Look At The Moon🌙

6 years later…

You’re standing outside a park entrance with your dog on Jeju island waiting for Seunghyun to join you. He went to grab coffee from a shop around the corner so you could have an afternoon together as a family. Suddenly, you hear the squeal of a tiny voice and footsteps barreling towards you.

You turn to see a young girl, about three years old, running towards you with outstretched arms. “A doggie!”

She’s followed by who you assume is her brother, a boy around the age of five.

You immediately crouch down to catch her. “Woah there little one. It’s never safe to run up on a dog. You never know if they’re friendly or not.”

“See? I told you!” The boy scolds. “Not all dogs are friendly.”

“I am so sorry.” A woman, presumably her mother says, walking swiftly towards you. “We were in the shop and she got away from me as I was paying…she just loves dogs and I’m not as quick on my feet when my hands are full…”

You smile warmly back, noting the sleeping child in her arms. “This is Rembrandt. You can call him Remy.”

“I’m Ji-An.” She smiles.

“It’s nice to meet you.” You smile as you help the little girl get properly acquainted with your Shiba. “If you ask your mom you can play with him here in the park.”

“Pleeeeeaaaassse Eomma?” Ji-An begs.

“If it’s okay with…”

“Y/N.” You reply warmly.

“If it’s okay with Y/N we can wait here for Appa. But take your brother with you.” She adds as you hand the children a ball. “I’m Chae-Yeon by the way.”

They follow you into the park, the two children running off to play, while you and Chae-Yeon take a seat on the bench.

“Are you here on vacation?” You inquire looking towards the entrance for your husband.

“We live here.” Chae-Yeon smiles. “It’s quiet, away from the city. Just how we like it. What about you?”

“Vacation. My husband is a producer and I run my own dance studio so it’s nice to disconnect every now and then. But we love the hustle and bustle of Seoul.”

“My husband and I prefer the opposite. He was once in entertainment and I was a museum curator. Now, I’m a full time mom and loving every moment.” She laughs, shifting the child in her arms.

“I can hold her if you’d like a break.” You smile. “It seems like you have your hands full.” Chae-Yeon passes the baby to you with appreciation. You take in their tiny features.

“It’s the most fulfilling thing I’ve ever done…but being a mom of four out and about is difficult sometimes.” She exhales. “Just not enough hands.”

“Four?” You say surprised.

“Twins. My husband has the other one. He went to the bakery nearby for the kids.”

“It sounds like the two of you make a good team.”

Chae-Yeon smiles. “We do. We just…click. We got married within three months of meeting. It just felt right. We both wanted a big family, so we got started right away.”

“You can’t deny connections like that.” You say, thinking of Seunghyun.

“Have you and your husband been together long?” She asks.

“Over 20 years in some capacity…”

“So the two of you have a connection too.” She smiles. You note her face lighting up at the recognition of only who you can assume is her husband. “As a matter of fact, here comes my husband now.”

“Making friends or trying to give our daughter away to a stranger?" The man jokes, placing a kiss on his wife’s cheek.

You freeze, it can’t be…

“This kind stranger so graciously gave my arms a break. Our oldest daughter got up close and personal with her shiba and the rest is history. We became fast friends.”

“We welcome any help we can get.” His laugh turns into a cough as turns to face you.

Jae stands before you. A bit older, hair longer, a baby in a carrier strapped to his chest, happy.

You look up, bouncing his child on your lap. “Hi Jae.”

His eyes are wide, caught off guard. Jae scans your left hand looking for a wedding ring. Fair, you think, it’s only natural that he would hope you ended up sad and alone.

“You know each other?” Chae-Yeon asks.

“We did.” You say, looking to him for the correct way to continue.

“This is…she and I…dated before I met you.” He stumbles on his words, looking to his wife.

Chae-Yeon looks back at you wide eyed. “Wait…you’re the one who left him all those years ago at TUDUM?”

“Guilty.” You say, awkwardly as you wonder where the conversation is headed.

Suddenly, Chae-Yeon pulls you into a hug. “Thank you. I owe this beautiful life to you. You made the right choice.”

You pull back and smile, still holding their baby. “This is a show of gratitude I was not expecting…”

“She’s right…” Jae begins. “I think we both know this wasn’t where our relationship was headed. Ending our relationship…”

As messy as it was…you think.

“It was the right thing to do.” Jae is quiet a moment then asks, “So…you’re here with your dog on vacation? Alone?”

Before you can answer you hear one of your favorite sounds echo across the park.

”Eomma! We found you!”

Jae looks surprised as your son runs towards you carrying a paper bag, Seunghyun not far behind.

“We got hotteok!” He grins, leaping onto the bench beside you.

“So that’s what took you so long to get here.” You smile, taking the bag. “You and your Appa love to sample a food stall…”

Seunghyun comes up beside you, handing you a coffee. ”Sorry for the delay. We took a detour.” He surveys the situation and clears his throat. “Um, it's good to see you Jae.”

Jae extends his hand. “Seunghyun…you’re…”

“Still around? Yeah. Not planning on going anywhere.”

Jae clears his throat as your son approaches him.

“Hello, I’m Taejoon.” He bows politely.

“Hello I’m…”

“This is Jae.” You add. “He’s…”

”An old friend.” Jae says, extending his hand to the boy. “It’s great to meet you. This is Chae-Yeon and this little one is Jungwoo, your mom has Ji-Ah, and over there playing with your dog is Ji-An and Ji-Woo.”

Taejoon looks towards Ji-An and Remy then to the baby on your lap. “You have a lot of kids.” Your son says without missing a beat.

Seunghyun takes a sip of his coffee, stifling a laugh before stating “Kids say the darndest things…”

Can I play with them?” Taejoon asks, changing the subject.

“Of course, go on.” You say encouragingly.

“He’s…yours?” Jae asks, watching him run off to play.

“I suppose it’s hard for you to believe, but yes. He’s our son.” Seunghyun adds, placing a protective hand on your shoulder.

He looks between you and Seunghyun as if he’s absorbing the reality that the two of you remained together after all this time. “I’m happy for you...really I am.”

Chae-Yeon picks up on the tension. “Seunghyun, why don’t we go check on the kids?” She grabs the baby from you with a hopeful smile.

You nod, signaling to your husband it’s okay to go.

“I think we both ended up where we belong.” Jae says quietly, sitting beside you on the bench. “I was angry for a long time, even after Chae and I got married…but when my son was born…”

“You realized your life was so much better without me.”

“Something like that…” Jae adds. “Chae loves kids and the countryside and this whole life we’ve built. It’s…”

“Everything you dreamed of.” You say, taking Jae’s hand, giving it a squeeze. “And I love the life Seunghyun and I have built. Like you, it’s everything I could’ve dreamed of.”

He nods, smiling. “I think I was angry because…you were right.”

His confession takes you off guard.

”I know…it was a shock for me too, but its the truth. We…weren’t compatible in the way that Chae and I are. Those things I said to you that day…you didn’t deserve it. I’m sorry.” Jae’s voice is sincere.

“I forgave you long ago, Jae. But thank you.”

“I wasn’t expecting this kind of reunion.” He sighs. “Running into you after all these years…I’m glad we were both able to come out on the other side.”

“Happy and whole.” You grin.

The two of you watch as Seunghyun approaches, out of breath from playing with the kids alongside Chae-Yeon. “Tag is a bit different when there's so many children involved.”

The three of you laugh.

“Not everyone is cut out for a team of children.” Chae-Yeon adds bouncing the baby on her hip. “I do envy the ease of having the right amount of hands to parent…But Jae and I like to have our hands full.”

