'cause i'm a little unsteady

          relationships were complicated and miho knew that the time would come where the conversation was going to need to happen. it was going to be a learning process, but with seoyeon she was willing to go through the up and downs of a relationship. she was the only girl that made that thought even cross her mind. it was a weird feeling, but she liked it. no matter how much she vowed that relationships weren’t what she wanted, she wanted that with seoyeon deep down in her heart. “do you love me ??” miho asked rhetorically. she already knew the answer was ‘as a friend’ and she was okay with that. miho didn’t expect her to love her the way that she did. she was in a relationship and if she did love her, she would’ve left by now. dwelling on that factor wasn’t something that miho wanted to do at all. she wanted to focus on the two of them, not the two of them plus her unwanted baggage. “i know. i guess, you’re amazing too, lee.” miho gave her a knowing smile, pressing her lips against her cheek gently. the girl was more than amazing and sometimes she wished she could express every single day. there was just that something special about seoyeon that miho fell in love with and she wouldn’t have it any other way.

“yeah, still not doing it. especially since you’re gonna record. i refuse. especially since it could easily get into the wrong hands.” miho retorted, standing her ground. she was way too stubborn to give in to this. even if it was in front of her best friend, miho was not going to embarrass herself. maybe if she was drunk she would be easier to convince. but right now ?? impossible. “i could if i wanted to.” miho bluffed, knowing that the only way for that to happen was if seoyeon pissed her off beyond repair. seoyeon wasn’t even the type to upset someone on purpose, so a good blocking wasn’t in her cards. they were too close to get into fights that lasted longer than a few minutes. that would probably shift once they got into a relationship, but they would cross that bridge when they got there.

“there you go with the fucking dramatics. you should really consider taking up theatre.” miho couldn’t help but chuckle a bit at her words. it was seoyeon indeed. the fear of heights has been something they went back and forth about since they were little and each time miho would tease her about how much of a chicken she was. miho’s eyes slowly formed a smile to match the one of her lips as seoyeon spoke about their complicated communication skills as children. miho really had seoyeon to thank when it came to learning english. coming to a new country at a young age and not knowing a lick of english really set miho back, but seoyeon was with her every step of the way. regardless of her feelings towards seoyeon, it was fate that brought them together and kept them by each other’s side. “if you trust me, trust that i will never let anything happen to you. you’re not gonna fall out of the ride. even if you do, i will be sure to jump out and pull some fucking wonder woman shit.” miho joked, trying to make light of the situation so that seoyeon would relax. “okay ??” she concluded, pressing a soft kiss on her lips again. “ew, that makes it sound like i’m so fucking old. don’t do that.” miho pouted, nodding at the question that followed. “the ferris wheel will be our last thing. the sun is setting so it’s the perfect time. i think you’ll love it.” miho replied as a mischievous smile lingered on her lips.

 “you know i love you.” it wasn’t exactly how miho would have wanted, but it was obvious to someone who knew her more than seoyeon knew herself, that she would fall pretty damn quickly. “--but i’m already so excited to fall in love with you.. i already know it’s happening.” she admitted. it was easy to be honest with her -- that’s what they had done all their lives. there wasn’t many secrets between them, so she certainly didn’t feel too shy to admit something that miho deserved to hear. she wanted to tell her constantly that she did feel something, that miho didn’t need to worry at all.. but she knew her words could only do so much. it was fine now when miho was giving her the time of day and was actually happy, but what would happen later? she didn’t know, but she wasn’t looking forward to it if she didn’t get her act together with her boyfriend. there was a sense of pride in knowing that she was the only one that miho was putting in so much effort for. that was what was making her fall for the girl so quickly and it was so, so easy. 

  “baby.. i would do it for you!!” and she knew she’d be even more ridiculous than miho. seoyeon may have been able to carry a tune, and she could work wonders on a piano, but dancing was a whole different animal to her. she gave up almost instantly though considering she was very aware how stubborn miho actually was, and instead, leaned over to place a quick kiss against her head. there was no point in going on about it when she knew that miho would never give in. but she’d eventually get her to dance to that song, that was for sure.

