Bitshou'

I realized that if I’m going to keep a public diary then I can’t really address it to anyone. That would be an open letter…

“This Is Why” has been out for a few months now. It seems like people are into it, which is such a relief. I know there will always be folks that don’t love it when we switch up the sound on them but I try to believe that anyone who doesn’t get it now will find it when they’re meant to. We’re dropping another song soon and I’m starting to feel like a volcano ready to blow. It’s only a single piece of the whole picture but hopefully, “The News,” is going to give a little more context to the meaning behind “This Is Why”.

We’re all back home now. Tonight I’m propped up with a neck massager thing trying to convince myself that it’s a holiday. My 4-foot aluminum tree is calling out to me from the garage. I really should turn my mind off— No thinking about Paramore or work past 6pm! Well, technically, this journal is a Paramore thing…But I shouldn’t think about it like that or it’ll defeat the whole purpose of publishing a personal diary altogether.…But if it’s a *personal* diary, then why are you writing about work?

Siri, call my therapist.

…

Anyway…

Other than a couple pinched nerves, I’m feeling nothing but gratitude for the shows we just played. There were so many nights we walked off stage gushing about how loud, how beautiful, or how joyful the crowd was. There were so many new faces to meet and so many familiar ones to reconnect with. A few of those shows really felt like some of our earliest headliners and I can’t really explain or understand that. I don’t need to. The point is, there has never been a better picture of how ridiculous this all is. Taylor, Zac, and I are living in a recurring state of disbelief. The gift people don’t know they give us by supporting our band is the gift of a common focus, to channel every kind of energy and emotion. The band is where we know we can come to sort shit out. I’m actually not sure if I’ve ever thought about it like this. Zac and I may have never been given the opportunity to become close friends again had Paramore not been a beautiful distraction from the relative awkwardness. Taylor and I could’ve taken completely different paths had the band not provided purpose when the rest of life seemed so pointless. Everybody needs that thing, whatever it is. I think I always knew mine would have something to do with music but I never imagined I would also get a whole family out of it.

Today it rained like crazy and I was walking Alf when the worst of it hit. It felt really fucking good. There was a drought the entire time we were recording in Los Angeles. That was just one of a thousand extremely sad and thoroughly haunting news stories to wake up to every day. Lately, I light up at the thought of a gray, dreary day. If the forecast calls for rain I’m Drew Barrymore.

Googling “what’s the right way to sign off in a diary?”

…

hearts are breaking, wars are raging on / and i have taken my glasses off

ROSE-COLORED BOY / PARAMORE toronto, canada | nov. 7th

MISERY BUSINESS paramore | when we were young festival, oct. 29th

(x)

+ bonus:

taylor “dressed” as hayley for halloween 2022

PARAMORE LA, ca | oct. 31st

#it’s the bloody knife on the mic stand for me

PARAMORE | TOLD YOU SO LA, ca | oct. 31st

#happy fucking paraween!!! 🎃

PARAMORE LA, ca | oct. 31st

“But fundamentally, when Rhaenyra realises Daemon was never taught the prophecy, she suddenly gains legitimacy. Because she understands that it was her, she was chosen for this.” — Emma D’arcy