Seunghyun takes a seat beside you, placing a comforting hand on your leg, knowing where your mind has wandered. The thought of two children. Taejoon playing with an older sibling…

“One child or ten, what’s important is working as a team with your partner.” Jae says, sensing your sadness. “I appreciate you sending the Hockeney piece.” He adds, changing the subject.

“It was rightfully yours...and our attempt at a peace offering.” You say, placing your hand on your husband’s.

”He’ll never admit it, but the day it arrived ranks up there with our wedding day and birth of our children.” Chae adds.

“Okay, that’s a bit dramatic…” Jae counters.

”You almost cried.” She adds.

”Let me guess, he has a framed photo of him with the painting as a kid hangin beside it?” You jest.

Chae-Yeon breaks out into laughter. “You would be correct.”

The awkwardness of meeting subsides and you all catch up on the past few years while the children play with Remy. Jay and Seunghyun talk about art curation while you and Chae-Yeon talk about life and motherhood. The conversations solidify the choices made years prior. These are the lives Jae and I deserve. Before you know it the sun is setting. As the four of you wrangle the children Jae leans in.

”I know I didn’t get it at the time but I’m glad we ended it…I’m glad we didn’t settle. And I’m glad you became the mom you deserved to be.”

Tears prick your eyes as you smile back at him appreciatively, then pull him into a hug. ”Me too. It was really good to see you Jae. I wish you all the best.”

”You too.” He says as his wife and kids return, thanking you for the time with Remy.

“It was a pleasure talking with you Y/N. If you all ever find yourselves in Jeju again, please reach out. We would be happy to host you at our home.”

”Please bring Remy too!” Ji-An adds.

“Of course.” Seunghyun smiles. “We will visit again soon.”

—————————-

On the walk back to the hotel, you walk Remy as Seunghyun grabs Taejoon, dramatically throwing him over his shoulders. Your son wraps his arms tightly around his father’s neck, riding piggy back.

His intense laughter brings a bright smile to your face as you lean into Seunghyun and release a sigh, processing the impromptu reunion.

“What’s the sigh for, Princess?” He asks, slinging his free arm around you.

”I’m just thinking how everything turned out just as it should.” You say looking up at your boys with pride. “Seeing him again with his wife and kids…”

”They have TOO MANY kids.” Taejoon says innocently.

Seunghyun chuckles. “More children than they have hands…but every family is perfect in its own way…”

“I love our family. Eomma, Appa, Rembrandt…and Me!” Taejoon says happily.

“Right Taejoon, that's all we need.” Seunghyun says confidently, looking at you.

“Clearly, I’m right where I am supposed to be.”

”We are right where we are supposed to be, Princess.” Seunghyun says, placing a kiss on the crown of your head. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

🩵🩵🩵

Masterlist

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Seunghyun purchases the painting on your behalf and gets you on the first flight back to Seoul, with him. Since the argument with Jae you’ve been left feeling numb and in limbo. Your whole life is upside down and you really aren’t sure what direction you’re going anymore. You just want to stay afloat.

Seunghyun’s presence has been grounding. He’s always been one that can sit in silence and just be present in the space with you. For now, that’s enough. When the car pulls up outside of your building he helps you gather your suitcase.

He speaks for the first time since the plane landed. “I need some time.” He says in a reassuring tone. “I have something I need to do…for you…us.”

You look up at him dazed. After everything, you’re not in a headspace to make any sort of commitments or life altering decisions so you just nod and whisper, “Okay.”

“Jiyong has everything ready for you when you get packed. Just text him and we will have a moving company take your things to storage. Your room is already set up at his place.”

You simply nod again. Realizing the last 4 years of your life is about to be evicted from the building before you.

“We are going to get you through this.” He says, kissing your forehead.

A faint smile crosses your lips as you grab the handle of your suitcase and turn to head inside.

When you cross the apartment threshold you realize the home you once considered a sanctuary now feels sterile. You place your suitcase at the door, no reason to unpack if I’m just getting ready to leave again…for good, and begin walking through the rooms, taking mental inventory or what you need to pack and what will stay behind. When you finish, you're exhausted and realize the person that moved in was just playing house. You never truly let your guard down with Jae. You tried, god did you try, but you just couldn’t do it. Your heart always belonged to someone else, Seunghyun.

As you work throughout the week, you realize nothing in the apartment is a reflection of your true self. Those things are still packed away under the bed or in the back of your massive shared closet. You gather those things first, as they are the most important to you. Your days are the same, pack and organize all day, followed by a long hot dissociating shower, then ending with a night of fitful sleep.

As expected, Jae cuts off all contact with you leaving communication solely between you and his manager. One morning, you wake to a formal email ending your relationship officially.

Miss Y/N,

The relationship and affiliation you once held with Kim Jae-Joon has been terminated, effective immediately. From this point on, he requests no contact.

Mr. Kim prefers to not call attention to the situation that occurred in hopes the two of you can move forward with your lives quietly and separately. No formal statement of your breakup will be made and he requests that you do the same.

Mr. Kim also requests that you vacate the penthouse by August 1st. Anything remaining in the home after his return that is deemed unacceptable will be trashed or donated. He will not speak ill of you in the media under the condition you agree to the above terms.

Thank you for your time.

The office of Kim Jae-Joon

The last few years of your life are reduced to those lifeless paragraphs and a handful of boxes picked up to be stored at a facility arranged by Jiyong and Seunghyun. After a few weeks of organizing and packing you find yourself once again living out of a suitcase in Jiyong’s guest room.

Zoa and Iye are curled up beside you as you lie in bed on your back, staring at the ceiling. My life is a dumpster fire…

Jiyong knocks, peeking his head around the doorframe. “You hanging in there?”

You don’t move and continue to stare. “My life has spiraled back to square one, I’m just great.” You say sarcastically.

Jiyong crawls into the bed beside you, propping himself up on his elbows. “You and I both know you’re not starting from the bottom. You’re just…picking up where you left off 6 years ago.”

You cover your face with your hands. “I shouldve been more upfront with him. His reaction…”

“I think his response made it clear he couldn’t handle the truth.” Jiyong adds supportively. “When you told him it wasn't going to matter, his response would be the same. The fact that it involved Seunghyun made him too insecure. You can’t erase the history you have with someone.”

You turn towards him. “Ji, what if this happened after we got married? Or we actually had a baby together? Things would’ve been so bad…I really fucked this up.” You groan into his chest.

Jiyong pulls you close to him, squeezing you tight. “You and I both know you’re right where you’re supposed to be. Seunghyun is going to make things right.”

You chuckle, cautiously. “See you say that, but Seunghyun hasn’t so much as breathed near me since I got back. He’s probably spiraling about how he’s yet again ruined my life. I’m going to die alone.” You whine. “Honestly? I deserve it.”

“I can assure you that’s not the case. He’s…working on something and you’ll find out soon enough.” Ji says cryptically.

“Whatever you say Mr. Dragon.”

——————————————

A week later, you're on Jiyong’s balcony, chain smoking and indulging in a bottle of vintage red. Jiyong was in America for his Übermensch tour, leaving you on cat duty. As you're polishing off the bottle, you're completely oblivious to what is going on inside the penthouse.

—————————-

Seunghyun entered quietly, using the spare key Jiyong had given him years ago. Initially, his plan was to just surprise you, but when he noticed you seemed preoccupied outside, he took it upon himself to up his game.

Utilizing the spare candles in the cabinet, he decided to set the mood. Zoa and Iye watch with skepticism from one of the chairs.

“You’ll be happy to know, I’m finally making things right.” Seunghyun says to them. “So you can wipe that look of judgement off your face Zoa.” Zoa meows and turns away from him as she catches your movement on the balcony.

