do you think I'm broken?

“Tell me what I can do to help,” Ben said, suddenly standing next to him. Jed didn’t have to say anything, they both knew tonight was going to be weird and Ben had a tendency to try and help even when he didn’t exactly know what to do. It’d gotten them into trouble in the past, but he was working on it.

Jed was grateful they were surrounded by the dark. It worked to hide at least some of the emotions on his face. He was getting better at using his words, but he didn’t even know where to begin here. He didn’t know if he was happy or not. He felt peaceful, but there was a weird nostalgia covering everything too.

“I don’t know,” he decided to be honest about it. “This is not…” He sighed. “I don’t know.”

“You really don’t feel any different?” Ben asked. He was being tentative about it, Jed could tell.

“I feel a lot different, that’s the issue,” he said. “The absence of blinding pain is great, I’m not gonna lie, but also I was kinda… used to it? I don’t know, it doesn’t make much sense.”

“You triggered your curse when you were young, it makes sense that the sudden absence of it is… unsettling, to say the least,” Ben said.

“Yeah…” Jed trailed off. “I really don’t remember the last time I actually looked at a full moon for more than a few seconds. It’s nice.”

Ben didn’t really say anything, just stood next to him, staring outside too. Jed knew he was waiting for him to say something and if he ended up not saying anything that would be okay too. There was really no wrong answer here.

“I miss it,” he said after a few moments. “All of it. I know being a werewolf comes with a lot of baggage, but it’s the only life I've known. And starting again after all these years is throwing me off. I don’t even know who I am. Who I can be right now,” he spoke the words quietly into the night.

“You have the chance to find out,” Ben said. “But... Look, I know I have made mistakes in the past when it came to your curse-”

“I forgave you about that,” Jed cut him off. “Invited you to the party and everything.”

Ben let out a little laugh, casting his eyes downwards for a second. “I am aware,” he said. “What I mean to say is that our curses did not define us. You are still the same person you were, you’re just… Learning to adjust to this new reality.”

“How are you adjusting?” Jed turned to look at him. “Staying alive and in one place for more than a few days? When was the last time that happened?”

“I couldn’t even tell you,” Ben said, staring back at him. “But I could get used to it. And you are trying to avoid the conversation.”

“I’m not trying-” he started to say, but at the sight of Ben’s raised eyebrow he just gave up. “Okay, fine, I am, but in my defense I don’t think this is something I’ll figure out today. It’s just this night. It makes everything real. I’m really not a werewolf anymore.”

“Well, from what I understand, the gene is still there…”

“I’m also not really planning on killing anyone though…”

“Unfortunate choice of words on my part, I apologize,” Ben said, making him smile. “If you don’t feel ready to leave yet though there is time. No one’s chasing anyone anymore.”

“I don’t think I can figure out what this means for me here,” Jed said with a sigh. “It’s not like I could stay at the school forever. It is supposed to prepare us for the outside world. Not to mention I don’t think there’s really a place for me here right now.”

“There will always be a place for you here, you know that,” Ben said. “I’ve been here for a few weeks and I know that.”

“Maybe,” Jed relented. “But I still feel there’s so much to do out there. Also this really hot dude said he’d come with me and that can’t hurt.”

“Hm, for the record I think that ‘hot dude’ would follow you anywhere.” Ben gave him a grin. Jed wasn't ashamed to admit he found it utterly endearing whenever Ben tried to use expressions like this.

“Lucky me,” he said before leaning in to kiss him. The rain kept pouring outside, the full moon gleaming in the sky and Jed was still… Jed.

They pulled back, their foreheads still touching, their faces barely illuminated in the dark of the room. It was quiet. It was nice.

“We can figure this out together.” Ben’s words were whispered, but powerful enough.

Jed had really been through a lot, not to mention they’d just beaten the gods only days ago. They had a pretty good track record so far.