this is the 7th time tumblr has broken my theme

tumblr users are like "thought crimes arent real" and then describe a publicly observable action

Actually if you look at his username you’ll see he’s played at least one other game

i think "turning into a pumpkin" is my new favorite way to articulate the state of things when I am at a function and very overstimulated and it feels like my brain is melting. it's like no i can't be a person anymore i have to leave i'm turning into the pumpkin. the time is up yeah i gotta go. yeah see u later. pumpkin time.

Not that there's anything wrong with having something wrong with you

it's such bs that the whole guilt-ridden stoic self-sacrificing martyr thing doesn't work outside of fiction. repressing all your emotions and neglecting your physical wellbeing should make you god's most tragically beautiful morally unassailable little soldier of righteousness but all it does is give you bad skin and gastrointestinal problems

like what do you MEAN the number 1 sexiest character trait of all time is just kind of offputting and bad for you in real life. next you'll tell me smoking has consequences other than looking like a mysterious badass

if i see a group of men laughing i just know its not funny

You know that thing would eat you if you died, right? *pointing to the false image of you that others perceive*

last guy to fuck with me got the shrink ray. still got him in my front pocket just to hear his screams. feed him one cheerio a week

You need to give him an orange slice or something too else he'll develop scurvy

what can i say, i love to watch em wither