——————————

After finishing your last cigarette, and last glass of wine, you head inside to find the living room covered in candles. Zoa and Iye watching cautiously from the armchair in the corner.

You approach one of the candles just to make sure they’re real. Oh good, I’m drunk, but not to the point I am imagining things…You walk over to the kitchen, place your glass in the sink, then turn to find Seunghyun standing in the middle of the room.

“Surprise.” He says in his deep voice.

The sight of him causes you to become overcome with emotion. You don’t ask questions, you simply walk over to him quickly and melt into his arms.

He kisses the top of your head as you get lost in his cologne. “I want to say something before I get too emotional.” He smiles into your hair. “Can we sit?”

You look up at him, eyes glassy from tears and wine. “Whatever you want Tempo, I’m yours.”

He leads you over to the couch, brushing a stray hair out of your face. “You’re a little drunk…”

”Only a little.” You smile.

He clears his throat. “I should’ve done this years ago but I was too afraid. Too concerned about what YG would think, or impacting the career I thought I wanted but that time is over now and it's time for me to do what I want. What’s best for me…for us.”

”Us?” You breathe.

“There has always been an us Y/N. I am done running from it. Done watching you walk out of my life. Done pushing you away. I want you forever. Through the worst, the best, everything in between. You are my life.”

His words sober you instantly. “Seunghyun…are you…”

He slides off the couch onto one knee in front of you. “Will you…”

”YES!” You practically cry out, falling forward into his arms, pushing him backwards onto the rug. ”A million times yes, Seunghyun.”

He lets out a graveled laugh as he looks up at you. “You didn’t even let me finish.”

“We have been together too long for formalities. I will absolutely marry you.” You say kissing him for the first time in months.

”I was actually going to ask you to move in with me, but marriage works too.” He grins.

Your cheeks flush with embarrassment as you push yourself off of him, standing. “But…you got on one knee…”

”Shhhh.” He smiles wide back at you, pulling you into a hug. “I’m kidding. I was proposing to you.” He pulls a small ring box out of his pocket. Inside is an intricate white gold and diamond band with an interlacing design. “It’s more of a wedding band…I thought we could just skip the engagement…”

”I love it.”

“But I do want you to move in with me…in fact, all your things are already there. I…had your boxes dropped off at my place and just…”

”Put them back where they once were?” You say, tearfully.

He nods with a small smile. “Yeah…it's all back where it used to be…home.” He says leaning in to kiss you.

“I love you, Tempo.” You say, jumping up, wrapping your legs around him. “Take me to the bedroom?” You smile at him, breathlessly.

“Hmm, need some privacy…away from the kids.” He laughs in reference to the cats, as he heads down the hallway.

The two of you shed your clothing and climb under the covers.

He pulls you to him, propping himself up with one arm while caressing your face with the other.

“Things will never be like they were after my enlistment.”

You reach up, taking his hand. “Seunghyun, I forgave you long ago…”

“No.” He stops you, kissing your knuckles. “I need you to know that how I treated you was not okay. I hurt you. Emotionally…physically. I promise to keep you safe moving forward. Love you the way you deserve.”

“I know you will.” You whisper as he positions himself on top of you as you open yourself to him.

He sinks into you slowly, his mouth capturing your moan.

His pace is cautious, as if you might break or disappear from beneath him at any moment.

You lace your hand with his, lifting your hips to meet him, taking in every inch of him.

Tonight is a reset of your entire relationship, a clean slate. For the first time, you both decided on each other, in unison. No more backing out, no more running. From this point forward it’s you and him, hand in hand, headed towards a future you forge together.

______________________________

Returning to Seunghyun’s apartment was as if you’d never left. He returned everything to its rightful place. You’d learned later on that when you moved out all those years ago he had left everything as it was. The drawers, cabinets, and closet you once occupied just had empty space as if waiting for your return.

The two of you wasted no time and eloped as soon as possible at the local district office as soon as the paperwork was filed. You both choose to wear your wedding bands on your middle fingers to keep the mystery. Korean media had yet to get wind of your break up with Jae-Joon and due to his sudden retirement, they had lost interest him. For the first time in a long time you were back to how life was long ago and it was everything you and Seunghyun could ever imagine.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

The deep notes and Seunghyun’s dulcet tone of Desperado pull you out of the memory. Where is Seunghyun? The album is over half way through and you’ve yet to track him down. Finally, you see him standing, cornered by two people you can’t quite place. You decide to head over when an arm links with yours.

“Real bold of you getting married and having the audacity to not invite me.” A familiar voice teases.

“Chae-Rin! Oh my god!” You all but shout, embracing her. “I can’t believe you’re here.”

“Oppa knew better than to not include me. It’s so good to have him back.” She smiles.

“You have no idea.”

“But seriously, congratulations. A secret elopement that even the media hasn’t caught on to…that’s so…”

“Us.” You grin. “We just wanted it to be quiet, intimate.”

“Yeah, yeah. He’s all about the quiet life these days. He deserves it...alongside you.” She smiles. “But with an album this fire, I doubt he will be able to keep a low profile for very long. He’s about to be a very busy man.”

“Like everything he does, it’s a work of art.” You say proudly. “Catch up soon? I have yet to see my husband tonight…”

“And you two are still making up for lost time.” She winks. “I’ll call you soon.” Chae-Rin smiles. “Go get your man.”

After what feels like a lifetime, you finally approach Seunghyun. “There you are.” You breathe, linking your arm with his. ”I was beginning to feel like you weren’t actually in attendance tonight.”

”I am the man of the evening, remember? I’m meant to mingle.” He grins before leaning in to kiss you. “You okay?”

You nod. “Being here, seeing old photos…it’s brought back a lot of memories all at once.”

He frowns. “There’s been a plethora of good times and bad. Especially here…”

“Hey…” you reach up, touching his face. “We are going to replace that memory with a new one. A happier one. Celebrating your first full length solo album…”

“With my wife.” He says, pulling your waist closer to him.

“Mmhmm, I love it when you call me that. My husband…” you whisper as you press your body into his.

“You know, I originally wrote this song about you.” He says, referencing Desperado playing in the background. “It’s had some updates…but I still remember the thrill of trying to impress you.” He says, his hand sliding down your thigh.

You blush. “Lucky for you I’m right here…always and forever, no more chasing.”

“Sometimes I miss the thrill of the hunt.” He says, nibbling your ear, grabbing your ass.

“We can play pretend a little later.” You wink, palming him discreetly over his pants. “You have guests to mingle with…remember?”

The upbeat melody of FOR FANS snaps you both out of your daze as Jackpot approaches with Sora. You carefully position yourself in front of your husband as he adjusts himself.

Sora’s face is telling. “Wait. Are you two…”

Seunghyun clears his throat. “Together? Um, yeah.”

She looks between the two of you surprised. “Well shit. It’s 2006 all over again.”

“And all those years in between.” You add.

“I’m shocked, really. Not long ago, the tabloids were going crazy with you and…”

“We ended things last May.” You say confidently. “Quietly…but It’s over.”

She nods, getting the message loud and clear.

“Right. Well, I’m happy for you both. In all honesty, everyone knew deep down the two of you were end game…we just weren’t sure if either of you realized it yet.” She smiles warmly.

“It took a lot of work, but we finally got there.” Seunghyun smiles, his hand finding your waist. “Come with me, I want to be sure you hear the next two songs.”

The two of you excuse yourselves and make your way up to the front area of the studio.

Stendhal Syndrome begins and you can’t help but smile wide at the intro.

Born again it’s the new Tempo…

You look up at Seunghyun who is blushing just enough that you can see it at the tops of his ears.

