r u a genre bending 90s soap drama written n dritected by david lynch and mark frost cos twin youar peak

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It is so, so fucking vital to your health and safety to be in cahoots with at least one person at all times.

[about to give you head] [doesn't know how to talk dirty at all] umm the huge cock store called they said they want this back

we should redefine straight and gay to refer to the aesthetic of a couple instead of their actual gender pairing. bear x femboy you’re straight rip, butch x fem lesbians are straight too. but if you’re a guy dating a girl and you’re a little cute with it and you get pegged ur fucking gay bro i’m sorry. i’m hoping this will make everyone angry in an unproductive way

Both are true

Passenger princesses should be allowed to jack off on long drives, but apparently thats "distracting" 🙄

it's awesome when your friends have pets bc you get, like. a Miniature Bonus Friend. it's like getting fries with your sandwich

this has literally happened to me before 😭 i got fallen asleep on

I can make girls cum really quickly cause I beat every level in flow, and by that you might think I mean my fingers were developed by flow and I can finger really well, no I just tell them I beat every level in flow and they get really turned on. Also while I've beaten a lot of flow levels I haven't actually beaten all of them I just thought of this post while playing flow.

@mullet-man05

This is real it happened to me

Bringing this back in celebration of you beating them all 🎉 now it’s real

So true it is real! All I have to do is whip out my flow free app and show them that I've beat 12500 levels and 2500 daily/weekly levels for a total of 15000 flow levels beat in the minimum number of moves and all the chicks just nut instantly and all the dudes too. It's great

Last July, 3 deputies from the Los Angeles Sheriff’s Department confiscated an antique grenade and blew themselves up with. They took a grenade and blew themselves up with it. Just wanted to remind everyone about that incident.