Where my freaks at?
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@lemongrab-fan
Where my freaks at?

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Matthew Lillard and Angelina Jolie as “Cereal Killer” and “Acid Burn” in Hackers (1995)
previously unseen genders in human history
I wish all the pee came out in one go like a shotgun blast
you just dont get this on other websites
I mostly post the good things about having a kid but god damn this fucking sucks he won’t stop crying and begging for the fart gun from despicable me because he saw it at the store and now saw it on the movie. I’m going insane but I understand he’s very emotional right now. Still though why are kids so annoying sometimes, he’s not normally like this with random shit he sees at the store.

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In the future, children will think our ways are strange. "Why do old people always grow so much milkweed in their gardens?" they'll say. "Why do old people always write down when the first bees and butterflies show up? Why do old people hate lawn grass so much? Why do old people like to sit outside and watch bees?"
We will try to explain to them that when we were young, most people's yards were almost entirely short grass with barely any flowers at all, and it was so commonplace to spray poisons to kill insects and weeds that it was feared monarch butterflies and American bumblebees would soon go extinct. We will show them pictures of sidewalks, shops, and houses surrounded by empty grass without any flowers or vegetables and they will stare at them like we stared at pictures of grimy children working in coal mines
We will be feeding our grandchildren strawberries and raspberries we grew in our gardens, dragging them along to the farmers' markets for tomatoes and eggs and goats milk and pickles and pecans and salsa and sunflower seed butter and jars of honey, as they complain and drag their feet because Gramma always stands around talking to people for like an HOUR
and we will say "When I was YOUR age, fruits and vegetables came from a supermarket and they were bred to get shipped 1000 miles in a truck and sit on shelves for weeks, and they tasted so sour and watery it was like eating paper compared to these ones. It wasn't even legal in some places to grow your own food"
and they will roll their eyes like yeah yeah just because everything was miserable in the 20s doesn't mean I have to have a smile on my face standing in the hot sun while you listen to that one guy talk about his bees FOREVER
But they will go, because there might be baby goats.
Since I made this post, dozens and dozens of people have left tags telling me that it was the first thing today that made them want to continue living, that it was the first thing that made them consider that they might be okay years in the future, that they might grow old, that it was the first and only post of its kind they'd ever seen—the first post that boldly predicts a future where we make it.
And many other people have been just spitting, foaming at the mouth fucking FURIOUS. How dare I have the audacity to imagine a future where things get better?
Don't I know how BAD things are? Am I not aware of the TERROR and DEVASTATION of climate change and fascism and biodiversity loss? How dare someone be so bold, so callous, as to imagine something other than misery and suicide. How dare someone suggest it will get better. How dare a person propose that there is a future where we will be okay, in the face of so much terror. Hasn't she seen the abyss opening its jaws before us?
Well? What do you think?
Do you think I've seen the abyss?
the idea that there is hope for the future is the only way we have this kind of future.
there were kids who stayed inside because of the black plague and went on to help cure it.
there were women who sat at home and cleaned the house and dreamt up a world where they could vote and have jobs.
there were kids in the mines who thought up a life outside of it. there were children who hid in annexes and wrote a diary where they prayed for a future without a terrible man in control
there were slaves who wanted freedom so badly and had hope that it would get better
there were gay people who hid in the corners of clubs and fought back for a future where they could walk down the street together
do you know what all of that has in common? they had hope that things would get better and they made that change. they looked at the world in its cruel ways and fought back.
so now, there are kids and teenagers and young adults and new adults who dream of a world so beautiful and the only amazon their grandchildren know is the rainforest
and it is in everything we do that we find this hope. wishing on dandelions, counting the stars, making our own clothes out of crochet or knit or sewing it, watching the sunset, going to the farmer’s market, feeding the birds, planting seeds.
step by step, we dream up, like our ancestors before us, a beautiful world
I'm sorry guys I know no one is going to want to hear this but I just got resuscitated after being dead for 5 minutes and it turns out hazbin hotel is true
Why do people treat near death visions and hallucinations as anything other than identical to dreaming?
I know some people take even dreams seriously, but it concerns me when I think about how people believe near-death or short-death experiences are somehow different or more true??
honestly an incredibly disrespectful and tasteless comment to make on my post about my very real experience of dying and going to hazbin hotel
*Valley Girl voice*: I must, like, not fear. Fear is literally the mind-killer. Like it’s basically the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will totally face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me, and? When it’s gone? I’m gonna like turn the inner eye to see its path! Where the fear has gone there will be literally nothing. Only I will remain.
Me: my weight fluctuating is totally morally neutral. I don’t need to dedicate large portions of time to gaining or losing weight because my weight doesn’t define me. As long as I eat nutritious food and get in some movement, my weight isn’t important :)
Also me: my fouckingPAMNTS
Me: yayyy buying sustainable clothes that will be in wearable for a long time and not resorting to fast fashion :)
Me when I shift two sizes by the following year: :,( m y… fouking panms
My husband has lost over 20lbs due to chemo and I’ve gained almost that much because I became much more sedentary when he was ill and needed me around. Both of us are experiencing our fouckimn pamts right now — he punched a new hole in his belt and he still can’t keep his work pants up, meanwhile I’ve been living in elastic waistbands so I can breathe.

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tagging/content warning systems for media are often mocked outside of fanfic which is kind of too bad because i do think it'd be a really interesting vector of literary analysis to examine what the author or publisher thinks they should be informing their audience about vs. the actual content of the media in question
tagging my work devoid of any explicit sexual content as "dubcon" and sitting back to watch people fight over what i could have meant by this like i'm a roman emperor watching gladiators being devoured by lions in the coliseum
Everyone's Friend
Tonight on Game Changer:
The world's most insane game of telephone featuring six comedians, three artists, and a PA with the temperament of a shaking chihuahua being held at gunpoint
I almost forgot to mention: this woman came into the penguin enclosure with a KESTREL??? I said “oh my god is that an American Kestrel?” and she said “Yes! She was outside doing raptor education for the kids, but she doesn’t like to get rained on.”
#she was watching the penguins with what I will anthropomorphically project as skepticism
kestrel: i hate rained on!!
human: here is birds in water
kestrel: ......no.....
so this guy right he makes ancient egyptian themed furry costumes. he makes all kinds but mostly he specializes in Horus heads. it's his passion really. he loves to make the beautiful falcon head of the Sun God. anyway so he's at a con one day and he sees this whole bunch of people in middle kingdom dress with these indistinguishable animal heads. he's like. oh man these folks could really use a new source, i can hardly tell what animal those are! so he goes over and he says "hey guys! i see you are into ancient egyptian mythological themed furry costumes--if any of you are interested in being the radiant Son of Ra, I am the BEST in the business!"
and the group of people look at each other, then at him. awkward. finally one of them says: "uh. no thanks. we're all Set."
This has been sent to me four times today, so I'm condemning OP to be judged by the 42 and fall into Nuun.
I think every laugh will make OP’s heart a bit lighter.
@thatlittleegyptologist
Judge OP’s heart
I laughed, I lighten his heart.
His heart shall be heavier for this.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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