As you listen, you realize the song is about you…mostly.

Ya Good morning lady

You woke up with my killer Taste

Coffee, yeah, it’s deep

Truffle over Egg benedict Gonna make money for Us

You lean into him. “Is this song about me or Jiyong?” You tease.

He wraps his arms around you from behind and leans in close. “Let’s just say, it’s about the two most important people in my life.”

“Regardless, it’s perfect.” You smile.

When the song ends, Seunghyun grabs a fresh glass of wine and approaches the front of the studio, gathering everyone’s attention.

“I just want to say thank you to everyone who came tonight to celebrate my first album. It has been a long time coming and there’s no one else I’d rather share this moment with than all of you.”

Attendees shout out words of endearment and raise their glasses in celebration as you watch carefully.

“There’s one last song on the album. One I began writing years ago and was only recently able to finish. I want to dedicate this song to the person who has been with me since 2006 when I first debuted. Someone who has seen me at my worst and, thankfully, now at my best. We have been many things over the years. In 2019 our relationship almost evolved into something completely different, which was the original inspiration for this song, Be Solid. I wanted to be solid for the chapter that was to come. Unfortunately, we weren’t given that opportunity…” He trails off, making eye contact with you.

Be Solid is the song he was writing for…our baby…

“Now the song symbolizes what I want to be for her…for us…moving forward. Y/N, I dedicate this song to you and promise to be a more solid friend, partner, and husband to you as we build our future together.”

The crowd turns to look towards you, tears already pricking your eyes as you smile back at the love of your life.

“Thank you for coming, enjoy.” Seunghyun takes a bow before heading straight over, taking you in his arms, dipping you backwards in a passionate kiss…On display for everyone to see. You hear Chae-Rin shout, “It’s about damn time!” as onlookers applaud.

The two of you stand hand in hand as you let the lyrics wash over you.

Tryna be someone better for you

Wanna be someone you come home to

Write these poems all for you

Tears fall down like rain

Tryna be someone better for you

I wanna be more solid, solid, solid

Boda Pogeun-pogeun solid, solid, solid wanna be more solid

wanna be more solid

A faith I can’t explain- screaming into the air, writing out a brand new scene

Me and you — we matching

No more pain, just moonlight, moonlight

On steady path, you my Vaccine Vaccine Vaccine

Anywhere you go

NANA NANANA NANA NA

I am on it, “BE SOLID”

While the road was long and difficult to get to this point, it led you both back to each other, where you belong. You look up at your husband as you listen to his promise.

You know in your heart the best is yet to come.

🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

A few Months later…

Seunghyun slipped into your studio lobby unnoticed. His beanie on, hoodie up with his jacket zipped tight. The cold December air was bone chilling in Seoul. He had just returned from his Fan Meet in Taiwan. Originally, you had planned to attend with him but decided against it last minute. You just weren’t feeling up to it. These days, you have been saving most of your energy for your classes. He’d only been gone a week but it felt like an eternity away from you. As soon as he landed, he dropped his bags off at home and came straight to your studio.

Seunghyun approaches the glass window where the other parents have gathered to watch as their sons and daughters follow along with your instructions. He can’t help but smile watching you. Your hair in a messy bun, wearing leggings and one of his oversized hoodies, your face full of animation as you attempt to command a room of five year olds. Seeing you in your element makes his heart swell with pride.

“Which one is yours?” The woman next to him asks, gesturing to the children gathered around you.

“The instructor.” Seunghyun laughs. “She’s my wife.”

“My daughter, Seo-ah, absolutely adores her. She has such a gift for dancing and working with children. We are really going to miss her during her leave. The other instructors are great, but your wife is outstanding…Congratulations by the way.” She smiles up at him.

“Thank you.” He says with a small bow. “Dancing is her passion. I am sure she won’t stay gone for long.”

Seunghyun watches as you arrange the children in their respective rows, then start the music. You dramatically count down then prompt them to begin, stepping back against the mirrored wall to take them all in. One hand rests on your growing bump as the other helps guide students back in line as they get out of step with their peers.

The past few months have been a whirlwind for the two of you. Marriage, an album release, a fan meet tour, the unexpected pregnancy test…

Seunghyun remembers the morning vividly.

✨✨✨✨✨✨

The day started as it always did with coffee and breakfast typically followed by small talk and plans for the day. That morning was…different. Recently, you held yourself differently, a softness creeping in that he couldn’t quite place.

He watched as you came into the kitchen, his Pink Floyd shirt hanging loosely from your shoulder, a look of weariness on your face.

“You okay?” He asks, placing his hand on your forehead before handing you your coffee.

“I’m fine.” You insist. Placing the mug down instead of taking a sip.

Seunghyun looks back at you quizzically over his mug. “Something is bothering you…”

You play with the corner of the napkin under your coffee cup, leaning on the island. “There’s a possibility…” You begin, avoiding eye contact. “I…we…” Like all those years ago, you can’t bring yourself to finish the sentence.

He puts his mug down and closes the space between you, pulling you into his chest. “We don’t keep secrets between us.” He says, resting his chin on the top of your head. “Whatever is bothering you, we can talk about it. I’ve noticed you’ve been…off.”

You look up at him. “You have?”

He nods, brushing a loose strand of hair away from your face and tucking it behind your ear. “Did you get some news at work or did Jae find out about our…”

”I think I’m pregnant.” You cut him off quickly before losing your nerve.

His body tenses, but not in the way it did before. He looks at you intently before finally speaking. “You think or you know?”

“Think…I took a test but…it’s in the bathroom. I can’t bring myself to look at it.” Your voice is small, shaky. “I don’t want to get your…our hopes up.”

You both wanted this so badly, but you knew being older, it may no longer be in the cards for the two of you. This was the first time since getting back together you had missed your period. It could be nothing or it could be everything…

“We will look together.” Seunghyun says, hiding his nerves. “Whatever the result, it changes nothing between us.” He then takes your hand and leads you to the master bathroom where the plastic stick holding your fates is waiting.

At the count of three, you both peer over the counter to find two bright pink lines staring back at you.

“I’m…we…” You stumble back in disbelief.

Seunghyun takes you into his arms, his cheeks already wet with tears. “We’re having a baby, Princess.”

The road to the present was a long one. The fear of losing what you both wanted so badly took over the first trimester. Every scan and appointment was a reminder of the trauma you endured all those years ago. In the new territory of the second trimester, you both settled into the reality of becoming parents with a little more confidence. Painting and decorating the nursery, making lists and registries. Seeing your baby and hearing the heartbeat at appointments gave you both peace of mind in a way you never imagined. Now in the third trimester, excitement has taken over. Buying necessary items, involving friends and family, and preparing to bring your baby home.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Seunghyun comes back to reality when the door opens into the lobby and a mass of children enter.

”All right, friends! Remember, two more weeks until our recital. Practice, practice, practice!” You announce in a sing-song voice.

”Yes Miss Choi!” They all say in unison. Some choosing to give you hugs, others high five as they depart to find their parents.

”Bye bye baby! Be good to your Eomma.” Your last student says, patting your stomach before leaving with his mother.

You can’t help but smile as you lock the door behind them, finding your husband’s reflection in the glass, admiring you from across the way. You turn to face him, “What are you doing here Tempo? I was planning on meeting you at home.”

”I couldn’t wait to see you, Princess.” He says, kissing you.

You wrap your arms around him, tight. “Hmm, it’s good to have you back. We missed you.”

“How’s our boy?” He asks, his hand caressing your stomach.

“Active. He’s been giving off a lot of main dancer energy this week…like his dad.” You wink. “And…we’re hungry.” You smile up at him. “How about I grab my stuff and we enjoy some takeout on the couch?”