          miho noticed the reaction to the two words she slipped in at the end of her statement, pressing her lips together to stop herself from grinning. it was cute how shy seoyeon got. especially since her cheeks were completely flushed. the question that was posed about her ever having a girlfriend instantly made miho chuckle. sure, she spent a little more time on certain girls than others, but a girlfriend ?? it was never in her cards. the aspect of a relationship wasn’t appealing to miho with any of her conquests, so it never really crossed her mind. “yeah, no. i don’t do girlfriends. it’s just not something that i wanted. why should i be tied down just because ??” miho’s shoulders automatically shrugged. it was true. the thought of a relationship didn’t come to her attention until now. she wanted to be in a relationship with seoyeon, but she didn’t know how. she didn’t like all the labels and expectations of a relationship, yet she still wanted to call her her girlfriend. she wanted so bad for her to be her girlfriend, but how was that even possible when one of them was still in a relationship and one of them had a relatioship-phobia ?? “just because they like me, doesn’t mean i want them. i get what i want from them and then i’m on to the next. none of them are that special for me to change that. it’s their fault for falling in love with me after getting fucked once.” she rashly spoke. maybe talking about the subject in front of someone she wanted to leave her boyfriend for her wasn’t ideal, but they were friends before anything else, so they could talk about anything. miho was also a piece of work. she had a lot to figure out before getting into a relationship, and they both knew it.

they were definitely opposites when it came to a lot of things. miho was impulsive, while seoyeon was rational. miho was rebellious, while seoyeon was cautious. one could easily say that that’s what made them such good friends. they balanced each other out perfectly and brought things out of the other that normally were never shown. hell, seoyeon was literally stepping out on her relationship with miho. clearly the deviousness that miho possessed was rubbing off on her best friend. “but that’s no fun. someone needs to tell people the truth in the most brutal way possible. everybody needs a simon and right now that just so happens to be me.” 

“for one, i don’t dance. you know this. for two, that would be fucking embarrassing. i know you will record and post it. which will end up in me blocking you for the rest of the year and never speaking to you again.” miho grumbled.through a laugh that seeped through her attempt at a straight face. only they would be able to joke about something so random. it was refreshing and one of the things she loved most about their friendship. “recreate what ?? absolutely not, nope.” she spoke matter of factly. her ears instantly perked up at her next words whilst a knowing grin growing on her face. “if i do it, i’m gonna make you do something ten times worse.”

“god, you’re so dramatic. they even have straps to make sure you don’t fly out. stop being a baby.” miho teased, knowing all too well how much seoyeon disliked heights. it was cute to see her freak out, knowing that miho would never let anything happen to her whatsoever. “relax, it’s going to be fine.” miho reassured her before she turned seoyeon’s head towards her gently by her chin and planting a soft kiss against her lips. “plus, i will make sure nothing happens to you.” she continued with her eyes fixated on her. “you believe me, right ??” she questioned softly. the last thing she needed was for seoyeon to go into panic mode. she needed her to be as calm as possible before, on the way to, and during the ferris wheel ride. because if she wasn’t, miho was probably going to be in her own head about what she had planned. “we are literally a few months apart. if i’m old, what are you ?? an infant ??” miho retorted with a soft chuckle, taking a bite of the chili dog.

 she definitely understood the whole not wanting to get in a relationship thing, hell that had been seoyeon up until she was seventeen and started talking more and more to doyoung. she would have 100% been on her side -- what was the point in a boyfriend or girlfriend? she certainly had a number of reasons why they were great, and even if she wanted to subtly hint at it and potentially get her excited for them being in an eventual relationship, she knew she couldn’t dance around it because of how she was still with someone. all her experience came from doyoung himself and seoyeon knew better than to mention the boy considering miho wasn’t his biggest fan. “i don’t think you’re hard to fall in love with though..” she mumbled under her breath, eyes locked on her feet. she wouldn’t go as far to say that she loved miho romantically right now, but she could obviously see the appeal, even if it was after a quick fuck. miho was one of the greatest girls she knew, and the more she was falling for her? she got the appeal. “you’re pretty amazing, ito.”

   “i wouldn’t upload it anywhere if you didn’t want it to be. would i still video it? yeah. i need a good laugh every now and again.” seoyeon teased, her eyes crinkling as she ducked her head. she was going to keep begging and begging, but she knew it would be hard to get anywhere with how stubborn the other could be. it wasn’t something she could compete with. “but you wouldn’t block me. you could try, but you’d miss me too much.” at least she knew if the roles were reversed, she’d never be able to block miho. she needed her too damn much, even if they did have a small argument beforehand. they were the type to fight and text each other minutes later with something completely off-topic. the whole getting into a relationship and romantic part of this was worrisome for her if they ever did fight, but she knew they’d get through it. they always did, not much could keep them apart from each other. especially now.

