How to show up for someone who is hurting:
Make them a playlist or CD.
Pack the kid’s lunches for the week.
Show up in your pajamas and take them for a ride in the car just as they are.
Leave ice cream on their porch with a notification text.
Gently guide them into the sun or into the woods for free, outdoor therapy.
Send them non perishable snacks.
Send them tacos. Always tacos.
Clean out their fridge and freezer since they are usually overflowing with food, or going bad.
Give them a living plant.
Present them with a soft blanket.
Provide support and love for the caregiver.
Give them a pretty, brightly painted rock.
Send them a text with, “Coffee at the backdoor!”
Sit in the waiting room when they’re at the doctor’s or hospital, even though they might not see you.
Tell them how wonderful they are, looking deep into their eyes.
Write their lost love one’s name on something. Engrave it on a necklace. Write it in the sand.
Watch a movie with them, while curled up on the couch in silence.
Take their laundry home and return it, clean and folded.
Tuck money into an envelope and leave it for them as a surprise.
Host them at your house (a way for them to get out while staying in).
If you know them well, help them into the shower or bath.
Run an errand for them, picking up meds, paper towels dry cleaning.
Replace staple food items like milk or coffee.
Put food in their mouth. Sit next to them and gently feed them.
Invite them to a dinner out with friends. Something fun; normalcy!
Choose and appropriate moment to talk about yourself and help lift the weight of their current reality and distract them from the intensity of their situation.
Give the a vase of wildflowers.
Present them with lovely printed photographs.
Send them a card in the mail.
Provide them with art supplies.
Take their kids to the park.
Lie with them until they fall asleep.
Take them to get their hair done.
Send them daily texts simply saying, “I’m here. Checking in.” without expecting anything in return.
Put your hands on their back, not saying a thing.
Cry with them, not saying a thing.
Do something creative with them.
Show up and clean their toilet- clean anything.
Read them poetry, verses, or a favorite book.
Speak the name of the person they are mourning.
Set reminders to remember the anniversary of an event that’s meaningful to them.
Show up days, weeks, months, and years after everyone else stops.
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