“That sounds like a picture perfect night to me.” He replies as you grab your dance bag and close up the studio. He helps you put on your coat, then wraps his arm around you as you head into the chilly city of Seoul towards home where you’re life together is just getting started.🩵

————————————-

MASTERLIST

CH 7

More people have arrived, including Chae Kyoung-Sun, the art director from Squid Game and Seunghyun’s Studio54 music video. The last time you saw her was in LA when things were…less than ideal.

“Y/N!” She calls out to you. “I didn’t think I’d see you here. Is Jae-Joon with you?”

“Um, no. Not tonight.” You say quietly.

“His announced retirement from acting was a shock. What are you two going to get up to with all his free time? The tabloids mentioned a baby on the way…” She winks, before her eyes drift to your midsection. You raise your wine glass, taking a long sip, shutting down her theory.

”Oh, well. You know how the media loves rumors.” Her attention is drawn to the intricate diamond band on your middle finger. “Your ring is stunning. Jae really out did himself. It’s clear that he is dedicated to curating the most beautiful life for the two of you. I look forward to seeing it unfold.”

You smile back at her. “He is very dedicated to making his dreams come true.” You say convincingly, when you hear Seunghyun’s graveled laughter across the room, grabbing you attention. “If you’ll excuse me.”

The chimes of Seoul Chaos followed by Seunghyun’s harmonizing vocals send a chill down your spine as you recall last year.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Your trip to LA was going to be a fresh start. You would wipe yourself clean of Seunghyun for good and move towards your new life with Jae. No more wavering.

The lust you once had for Seunghyun had been replaced with anger, which fueled your desire to make Jae’s dreams a reality, propelling the narrative forward. Jae was vocal in interviews about settling down with you and starting a family and you no longer denied it. Instead, you committed to the bit, showing affection publicly and speaking candidly about your future together when on the red carpet. The media loved you as a couple and the tabloids loved making predictions about your lives together, giving you motivation to keep going. What you didn’t know is that every wedding prediction and baby watch post was ripping Seunghyun’s heart out.

You and Jae ring in the New Year of 2025 in LA where he is filming what is said to be the biggest film of his career.

It will also be his last. After much deliberation, he’s decided to retire from acting and follow his dream of pursuing a simplistic life.

In a strange chain of events, that you could only chalk up to fate, you run into Seunghyun while at lunch with Jae. He’s telling you about the property he is purchasing when he notices someone familiar enter the restaurant. You prepare yourself for an introduction.

“Hey babe, this is IRKO. He’s been working on the sound mixing for the film soundtrack.”

“A pleasure.” You smile, extending your hand.

“So you’re the infamous Y/N.” He smiles. “I’ve heard a lot about you from Jae.” He then turns his attention behind him. “This is TOP.”

You open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out.

”Hey, Seunghyun!” Jae stands, hugging him. “Good to see you again. Your work on Squid Game was amazing. You here for promotion?”

“No, working on music actually.”

His solo album.

”You two know each other? Small world!” IRKO exclaims. “Have you met Jae’s lovely lady?”

“We’ve met.” Seunghyun says, avoiding eye contact.

“It’s good to see you too.” You mumble as he turns to walk towards their table.

IRKO follows after a friendly wave, oblivious to the awkwardness of the situation.

“He’s an interesting one…standoffish. No wonder things didn’t work out when you met for that art acquisition I asked about.” Jae chuckles, reflecting on the interaction. “He’s become such a recluse. It’s hard to believe he once shared a stage with G Dragon. Now that’s an idol...”

“Speaking of GD. He’s invited us to the opening Übermensh show in Korea next month…I thought it would be a good break from work.” You smile wide.

“No way! That’s awesome, babe.” He says, genuinely excited. “It’s still so wild to me that you have that kind of relationship with him.”

“I told you we were close. You just can’t seem to wrap your head around it.” You grin. You’ve been trying to allude to the impact BIGBANG has had on your life in hopes of coming clean with Jae about your past. Each time you bring it up he seems to brush it off, not wanting to fully hear what you’re saying.

Jae then jumps into a long spiel about the land he’s closing on in Jeju Island. The secluded, off the grid style location is beautiful, just not really your vibe…but it will be, you tell yourself. Your mind wanders as you look around the cafe just in time to lock eyes with Seunghyun. You remain emotionless and you can tell by his expression it hurts. Good.

As you and Jae stand to leave you pull him into a kiss. He grabs your ass in response and you let out a playful giggle in hopes of drawing attention. You look back to see Seunghyun’s jaw clench before leaving the cafe hand in hand.

————————-

A month later, you and Jae have the time of your lives at Jiyong’s concert. The after party is filled with you making introductions for Jae who is astounded by the amount of people you know in the music industry.

“My girl is a celebrity!” He says kissing you deeply. “This has been the best night. I’m so glad you pulled me away from filming. LA was really dragging me down.”

“You deserve it.” You say kissing him back. “Besides…gotta get out while we can right?” You wink, feeding into his ‘let’s start a family’ plan.

Jae is whispering something about finding a coat closet to hook up in when you look up to see Jiyong spot you from across the room. He heads directly towards you.

“Shit, that’s G Dragon.” Jae says enthusiastically. “Do you think he’s coming this way to talk with us?”

“I’m sure he is.” You say apprehensively, knowing Jiyong is coming for you.

When he reaches your table, Jiyong puts on a show. “Infamous actor Kim Jae-Joon, good to finally meet you in person.”

Starstruck, Jae grips his hand tightly. “The fact that you have heard of me floors me. It’s truly an honor. Your show was outstanding.” He looks to you, nervously. “I-I guess you know my girlfriend already?”

“I could never forget her.” Jiyong says, emotionless. “I actually need to borrow her for a moment. Hope you don’t mind Jae.” He says, flashing his million dollar smile.

“Oh, no, of course…by all means.” Jae smiles awkwardly.

“It’ll only take a minute.” Jiyong links his arm with yours and leads you towards a back hallway.

“Ji…slow down…” You prompt as he all but pushes you into the hall.

Once secluded, he lays into you. “What the fuck are you doing Y/N?”

“Good to see you too Ji…”

He stares back at you. “Are you having fun in your delusional world, playing house with your Korean actor Ken doll?”

You cross your arms, angrily. “I am living my life like he told me to Ji. If you have questions, maybe you should take it up with Seunghyun.” You see Jae searching you out in the crowd.

“Oh trust me, we’ve talked. Plenty.”

“Then you would know that HE made this choice. He’s done with me.”

“That’s not true.” Jiyong shakes his head in disagreement. “Every article released about you two, every tabloid hinting at a wedding or baby is killing him. ”

You look back at him in confusion. “He told me to choose Jae. I was fully prepared to leave but Seunghyun told me not to. He said he was bad for me. That he would just hurt me again and that I had to let him go for good. He ended things, Ji, not me.”

Jiyong stares back at you.

“I know it’s easy for you to blame me and think that I am the reason for all this after everything we have been through but this time I was all in and ready to throw this life away. Seunghyun didn’t give me the option.” You say sternly. “He doesn’t want me, Ji.”

Jiyong’s face falls. “He didn’t mean what he said…he wants to be with you. He’s just too scared to admit it.”

“He’s had a lot of time to step up and be brave.” Jae locks eyes with you across the way and waves. You put on a smile and wave back to the man that is now your future. You then pause, letting your guard down. “I never stopped loving him.” You say, breaking your gaze, returning it to Jiyong. “I love him more than he will ever understand….”

