I have been saving my money to the best of my abilities. I have been sorting out the relationships in my life and putting my energy into the parts that deserve it. I have been preparing myself to apply to law school. I have been staying in my lane, moisturizing, and breathing deeply. I am taking care of myself and it makes me happy. My social life has always come first and I thought that was where my happiness came from. But when I let it take a back seat and attempt to be selfish with my time, I can see how that is better for me. Sometimes I’m really lonely. But I have always been lonely. And I’m glad that it doesn’t bother me the way it used to. Now when it creeps in, I hug my man, I text someone I love, and I pick up a book. I am trying for myself.