GRIMM SENTENCE STARTERS
âHey! I didnât know you couldnât sing!â
âSorry, guess I should have worn my airbag today.â
âA gift basket would have been nice!â
âI donât need you for what you know, I need your nose!â
âBoy, you really know how to butter a guy up for a favour.â
âDeath by Hokey Pokey.â
âDonât you dare say âheelâ!â
âGood boy.â
âDeath⊠by rat?â
âHow many rats?â
âJust for the record, I didnât actually kill her. She impaled herself.â
âAlligators donât rob houses.â
âNobody was probed⊠yet.â
âOookay, that warrants a âhow the hell did it do thatâ?!â
âWell, when a mommy and daddy love each other very muchâŠâ
âDude, I gotta be honest. Your mother scares the crap outta me.â
âI told you to meet me, not eat me!â
âYour whole face looks like a volcano thatâs about to explode.â
âWhat up, bro?â
âWell, Iâm glad you know how to clock a dude with a brick.â
âAh, just what I need. An entrance to Hell.â
âHe ate a baby. Thatâs rude.â
âDude, join the misunderstood.â
âActually, that was a paraphrase. I left out the bad language because I canât write that fast.â
âI havenât had this much fun since that drunk threw up on me at the Christmas party.â
âSeriously? Thatâs like a beer and half an onion ring.â
âWhat am I? Your personal Wikipedia?â
âI wasnât pissing on the fence for kicks.â
âItâs obvious. It was committed by a barefooted man carrying a wolf.â
âNext time we hire an intern Iâm going to suggest they do a better psych evaluation.â
âMy baking days are overâŠâ
âWoah, hold on. This is one of those âpause, take a deep breathâ situations where you canât be going off half, full, or any other degree of cocked.â
âWeâre supposed to pull out his eye with a spoon?â
âThatâs gotta be uncomfortableâŠâ