“I know…” he says quietly. “I know he’s still in love with you too… he always will be.” He pauses, then adds, “What if he told you to leave and be with him? That would change things…right?”

You shake your head. “In a perfect world…but we both know he won’t do that. I can’t keep playing this game. Jae is going to be my future now. I am going to marry him and start our life together sooner rather than later. Seunghyun has to live with that. Unfortunately, you are going to have to just pick up the pieces.”

Jiyong looks at you, sorrowfully, and nods, knowing in his heart, it’s done.

“Thank you for a great night G Dragon.” You say before turning away, back to Jae.

———————————-

When May comes all eyes are on Jae. The day of TUDUM is hectic. At the event, Jae is presenting the teaser trailer for his new film and planning to announce his retirement after its release. As a celebration, you scheduled the pick up of the David Hockney piece Seunghyun helped you acquire for that night.

The plan was to hit the red carpet, do pictures and press, enjoy the event, and then head out to pick up the piece around 8pm. Jae was elated when you told him.

“What a coincidence…I have quite the surprise arranged for you tonight as well.” He says into the crook of your neck, his hand sliding up your thigh.

“Control yourself.” You blush. “We are next on the press carpet.”

He doesn’t stop. His hands are all over you for every paparazzi photo. When you get to the press line, every question is the same. Marriage, family, future acting roles…and then Rolling Stone Korea steps in.

“Jae-Joon, you’re at your peak popularity. Your fans look forward to what you have to share with them tonight. But I think they are all wondering if the rumors are true? Is there a little action star on the way for you two?”

Jae, loving the attention, feeds into it, placing his hand just right on your waistline. “It’s all we’ve ever wanted, so only time will tell.” He winks before pulling you away.

“They are going to have a field day with that babe.” You say through laughter as you head towards the other photo-ops.

“Let them talk. We will manifest it together.” He grins.

Seunghyun lingers back in the pressline. You hadn’t noticed he was behind you and had heard the whole exchange. He saw the way Jae held onto you protectively, kissed you, touched you. And now you were…he didn’t want to think about it. He made the choice to let you go. It shouldn’t be surprising to see you moving on. He had no one to be angry with but himself. So he takes a deep breath, and does what he does best. Pretend.

——————————-

Jae leaves you to find the green room space you’ve been assigned backstage. He had his manager track down some boxes of old photos from your apartment back in Seoul so he could find the picture of himself as a kid with the painting. He wanted to bring it for good luck later tonight when the two of you picked up the painting together. You laugh at the thought of his manager lugging boxes of photos into a Netflix event.

“I apologize in advance, there was a mix up and we had to create a shared space for you and Mr. Kim with another actor.” One of the backstage managers tells you as she escorts you down a long hall.

“It’s no problem. Really.” You assure her, reaching the door. “I appreciate all your hard work. Jae and I are easy going, we are happy to share the space.”

“Please let me know if you need anything.” She replies, relieved. “Their segment is one of the first to go on so you’ll have some alone time while they’re on stage. Mr. Kim will be called for when his time arrives.”

You nod graciously and enter the room to find your bags containing your change of clothes for tonight already waiting along with…Seunghyun.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” You say out loud.

“I was just as surprised as you are when they told me.” He says coldly, not looking up from his phone.

He’s wearing sunglasses and a black on black Alexander McQueen suit with star embellishments. He looks…sexy.

You grab a bottle of water from the fridge and take a long drink to distract yourself. “You didn't think to tell them it was a bad idea?”

“They didn’t give me much choice.” He says standing. “You know I prefer not to ruffle feathers if I can help it so I just let it be. I wasn’t aware being in the same room with me would be so triggering for you.”

“It’s not me I’m worried about.” You say approaching him. “A certain Dragon told me not too long ago that you’re the one who can’t handle it.” You say raising your voice.

“I’m not trying to upset you…” He says, his demeanor changing. “I go onstage soon so I’ll be out of your hair.”

You look at him, frustrated, and begin pacing. “Fine. Whatever.”

“Hey…Take a deep breath, sit.” He says gesturing to the couch. “Stress can’t be good for you and the b…” He doesn’t finish the sentence but his gaze settles on your figure.

You instinctively cross your arms over your midsection. “I’m not pregnant, if that’s what you’re insinuating. You of all people shouldn’t believe everything you see or read in the news.”

You note a flood of relief that crosses his face as there is a knock at the door.

“Mr. Choi? You’re on stage in five.” The stage manager calls through the door.

“See? I’m already gone.” He says, hands up, turning towards the door.

“Break a leg.” You tell him, as he turns to leave.

———————————-

When Jae enters a few moments later, he’s carrying a duffle bag and his demeanor has changed drastically from when you left him.

“Aw babe, you couldn’t find the photo?” You ask, disappointed for him.

He tosses the bag into the couch and looks at you. “Oh, no…I found it…along with some other memories I wasn’t aware of. Care to take a look?” He questions, gesturing to the bag.

You walk over, peering inside. What you find is your own box of photos. The one once hidden under your side of the bed. His manager must’ve misunderstood and grabbed both…You didn’t do the best at hiding it honestly. You knew this day would come, you just weren’t expecting the conversation to begin here in LA at TUDUM of all places.

“This is my photo box from when I was with YG.” You say, opening the lid.

“Sure.” He says, firmly. “But I’d say there’s more than just old dance memories in that box. Looks like you and Seunghyun were a lot closer than you initially led on.”

He went through all of them? You think to yourself as you pick up a Polaroid capturing you in Seunghyun’s lap, kissing him passionately, his hand on your hip and your hand buried in his bleached white hair.

“There’s a lot like that. Some are even more provocative. I’d say your relationship was more than a fling. ” He says, his voice laced with anger.

“I never said it was.” You attempt to keep your voice calm. “Those were your words, not mine. I just never really had the chance to…”

“Tell me you were madly in love with him?”

“Jae…some of these were taken over 15 years ago…”

“But this wasn’t.” He says holding the ultrasound photo up at you.

You open your mouth, but you can’t quite find the words to respond.

“Do you have a secret love child out there that I don’t know about? God, Y/N this is…a big thing to keep from me for so long…” He says, frustrated. “You hid a pregnancy from me…”

“I…I found out I was pregnant in 2019.”

Jae looks at the photo and back at you. “By whom? A one night stand? Tell me it was a stupid mistake.”

You look back at him, silent.

“If that baby was his Y/N…it changes everything. Tell me the baby wasn’t his Y/N…Tell me!!!”

Seunghyun returns from his Squid Game segment just as Jae’s voice intensifies.

“Oh great! This is perfect timing.” Jae’s laugh is unsettling as he turns to Seunghyun. “Maybe you can shed some light on this situation. Does this look familiar?” Jae asks, holding up the ultrasound photo. “Did you knock her up? Was this yours?” He prods.

Seunghyun winces at his words but does his best to maintain his cool. “Jae, you need to calm down. We are all adults here, we can talk about this calmly.”

“Fuck! Your expression tells me all I need to know.” Jae groans in frustration as he shifts his focus between you and Seunghyun. “So what happened to the baby?” He asks, sticking his finger in Seunghyun’s chest. “Did you make her get an abortion because the infamous TOP from BIGBANG couldn’t handle fatherhood? Didn’t want a baby throwing off your idol success?”

Seunghyun keeps his composure and says nothing, but his eyes are locked on you.

Silent tears stream down your cheeks as you gather the nerve to say your piece. “It was unexpected…but…I…”

“But what? Couldn’t fathom the idea of being a mother?”