          “yeah, we’re friends…but more than friends…but still friends.” miho shrugged, know that the word she used was humorous, but it was true. it was a sticky situation. it was something neither of them thought they would be entangled in, yet here they were. miho never fathomed being in this predicament, so what other word was she supposed to use ?? they weren’t dating. they didn’t have a title. as much as she wanted it to be more, what could she do, really ?? miho had to wait for whenever she decided to get out of current relationship to even bring up the topic of them being an item. it wasn’t the best situation, but it was their reality at the moment. “one can only hope.” miho nodded as her lips slowly pursed. her bitterness didn’t last for long as she felt a pair of familiar lips press against her head. her prickly exterior slowly turned to jelly and the thought of them finally being able to call each other ‘girlfriend’ made her smile immediately. “but i want to. you do special things for the special people in your life. you so happen to be that special person. so sit back, relax, and let me do all the work, baby girl.”

“still, i should probably learn how to word what i want to say a little better. i’m fucking aggressive.” she admitted. in miho’s head, her words never came off harsh. maybe it was because she was always told to be honest with what she felt. she had a hard time concealing her feelings and her facial expressions alone could attest to that fact. she didn’t want to hurt seoyeon’s feelings, but if they were going to try to be together at the end of it all, they both needed to be honest. she didn’t know a damn thing about relationships, but she knew they were built around trust, honesty, and communication. seoyeon’s words hit her like a brick. she knew she felt that way and she told her multiple times, but sometimes it didn’t feel like that. in the moment, miho knew that seoyeon was being honest. so, she wasn’t going to hold the prolonging of her leaving her boyfriend against her. still, she could feel her heart racing as the words filled her ears. she needed to hear these words. she needed the reassurance. “i know.” miho let out in a low tone, tucking a piece of her blonde hair behind her ear. “and i believe you. which is why i’m willing to be as patient as possible. you’re the only girl i am willing to wait for.” she responded with a nod. she didn’t know what more she could say in the moment without coming off as either an emotional bitch or a bitter bitch. all she knew was that she was always willing to wait for the girl she was in love with. “i will. when have you known me to have a filter ??”

“oh hell no. that’s not happening whatsoever.” miho shook her head quickly with her eyes shut. “you really thought i was about to do that.” miho mumble under her breath as she continued to dig through her bag seconds before she was interrupted. miho swiftly rolled her eyes as an frustrated sigh escaped her lips. “really ??” she rhetorically asked, relaxing a bit as her lips touched her cheek. she was going to let her pay this time because they really didn’t need some petty argument over who was paying right now. “you’re lucky you’re cute.”

reaching over to grab whatever seoyeon couldn’t hold, miho nodded her head at her suggestion. “as long as no bugs come near us, i’m down.” miho commented once they started to walk in the direction of where they were going to be sitting. the anticipation for the ferris wheel made miho’s heart race, but on the outside she wasn’t going to show that. especially since she wanted things to be a surprise. “stop acting like it’s some type of death trap. you’ll be fine. you’re so dramatic.” miho playfully spoke, taking off her own jacket to lay on the grass for them once she handed off the things in her hand for seoyeon to hold.

  the phrase baby girl made her practically beam, but it was easy to see how embarrassed it also made her as her head ducked almost instantaneously to hide the look on her face, she could feel herself going completely red and it was from two little words from miho. it was complete infatuation, but she wouldn’t mind hearing those words for a long, long time if she was given the chance --- which she knew she was being given. it was up to her to figure the rest of it out because seoyeon had no doubt in her mind that they could work. if kissing for the first time wasn’t weird? it never would get weird. it felt so right, and it was something she wanted to keep doing. “i know you always tell me everything.. but humour me for a sec.” seoyeon started, curling her lips. “you’ve never had a girlfriend? not even a secret one that you didn’t tell your best friend about?” she knew the answer, but she still wanted to know why miho never put herself out there. “you realise you have a huge group of girls who would line up just to go on a date with you?” so it definitely made her feel good knowing that she was her main focus, and the first meaningful date if anything.

