lexi

imat prep is moving forward slower than i'd like. this is supposed to be my last biology week. i have so much fun studying anatomy but i fear fun and love for the topics won't be enough. regardless we shall stay positive and keep working for our dreams

on a different note, i drove for the first time in my life!!! the instructor was kind and he told me i did well, i'm especially proud of myself because up until just last year i was too scared to even just sit in the front seat of the car as a passenger..

all recommendations on how to approach the imat prep period are more than welcome!!!!

now all that is left is the spoken portion of the finals next friday, but in the meantime i'll sleep SO many naps and monday will be my bday! last birthday i'll be a teen for idk how to feel about that

also, a struggle i've been encountering is the total and absolute lack of interest i now feel for these topics. every time i study a pedagogical topic or ANY expert's thoughts on it i feel my neurons drying out and atrophying. it feel physically painful because i know in two weeks, when it will all be over, i will be studying bio and chem and stuff i actually feel interested in and passionate about, but until then i am stuck with pedagogical activists and endless boredom.

i've begun reading katabasis by rf kuang and i am loving it until now. also!!! check out my new shoes i am obsessed they were my graduation + bday present!!

i have been trying to lock in as of recently, studying outside, going to the library with my friends, studying in the shade at parks.. the progress has been, frankly, quite marginal. i find myself not caring much about the topics i must study, and my head is already projected towards the IMAT. ugh PLEASE let june be over thx

today's focus sesh was only two hours long because i had my end-of-year dinner w my classmates and all my professors, as well as an afterparty near our school (absolutely terrifying too many people my age) so studying lowkey came second to it all. makeup, hair and fit ate tho so it can be forgiven

today was a pretty deep day for me, i didn't get to study all that much (although i should've), but i did get to journal and really think over my life, my future and my ideas. i find moments like these, when i can just stop and reflect, imagine and fantasise to be incredibly beneficial for me. hoping tomorrow can be more productive than this

i can't believe highschool will be over in 3 days. five whole years ending just like that doesn't seem real in any way

i've totally been mia these days, but they've been so overwhelming i just didn't have anything to post on here that could've been truthful and not me posing as a studious person.. but i am officially done with all my regular high school exams and am about to begin studying for my big bad final on the whole year's syllabus!

it has been a couple of quite overwhelming days where the lock in plan i made was definitely not followed, at all. but i did get to do a bunch of my work during free periods in the school day and had a very productive sesh with bestie @kkhis22 .

today was the first day of my deep lock in period that will last for the next two weeks. i was almost scarily productive today. i did all i needed to do, practiced for my driver's license exam, finally finished the book i was forced to interrupt thanks to school and started another one!!!

this afternoon was just me revising (aka studying) for my last test before the actual finals!!! this last high school year passed by so quickly, and while i am absolutely elated to be done with this and to be finally able to focus on topics that actually fascinate me, these years have been so crucial to the process of building who i am as a person and what i study (hopefully) at uni next year.

thank you so much!!!! i love either flowery or clean cotton/linen scented ones! the one i'm burning rn is rose and bergamot and i recently finished a jasmine one but my favourites are definitely the ones that smell like fresh laundry or just like really clean

i had so much to do i almost feel like i didn't do anything at all. this afternoon passed in a blur of writing and writing and writing some more. but i am finally done with my last essay for this year!!! the joy!!!