“Don’t talk to her like that.” Seunghyun says sternly, coming to your defense, putting a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“You ran from responsibility and gave it up? Or…”

“We lost the baby.” Seunghyun finishes the sentence so you don’t have to. “Is that the answer you wanted to hear? She would’ve been an amazing mother but was robbed of the opportunity. If you would shut up for five minutes then maybe she could explain things to you.”

Jae looks at you, recalling the story shared before. “That story you told me…about your friend…”

“I wasn’t truthful…it happened to me.” You say quietly.

The color drains from his face. “Is this why you recoiled every time I brought up starting a family? Because of the baby you almost had with…him?” He points angrily at Seunghyun.

“Jae…” You sob. “I didn’t know how to tell you…I tried but…”

“You chose to lie instead. God I am so stupid!” He paces. “You’ve always acted strange around him but I just thought it was his idol status influencing you…You still have feelings for him, don’t you?”

You’re silent as Jae continues to berate you.

“You don’t want a family with me…you want one with him!”

“ENOUGH.” Seunghyun erupts. “At the end of the day, she chose you. Are you that insecure of yourself that you can’t move past this? Yes, she withheld this from you but it doesn’t change the fact that she’s WITH you. She chose YOU.”

“The two of you had a whole life together! She’d throw it all away in a heartbeat if you would take her back!” Jae shouts.

Seunghyun looks to you, eyes full of sadness.

“Tell me I’m wrong.” Jae exclaims. “Tell me I’m overreacting and paranoid. That you want a family with me. Tell me he’ll never cross your mind ever again and I’ll let all of this go. Make your choice, him or me.”

You sink to the floor where the box of photos has tumbled to the ground. The memories of a life that left you feeling fulfilled with the man you truly love are spread out before you.

“I would choose him.” You say looking up through your tears. “I would choose him a hundred times over.”

Seunghyun stands still, absorbing your words as Jae clears his throat and straightens his suit.

“I thought you might say that…”

“I tried Jae…”

“You did a great job pretending…wasting 4 years of my life.” He exhales, gathering his things. “You know…I was going to propose to you tonight. Everything was falling into place. The marriage you told me you wanted, our kids, the house in Jeju…all the stories you told me to keep hanging on. I was going to make it a reality.”

“I’m sorry…I can’t keep pretending anymore…”

“No, not that he’s here now.” He says, patting Seunghyun on the back as he approaches the door. “So thanks for setting up this acquisition for her Seunghyun, in hindsight, I guess that painting saved me from living a life of lies.”

Seunghyun crouches beside you and begins picking up the photos.

“I am going on stage soon. I’m sticking to my plan. I will announce my retirement. My life will stay on course, yours no longer concerns me. I need you gone, Y/N. Go back to Seoul and pack your things. We are done.” His voice lacking any emotion.

“But your painting…it belongs to you now.”

“They can keep it. I don’t want to remember this night.” He exhales as he stops at the door before turning to face you. “You’ve ruined that memory for me along with so many others. I’d prefer to forget you completely. This conversation is over.” He then leaves, slamming the door behind him.

———————————————————————————-

Master List

CH 6

By the time Zero Coke begins you realize you dissociated through all of Ovaya, or perhaps hearing it tucked you farther into the recesses of your memories.

A waiter carrying food crosses your path. You grab a bite and settle in a corner to reflect. Your heart aches as you hear Seunghyun’s haunting voice singing “ I need somebody. I really need somebody…”

At the end of 2024 you needed somebody too…and you thought that somebody was Seunghyun. The song shifts and the chaos of ADHD begins…

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Despite having his number after your meeting, the two of you remained radio silent with one another. Which was good, considering you had developed a growing doubt in the pit of your stomach that was telling you to run back to him. You were able to ignore it for a while but by the middle of 2024, it was exacerbated.

You and Jae had been having frequent arguments over your future. His longing to be a father was now a topic of daily conversation and you were having trouble coming up with new ways to deflect.

“We aren’t even married Jae.” You sigh in an attempt to reset him.

“I didn’t know you were so traditional…” He dramatically gets down on one knee. “Y/N I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?”

You roll your eyes. “I am serious Jae. Children are a big step and you can’t even commit to marriage.”

“I have a ring…I’m just waiting for the right time. You know this.” He says, pulling you down to the floor with him and into a kiss.

”Two kids into our relationship is not the right time, babe.” You grin against him.

“Okay, Okay…I’ll work on it.” He says kissing you.

“But we can keep trying…” He says seductively, grabbing your ass.

You told him at your last yearly check up that you’d had your IUD removed. But in reality, you’d had it replaced. You were three months in and assumed you had up to a year before he started questioning. By then I’ll feel more secure and change my mind, you’d told yourself.

In the fall, Jae became obsessed with owning a certain David Hockney painting he had seen in a museum as a child. He began telling you about having his picture made with it and feeling this overwhelming sense of need to own it. He had reached out to Seunghyun’s manager about it in hopes he could point him in the direction of tracking it down but never got a response. So naturally, he asked if you could reach out to him.

You did and got a response immediately. Jae was ecstatic, when he found out that you were meeting with Seunghyun about it. If the meeting was successful, you had decided you would keep the piece a secret, telling him the deal fell through. If you could track it down and purchase it for him as a surprise, it would be more meaningful. When you met Seunghyun at his apartment that’s when everything changed.

The meeting began as normal, sitting in the dining room, Seunghyun showing you the art dealer connection he had and walking you through the steps of reaching out and setting up a sale. He was the perfect gentleman, offering to assist you every step of the way. The painting was in LA, which was convenient as Jae’s new movie would be filming there into late 2025. The plan was made, all that you needed to do was set up some meetings, have conversation, and pay for the artwork. What threw a wrench in the plan was the amount of wine you injested during your time together.

As you stand to leave, you realize you're drunk.

“I think you need to sit down.” Seunghyun laughs, leading you to his couch. “I can drink an entire bottle of wine with no repercussions, but you…not so much.”

You squeeze your eyes closed tightly. “I haven’t had alcohol in a while so that probably has something to do with it.”

He looks to you with his brow raised, “You and Jae are…”

You shake your head, which makes you dizzy. “It’s a long story…but he thinks we are. I’m not there…”

”Oh…”

You rest your head on his shoulder as you try to get a hold of the spinning room.

”You okay?” He asks tilting your chin up to him.

“Yeah…” Is all you can manage before you lean up and kiss him.

He doesn’t move at first, but right as you go to pull away his hand cups your face, holding you still. You part your lips inviting his tongue to explore. A small moan escapes your lips as he pulls you into his lap.

Your hands find his fading lavender hair, threading your fingers through it. His kiss is hot, needy and you had forgotten how much you missed it.

You feel him harden under you as you break away to catch your breath, your hands on either side of his face, awaiting the next move.

“You have to go.” He says, suddenly helping you stand.

Both your breaths are labored, your lips pink as you register what you’ve done.

“I’m calling you a car.”

He walks you down, opening the door for you.

“I appreciate your help.” You say, both of you refusing to acknowledge what just happened.

He nods quickly. “Yeah, anytime.”

When you get back home you take a cold shower in hopes of resetting your brain and body. But that encounter awoke something within you that Jae can’t tame. The next week, Jae began work in LA with you planning to visit him for the holidays and to stay a few months into the new year.

One night you can’t sleep so you decide to text Seunghyun.

Can’t sleep…meet at our spot for a smoke?

You didn’t have an ulterior motive initially, just two old friends battling insomnia and meeting for a late night smoke break in the park. Somehow, one thing leads to another and suddenly you’re on your knees in the park bathroom, Seunghyun’s hand tangled in your hair, his back bracing the stall.

You take him to your mouth as his hand finds its way to your hair.

“We shouldn’t be doing this…” He groans.

You feel him push back in an attempt to resist temptation when you flatten your tongue and take him fully.