   “aggressive is good sometimes.” it certainly balanced things out with seoyeon considering she was a lot more soft spoken and soft in general, in comparison to miho who was rough around the edges. seoyeon never stepped out of the soft, delicate little girl that she once was and she was just as sophisticated and lady-like as her parents had raised her. her being aggressive wasn’t something she possessed and it wasn’t something she had ever felt before. but she felt like she would try her best to fight for miho, she was doing the imaginable after all -- she was cheating on her boyfriend, she was seeing someone else when she obviously shouldn’t have been.. so there was obviously something morally wrong with her, at least that was what she had been taught growing up. she didn’t believe it, but the sentiment was there. “never.” seoyeon answered honestly, her finger darting out to tap at her nose. “and a filter is good sometimes.” she repeated. “we still need to teach you that one, i guess.”

      a pout adorned her lips as she turned to look at miho, practically pleading now. “why not? perform it for me.” she knew she was going to whine all night until she did it for her, “it’s your fault for saying it like that!! now i want to see you get down to some trey songz, fully dancing, fully singing.. fully seducing me.” she could only keep a straight face for so long, quiet chuckles escaping at the thought of it all. it was ridiculous, but when were miho and seoyeon ever serious? there was always some joke between them. “i’ll pull up dance videos later, and you can recreate them.. please? i’ll do whatever you want if you do this for me!!” her eyes rolled as she was called cute, resisting the urge to deny it. she knew that miho would have been annoyed otherwise. 

          it was inevitable with how close they were as children that it would grow into miho falling in love with her best friend once she figured herself out. seoyeon was there with her through every little thing. she was the first person she told when she had her first kiss, crush, and everything else in between. that day just solidified that they were unbreakable. they were not going to leave that establishment until they got matching bears. even though miho would deny all claims of such, that bear was something she cherished. it was something she went back to when she realized that she didn’t just view seoyeon as her best friend. “they can be equally as special. that was a symbol of our friendship and this is a symbol of our…” miho trailed off for a second. she knew that she loved seoyeon, but she didn’t know if it was reciprocated just yet. “…situationship.” it was obvious they had a connection, but she didn’t know if love was the right adjective to use. she still had a boyfriend and if she did love her, that would’ve be the case. miho didn’t dwell too much on that fact because she spent years feeling that way without any ounce of it in return. “but i still want to. i feel like if we are more than just a friendship, my actions should show that i’m serious about you. i wanna see you smile since it’s literally my favorite about you. even if it’s something simple, i still want to do something that we both will remember and look back on when we’re 60. like ‘damn, our first official date was actually cute as fuck,’ y’know ??” 

“wow, my late nights in the gym really paid off. here i thought my membership was useless.” she joked, as a soft smile grew on her lips once she felt the other’s head rest against her shoulder. god, how she sometimes hated being as honest as she was. miho hated how seoyeon’s eyes dropped at her words and the atmosphere slightly shifted. “i didn’t mean to come off as some bitch. i just figured we should at least be honest.” she sighed softly. this whole ordeal wasn’t something that was ideal in miho’s perfect little world. if they were in that world, miho would’ve kicked doyoung to the curb by now. miho sometimes could feel the guilt creeping up on her when her mind would wonder. as much as she couldn’t stand doyoung do to her own jealousy, the last thing she ever wanted was to be a homewrecker. it wasn’t fair to him, yet here she was–courting his girlfriend as if she was single. they had years of history and miho knew seoyeon couldn’t just drop him. even if that was something that she would prefer due to her own selfish reasons. she knew that if this was any other girl, waiting was not an option. hell, no other girl even had the audacity to make her wait. but seoyeon wasn’t just some girl. she was the love of her life. if she had to wait until the end of the world, she probably would. 

“you don’t have to apologize. it’s okay. i’m just as in the wrong. you have a boyfriend, yet i’m playing mrs. steal-your-girl. it’s wrong, but i can’t help that i want you.” miho admitted wholeheartedly. she felt the nudge at her side and let out a small sigh as if she was holding her breath throughout the whole conversation. she didn’t even notice the encounter in front of her as several different through circulated in her head. “um–” miho finally came back down to earth, eyeing the menu quickly. “just a funnel cake and a lemonade.” she replied, looking into her bag to get her card so that she could pay.  

