Life Of The Monkey

Every once in a while I get reminded that English is my fourth language

It’s so infuriating that teen smoking rates were at an all time low in the US and we were on track to basically eradicate smoking and nicotine addiction in teens like it was flat out uncool to smoke and then They came out with nicotine injector flash drives that light up and taste like cotton candy. And have lead in them.

tested positive for wanting to be drowned in kisses and affection

these two months of 2024 have been five years respectively

no tags and 200 notes in 1 hr we are fucking going through it this year huh

cannot stop thinking about the french man who during dinner responded to a person asking "should we be naughty and get desert" by pulling a face and going "naughty? it is chocolate, it is not an, uh, threesome"

Both of these

Every single discussion about a good villain/hero dynamic ALWAYS comes back to these two

do you guys wanna see the most perfectest png of my cat

ohhhhhh bubby from orange cats

WHATS HE DOING UP THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE CASUALNESS OF THAT COLLIE SLIPPING RIGHT OUT OF THEIR COLLAR. That dude is a Willing Participant of this walk and by god everyone else is going to follow the RULES.

I’m just saying if Daniel Radcliffe, the literal protagonist of the Harry Potter franchise since the age of ten years old, was able to disavow JK Rowling and move on from the HP universe then actually what the fuck is anyone else’s excuse. There is no one else on the planet who can say their entire childhood was HP more than that guy and he still cared about trans people more than the average tumblr user who says “we’re protesting by making all her characters queer and trans!!” like you can do better. You should do better.

little gay ppl in my phone you’re in my pocket rn next to my boner