♚ B O W D O W N ♚

You.

Me.

Dumpster.

Amazin’.

[Yeah, she doesn’t really have a more articulate answer for that. Just paps his face and sniffs at him.]

No. What's amazing is the fact that this ain't even the worst of my issues.

[There's a stare.]

Okay. It's a lot of my issues. But I get detachable limbs and that is what matters.

And I also thank you for the sentiment, ma'am.

Well, awhile back me and my cousin had this whole virtual gaming thing going on, and he had me design this, this microchip which was like a neural kickstart to get into the game.

Well, lets just say said game kinda, caused 30 of our beta testers to go into brain death, then the company lost all funding, I went to prison, died in prison-

[There's a pause.]

Apparently some dipshits from ABRAXAS, or the company that I worked for ended up finding my dead body and reanimating it?? They used the corrupt server that caused the brain death, though. Dumped me in a basement and abandoned the project. Not before replacing all my broken limbs and most of my organs with robo-junk, though.

Here we are five years later, I'm a multi-million dollar cyborg who hears dead people and sucks dick for cash.

You bet your sweet cyborg ass I will.

[She has to stop. Look him up and down and lift an eyebrow.]

Medical doctor, genius.

Specializin’ in biology.

I just have to ask because you got those shits with like, doctorates in finding dried up dinosaur shit and they get to be called doctors, so.

[He returns that kiss— literally disregarding how gay this would be if anyone saw them. Glitches even bites on Daniel’s lip a bit.

He honestly did not want to fuck out here in the front of the store. He liked sex, but he wasn’t a exhibitionist. That’s unprofessional.]

The razor works for me though. Puts the lotion on the skin.

Helps to get the hooooooose in.

[A whisper turned half laugh.]

[The comment is followed by a shit eating grin, which he can’t help but stare at Daniel’s mechanic torso. Shit, he was into that. He let his hands touch the torso of the man in his lap, fingers rubbing the crease between the metal and skin. His other hand rubbed at a hip.]

...If I say I've bleached and waxed, would you laugh?

I - really hate razor rash.

For me? Well, You can do one of two things.

Let me sit in your lap so I can get paid, oooooooor you can give me free drugs, which I can then sell, and make MORE money to blow on porn and BETTER drugs.

[He doesn’t come up with anything to retort that. Mostly because it wasn’t really even necessary. He was going to stop calling him kiddo anyway, if it really bothered him.

He pulls away after taking the time to explore the backsides of the man's teeth, and grins.]

You know that I could sit here like this forever? I make a very good lapcat.

Oh shit. I actually did it right? Fuckin’ sweet. Alright.

[He’s sitting down in his chair, legs a little spread open and hands out.]

Quit with the kiddo thing or I'll start calling you daddy.

[There’s a laugh.]

Well if you pole dance, I commend you. I realize how hard that shit is. I tried it once. Didn’t get very far.

[He laughs right back, but this time, he's back to being a little too dangerously close, hand grazing his pants pockets to check.

Yup, no wallet.

But he does grab his ass though. Surprise, Matt! Your cyborg dumbass here is a freak.]