 “situationship.” she repeated with a nod of her head, clearly resisting the urge to just laugh. that was hysterical and certainly one way to put it. it wasn’t like they were dating -- seoyeon was, but not miho. not yet at least. there was a side of her wanting to ask why they couldn’t compare the two --- because seoyeon was looking at miho as the friend she grew up with, not someone who she was only starting to date. to her, they couldn’t be divided up. they weren’t two separate entities. but she did know if things didn’t work out (which she doubted), she’d at least still want her close friendship with miho. nevertheless, she refused to dwell on it. she only wanted to give her hope. “--into an eventual relationship.” she reaffirmed, placing a quick kiss to her head. it was the truth, she did want that. “i know you’re serious about me... about this.” it wasn’t something to joke about with someone who you grew up with and originally thought was just a friend. “but if you’re so sure on doing something special, i’m looking forward to it. just know you really don’t need to go all out for little ol’ me.”

   it wasn’t like she was coming off rudely, because that was exactly how she felt in that moment. so how could seoyeon fault her? she certainly couldn’t. and she wouldn’t. “no.. honest is good. keep being honest, please.” it was how she’d know what was right and wrong between them too -- whilst seoyeon wasn’t a big relationship expert since she had been with one person, she knew miho wasn’t either. it was going to be a whole lot of testing the waters for each other, and she wanted her to vocalise how she felt, even if it would make seoyeon feel horrible about how she was stringing her along. it was the truth after all. “miho..” seoyeon started, clearing her throat as she came to a halt. “i meant what i said. i’ve felt more for you than i have for doyoung in almost four years -- i wish i was lying about that because my heart breaks for him.. but i still want to be selfish and be with someone i really, really like. who better than the girl who has been by my side from the beginning?” it was never something that crossed her mind; being into girls. there was a part of her that questioned it when miho had initially came out, but nothing came of it. although the thought of being with miho made her heart practically soar. she knew she was doing the right thing, even if she was going about it the wrong way. “i may not always like it, but always tell me how you feel. you deserve that from me.”

      there was a small laugh that escaped at her words though, her grin growing as she looked at the girl. “mrs. steal your girl? wow, i’m gonna have to put that on when we get back, and you’re going to have to perform it for me!! that sounds pretty entertaining.” it was the perfect way to describe things. though as soon as miho started looking for her card, seoyeon reached for her hand, an indication of sorts that she’d pay for it and she had nothing to worry about. she could fight seoyeon over it all she wanted, but she was paying this time. almost for extra persuasiveness, she leaned over to kiss her cheek, still holding onto her hand as they waited. it was nice being real, letting herself be loved and show love in turn, and it was obvious with how she was taking advantage of it all.

          miho couldn’t help but ponder for a few seconds before giving a suggestion. her head was telling that she wanted the picture to be on display. she wanted every one to know that her and seoyeon were a thing. it was wrong to be selfish, but miho felt like she had the right to be. hell, she was almost at 90% when it came to cutting off her plethora of sexual conquests. seoyeon was her only focus, even when she would grumble here and there about how much she hated the lack of honesty on seoyeon’s part when it came to herself and doyoung. miho was wrong for still pursuing her, but what was she to do ?? she was already in way too deep and it started way before their lip-locking on new year’s eve. her heart knew that displaying their sticky situation wasn’t the best for either of them. not right now at least. 

“put it inside that one stuffed bear we got at build-a-bear when we were like seven. remember when we wanted matching ones and we waited like thirty minutes for someone to get the one bear you picked because they didn’t have any more out ??” miho reminisced with a warm smile on her lips. outside of her being in love with her best friend, it was things like that that miho would look back at and know that their relationship was way to solid for it to be ruined. “you sound like you belong in one of those fucking romcoms.” miho teased “i’ll try my best to make it perfect.” she added, making another mental note to give her sister a call the next day. she was going to need all the help she could get. 

