Susan: Did you read the whole thing to her over the phone? Ben: Yeah, except she wasn't it. So I read it to the answer phone.

Ben: That's was one hungry caterpillar. And then th caterpillar turned into a moth. Susan: Butterfly. Ben: Same thing. Susan: Maybe in your joyless little world. But for the rest of humanity...

Therapist: Why don't we start with simpler questions - like your names. Ben: Ben and Susan Harper. Susan: No, it's not. Therapist: So, your name is not Susan Harper? Susan: No, Harper is my slave name. I wanted to keep my name at the wedding but a male dominated society insisted I'd change it to Harper.

Ben: You are insane! You never bring me snacks! Susan: Yesterday. (flashback: Susan brings Ben a Glass of Olives to be opened.) Ben: That's not bringing me a snack! Susan: Olives are snack food. Case closed.

Führer vs. Southern Belle

Führer vs. Southern Belle

Ben: Sorry, what's so funny? Susan: Where you chose to sit. The bean bag symbolises your frustrated inner child. Ben: It symbolises, it's closest to the door. Susan: Could you explain to him that everybody choice in here symbolises a subconscious desire? Therapist: That's my chair. Susan: Ah.

Therapist: Don't worry, Mr. Harper, the first step is always the hardest. Ben: No, it isn't. I find the first step is only the warm-up to the indignities of step two and doesn't Even come close to preparing you for the hell of steps three and beyond. Therapist: You have a very negative view of therapy. Ben: No, life.

Susan: I paid for this therapy. And I'm not prepared to waste it. It would be like cooking a whole meal and then immediately dipping it into the bin. Ben: That's not a waste. That's a reprieve.

a parental haiku by Ben Harper

Ben: Don't look! Susan: Where? Where? Ben: What part of 'don't look' did you confuse with 'look'. Susan: I have to see what not to look at, don't I? Otherwise I might I look by mistake and destroy your whole life. Ben: It's a former patient I don't want to talk to. Susan: You have to narrow it down a bit.

Susan: What Michael says and what Michael means are two completely different things. Ben: Yeah, he gets that from his mother's side.