🌸🖤 Shadzy 🖤🌸

For those of us raised as girls, we were told to sit down, shut up, and look pretty. Even if someone wasn’t specifically told that, it was obvious that it was being pushed by the people, media, and social norms around us.

So when we as transmascs and trans men are told /that exact same thing/, to sit down and shut up because someone “more important” is talking, it reminds us of how we were treated when we were little girls or when we were seen as little girls.

And the “look pretty” part doesn’t get left out either. The ratio I’ve seen of “shut up and sit down” in the same sentence as something referring to our genitals (or the genitals they expect us to have) is nearly 1:1.

We have to walk on eggshells constantly. We are either seen as confused and stupid little girls or scary and privileged cis men. I’ve seen countless posts saying something along the lines of “take away the trans part from trans men and it all makes sense” which is ridiculous, obviously. We are trans.

When we step outside that perfect model of either the stereotypical 14 year old with fluffy hair and a high pitched voice or the stereotypical cis man with all the power in the world, we are critiqued at best and abused at worst. When we fit into those stereotypes, we are critiqued at best and abused at worst.

We are treated like dress up dolls that are just a bit broken. We can’t be good enough for everyone, let alone anyone. People put their own perceptions of us above our experiences and then stick their fingers in their ears when we try to tell them that maybe we’re worth listening to.

- it’s fun to be awake & in an upright position

- consciousness is a gift

"Fetishizing cis women" and when you look its a gay trans guy from the UK who writes niche erotica.

"Fetishizing cis women" and its YET ANOTHER openly trans guy who's over the age of 30 and done with being misgendered.

How far does this go? My transmasc oc can’t have bio children without being fetish bait. Can’t write his theoretical pregnancy because that’s fetish bait. Can’t be a bottom because that’s fetish bait. Can’t use my vagina because that’s fetish bait. Can’t be transmasc because that’s fetish bait. Can’t be trans because that’s fetish bait. Can’t write erotica because that’s fetish bait. Can’t walk in public visibly queer because that’s fetish bait.

What CAN I do? What, of my own experiences and emotions, CAN I express without being called fetish content?

Im just a guy that exists that has a complicated relationship with the concept of pregnancy. Sorry that makes you uncomfortable?! Im sorry I’m “coming out of the woodwork” to express my “um actually” and not like, just talking about my own experience. I s2g you can criticize actual objectifying dehumanizing shit without throwing your brothers n siblings just living their lives under the bus by calling their lived or imagined experiences a fetish.

I completely agree that there is a lack of content focusing on transmasc tops, people who only do anal, people who don’t want to be pregnant, etc etc etc. Get out there and create it instead of complaining about the alternative. We need more varied experiences expressed in art, more people expressing themselves honestly. We won’t get that if we have people policing what’s acceptable or not.

internalised misogyny is not:

being a trans man

being non-binary

just not being a woman

being masculine

enjoying yaoi

engaging in yaoi

dating men

liking men