“nope, because i’ll just toss it off when i want my spot back.” miho retorted playfully. she tried her best to hold back any laughter that was ready to seep out of lips when she saw seoyeon’s face at the mentions of the ferris wheel. “don’t worry. i’ll protect you. you’ll be safe with me.” she reassured, intertwining their fingers together once they unlocked arms and started holding hands. “listen, it was tiring. pretty sure i’m about to get biceps because of it.” she answered dramatically, flexing her free arm. 

miho listened to the other’s words and couldn’t help but bite the inside of her check. she knew they were sincere and she believed them, yet it still kind of stung a little. they were making steps towards their potential future, yet they had to be so far away to do it. it felt stagnant at the same time, but deep down miho knew she wasn’t going to lose hope. no matter how bitter she was. “i do too, even though it would be better if we didn’t have to go to a different city to do all of this.” she spilled out. her words weren’t supposed to come out so blunt, yet they did. a wave of empathy hit her, so she quickly let out a small sigh. “okay, that came out wrong. but, i do hope that someday in the near future we can do all of this in alberta. i know that you don’t mean to string me along and getting rid of that situation probably isn’t the easiest. which is why i’ve been trying to be as patient as possible. i love you and i don’t want to lose you because i wanna be selfish as fuck. that wouldn’t be fair.” miho rambled on as they finally reached the concession stand.

  the memory from their childhood was pretty much hard for her to forget, much like any moment spent with miho was. “we had to have matching ones!!” they had always been inseparable since they had met and seoyeon wanted everything to match with her best friend. she practically had idolized the other girl growing up, but now she was just starting to realise that she liked her in a much different way ever since she was little. the day she had got that bear was the beginning of the bear resting on her bed if she didn’t have someone to cuddle up to -- most of the time it was miho, she was never afraid to admit that because of how comfortable she was around her. “it’s my favourite teddy bear.. but this here might top it.” knowing that this came from the simple fact that miho loved her? she wanted to make sure this new plush was something for most to see, something to hold near and dear to her heart. “it’s true though. nothing’s different about us except for the fact that we kiss and feel a lot more than what typical best friends should.. i don’t need something big, but i still want it to be equally as special for you -- but don’t worry about that. i guess it just means i need to bring you out some other day too... for our second official date.”

   she knew she never had to worry with miho and that she’d totally be safe, so miho’s words were simply like a reassurance to the girl. she knew miho wouldn’t do anything to mess with her when they were in the ferris wheel cart, but she already knew for good measure that she was going to plant herself on the girl’s lap so she couldn’t even think about doing anything. “you’ve already got biceps.. baby biceps. but still biceps.” she grinned, her head moving to rest against her shoulder.  

something as simple as seoyeon keeping a picture of them gave miho the little hope that she need. yes, it was a small gesture, but it was something. she could’ve easily just told her to keep it so that the possibility of someone else finding it was small, but she didn’t. she wanted to keep it even if she had to hide it. it wasn’t the most ideal situation. the sneaking around. the waiting around. the everything. but miho knew that if she waited long enough, they would finally be more than that. no matter how impatient and emotional she was, miho was going to wait for seoyeon. she waited years to even open up her mouth and tell her that she loved. what was a little more waiting anyways ?? “no. i want you to keep it. somewhere special too.” she replied with a smile. miho almost felt a little bad when she questioned what she said, but to her it wasn’t. she didn’t properly ask, nor did she properly plan. this was something that they would do even as friends. they were just kissing and holding hands instead of their normal friendly demeanor. “perfect.” was all she could make out before pressing her lips to the top of seoyeon’s head. on the inside she was sweating bullets. she never went on a proper date, let alone planned one. she clearly had a lot of studying to do, but it was all worth it. 

“i’m glad. it’ll probably take up all the space on your bed, but it’s cute so.” she added. a small chuckle escaping from her lips as her cheek was kissed and seoyeon mentioned how the plush resembled them. with a swift, playful roll of her eyes. miho completed the heart with her. if it was anyone else, miho probably would’ve protested or simply made some annoyed remark. she was doing small things like this without question and that just solidified that seoyeon was her person. everything just came so naturally and it was refreshing to miho. this was something she never thought would be her reality and yet it was. “do you really wanna eat and then go up on the ferris wheel ??” miho teased with a sly look on her face, linking her arms with seoyeon’s, contemplating exactly what she wanted to do. she knew whichever went first, it was going to a memorable ferris wheel ride. “let’s eat first. i burned all my carbs working on my jump shots.” she played along with a grin.