“Fuck, Y/N.” He groans as you work your magic.

You recall Seunghyun always being a big fan of your work. You smile to yourself as his grip intensifies.

“You let Jae fuck that pretty little mouth of yours like this?” He moans, thrusting towards the back of your throat.

You pull away looking up at him. “Never, only you.” You say seductively before taking him back into your mouth, swirling your tongue while your hand continues stroking him.

He thrusts into your mouth again, this time allowing him to continue as you grip his thighs.

He holds your head still as he releases down the back of your throat. You swallow then stand to face him.

His eyes are half lidded and he’s breathing heavily. “God you’re good at that…” he sighs, kissing you.

“I leave for California next week.” You say, pulling him out of the stall, lighting a cigarette.

”Can I see you one more time before you go?” Seunghyun asks, nervously.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

Two days before you’re set to leave you meet Seugnhyun at his studio.

You knock cautiously and after a beat, Seunghyun is standing in the doorway, oversized hoodie, sweatpants, glasses, his hair disheveled in the way it gets when he’s living in headphones, recording.

”Come in.” He says, stepping out of the threshold. The studio is just as you remember.

“You’re recording an album?” You ask optimistically.

He nods. “I’m working towards getting there. It won’t be released for a while.”

You smile at him. “It’s a long time coming.”

He clears his throat. “I know things between us have been…heated. But I want to be clear, breaking up your relationship is not my intention. It’s probably best if we just end things here and cut off communication when you go to LA.”

You study him momentarily. “Please forgive me for sounding rude, but is that why you asked me here, Tempo? To break off whatever this is? Or did you have something else in mind initially?”

”Touche…” He sighs. “I asked to see you again for selfish reasons that I regret now that you’re here. Sneaking around is not fair to you or Jae…”

”Maybe I am being selfish too…” You exhale, mustering up the courage to make your next move. “But now that I am here, with you, I don’t regret my choice.” You approach him.

He leans against the soundboard, hands propped on either side as if to prevent himself from giving in to temptation.

“Since that first night at the park I haven’t stopped thinking about you…us. What could be…”

He furrows his brow. “Stop.” He declares holding up his hands. “Don’t throw away what you have Y/N. Jae-Joon is good for you…”

”You were good for me once…you could be again.” You toy with the hem of his shirt.

He groans in frustration, running his hand through his hair. “Y/N…I-We can’t…we shouldn’t…” Against his better judgement, his hand finds your waist.

The logical part of your brain has shut down and you're simply following your heart. You pull him into a deep kiss.

He places his hands firmly on your arms, pushing you away from him, but holding you close. ”If we start this, I’m not going to stop.” He whispers, placing his forehead on yours. “I need to know. Is this what you really want?”

“Yes.” You breathe. It’s all he needs before he sweeps you up in his arms and carries you to the oversized couch.

He lays you down carefully, hovering over you. He trails kisses down your neck, stopping to undo your jeans, sliding them off slowly before folding them and placing them on the nearby chair.

“Always a gentleman.” You can’t help but smile as you remove your shirt, tossing it to him.

He blushes, placing your shirt on the back of the chair followed by his own clothing. He returns beside you, his hand tracing every inch of your body as if refamiliarizing himself with it, stopping at your inner thigh.

“Don’t be shy.” You breathe in his ear, your hips raised towards his hand.

He can feel your wetness seeping through the fabric. He teases your entrance a moment before sliding his fingers inside you.

You stifle your gasp, suddenly embarrassed by your desperation.

“Hmmm, does your boyfriend make you this wet?” He prods, inserting a third finger before curling them, hitting the most perfect spot.

“N-no…” You whimper, nails digging into his forearm. Seunghyun has always been good with his hands. So good, you can feel yourself reaching climax in record time, but right as you reach your peak he pulls away, stripping you of your underwear.

“I want to make this last.” He says, his head settling between your legs.

“Oh God…” You moan. You quickly remember just how good Seunghyun is at this. Oral wasn’t Jae’s favorite but he would oblige here and there but this…this is pure heaven.

His hands grip your thighs with just the right amount of pressure to hold you in place. “Missed your taste.” He groans as his tongue explores. Your hands find his hair as it takes everything within you to hold still.

“I want…” You gasp as he looks up from between your legs.

“Tell me what you want, Princess.”

Fuck.

You unravel beneath his mouth. Leaving you catching your breath, he stands without your answer and removes his boxers, sliding on a condom.

“You know what I want.” You breathe as he climbs on top of you, positioning himself between your legs.

“Hmmm, but I want to hear you say it.” He grins. “It’s been so long since I’ve heard it.” He adds marking your neck and collarbone, unmoving.

“I want you inside me.” You practically beg as he shifts his weight, aligning himself at your entrance, you vaguely recall the roles being reversed. You held control in the past, but now, you’ll do anything to feel the way you once felt.

He pushes in slowly, then stops, allowing your body time to accommodate his size.

Like muscle memory, you adjust almost immediately and wrap your legs around him, attempting to pull him closer.

“Slow down, I’m not going anywhere.” He smiles, holding your gaze.

After a few seconds you can’t take it anymore. “M-Move…please.” You beg.

“Hmm, I like to hear you beg for it.” He groans.

You stiffen as he bottoms out. He fills you in such a euphoric way they is sends your senses into overdrive.

“You okay?” He pauses, asking genuinely.

“More than okay.” You nod. “I’ve missed this…you.” You whisper as he begins thrusting slow and deep. In this moment you overcome with emotion. The last sexual encounter you had with Seunghyun was chaotic, abrasive. This…this is reminiscent of what once was…

One hand is tangled in the hair at the nape of his neck while the other is laced with his. Your mouth on his hungry, desperate to make up for lost time. Your bodies falling in sync as if they’d never been apart.

“Such a good girl, taking me so well.” He praises as he fucks you harder.

His pace quickens as you feel your second orgasm approaching. “I-I’m…”

“Cum for me, Princess.” He growls, as you both tumble over the edge.

Afterwards, you’re overcome with emotion. Seunghyun pulls you in close, wrapping the two of you in a blanket that was draped across the back of the sofa. You rest your head on his chest as you get lost in thought. Jae…Your life together…cheating…What the fuck am I doing?

As if reading your mind, Seunghyun breaks your thoughts, “We can’t keep doing this…This has to end.”

You look up at him, torn between the old life you so desperately want to return to and the one you know is safe.

”I-I could leave him…” You begin.

“I would never ask you to do that.” He says firmly.

“I don’t know that I can be what he wants.” You feel yourself beginning to spiral. “What if I want you?”

His eyes are sorrowful for a moment and a sense of dread builds inside you. “You’re chasing a relationship we had long ago...”

“He’s going to ask me to marry him, Seunghyun.”

”And you should say yes.” He says seriously. “This is not sustainable. You know that…If you threw away your life with him and I hurt you all over again, I…wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”

You stay silent. He’s right. When you're together its good but when it goes wrong, it goes bad very quickly.

“Jae is the best choice for you. This isn’t reality.” He says, tilting your chin up to him, looking deep into your eyes. “Marry him, have his baby. Stop looking back for me.”

“Then this is really the end?” You search his face for a hint of uncertainty. But instead you're met with stoic honesty.

“Our time is up.” He says quietly.

The two of you stay intertwined for what feels like an eternity. Drifting in and out of sleep and each other’s presence. You wait until the last possible minute to leave for the airport. Through your tears you get dressed and gather your things. Hearing Seunghyun’s words give you the validation you need to make up your mind. You will marry Jae, you will have a family together.

You and Seunghyun will set each other free.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

MASTERLIST