  the smile that spread across her lips was absolutely undeniable. she was practically beaming as she looked at the slightly taller girl, reaching forward to hold onto her hands. it was a step in the right direction at least, because seoyeon could already feel herself falling so hard for her best friend. the what-if factor had always been on her mind when she heard about people falling in love with their best friends, but it hadn’t been until miho admitted that she loved her that she finally stepped up to the plate and decided to give things a try --- turns out she really, really did like her. more than a friend typically should. “have you got any suggestions on where to put it?” she had a few herself; but she at least wanted miho to have some input. somewhere where she could see it and where she wouldn’t have to hide it seemed like the perfect idea, but even she knew there was no chance of that happening without her boyfriend or parents finding it. her nose gently scrunched up at the feeling of the kiss on her head, the happiest look resting on her face. “--just know we could do anything, and i’d be happy.” she knew that miho hadn’t exactly been on a lot of dates and preferred to just sleep around, so this was certainly new territory. “as long as i’m with you, that’ll be the best date ever.”

          “are you really ??” miho questioned with a hint of surprise in her voice. if she were speaking frankly, she wouldn’t have thought seoyeon would be the one keeping that picture. miho knew she would keep it in a safe place, but it was still slightly unbelievable. sneaking around was their full time job. it was a step in the right direction almost. miho still had the distaste of being a second choice in her mouth, but this was reassurance. reassurance that maybe they could be more than just what they were–a dirty little secret. deep down she needed it because she didn’t know how long she was going to be able to stomach pretending that they were just friends. even with the pet name ringing through her ears, miho shook her head with a sheepish smile lacing her lips. the gears in her head slowly started to turn and it was evident that she had concocted something. “i’ll let you pay if you let me take you on a proper date–” she paused for a second for dramatic effect. it wouldn’t be miho is she wasn’t being dramatic. “–back home.” was all she said as she anticipated an answer. 

cockiness and ego aside, miho would’ve continued to play the game just so she could win something for seoyeon. it was one thing to tell her how much she loved her, she needed to show her. if that meant playing some corny game to win her some corny stuffed animal, she was going to do it. hell–she would shout it to the high heavens that she loved her if she could. romance wasn’t something she excelled in because she never really had to be romantic with anyone. she never felt the need to. with seoyeon it was different. she deserved it and she brought that side out of miho. even if she wasn’t quite there yet. miho grinned as she heard the claps and continued as the other was in her arms. “told you. i’m literally fucking micheal jordan.” it felt good to know that she didn’t make a complete ass out of herself and all her boasting didn’t go to waste. she shut her eyes and took the quick kiss attack, beaming from her win. “shhh, i was confident the whole time. i have no idea what you’re talking about.” miho replied, pretending to be as oblivious as ever. miho’s eyebrows reacted way faster than her lips when seoyeon told her she had to pick the stuffed animal. “you’re lucky you’re cute and i love you.” she won it for her, so she didn’t want to have to pick it too. 

miho sighed loudly as she was turned around, making a small mental note in her head. “hm…” she pondered for a few seconds, her brows eyes grazing over her options. she could tell that the worker was probably growing impatient, but she wanted to pick something that was perfect. a bear was too cliche, and she didn’t want to pick something that was weird either. “i want the two big ass flamingos that are making a heart. they’re better than the swans and they’re symbolic. so it’s a fucking win-win.” miho smiled as she took the huge stuffed animal into her arms and passed it to seoyeon. “i hope you like it. because i can switch it if you want ??”

  “mm” was all she could mumble out. it was something she wanted to hold close to herself, because the more the two hung out in a more romantic way, the more she was realising just how much she liked -- no.. loved her. it was so easy when she thought about how miho had been treating her the last few weeks. she had been so patient, had been so loving, and it was more than she had felt for her than the boy in her life for years. it was all just going to be a matter of admitting to herself, and those around her.. and she knew that was going to take awhile. right now? she was content in the little bubble she was in, but she knew miho wasn’t too fond of it, and rightly so. if the roles were reversed, she knew she’d be a little pissed off too. if anything, her wanting to keep the picture was just her trying to tell miho that she was serious about this all, even if it didn’t appear that way all of the time. “unless you really want that picture.. i’ll give you it. but i want to keep it.” to make it an even bigger point, she’d put it in her purse as soon as they got back to their room, just so she knew how serious she was being. the next few words had her brows raising, leaning forward to poke her stomach. “oh, this isn’t a date?!” she feigned hurt, frowning slightly before contemplating her words for a few seconds. she should have been saying no, but when miho was looking at her like that? she couldn’t resist. “fine.. i mean--- yes. you can take me out on a date back home.”