Law School Lemmings

I regret attending law school. I still have nightmares about taking final exams for courses I wasn’t aware I’d ever been enrolled in. I still wish those three years spent earning my degree could be reclaimed; see, the worst part of the law school scam for me wasn’t the financial burden—it was the lost time.

My attempts to escape law during the crash doomed several personal relationships of mine, including my marriage. Seeing someone you once loved use your post law school suffering as a cudgel during divorce settlement negotiations was without question the lowest moment of my life. It was during those hard hours when I realized the soul itself can feel pain.

It felt like this: 

But I survived.

Clocking in at more than two million visits, this blog received messages from law school graduates in crisis with disturbing regularity. And to be frank, I was in that same boat a few times. The shame and psychological isolation, the public’s misinformed belief that the practice of law is lucrative so anyone leaving the industry must be defective in some way cut me to the bone. I began numbing myself through self-medication and emotional detachment to suppress the hostility that was becoming my constant companion. But still I survived.

And so can you.

Now I work in an industry I love on behalf of an organization whose name you wouldn’t believe if I told you who it was. Seriously, you wouldn't. I found at last my little place in the universe and it is far, far away from the legal industry.

I’m quite wealthy now by most measures (>$300,000 salary plus sizable cryptocurrency holdings). But money isn’t happiness; it’s boredom. The novelty it affords becomes stale so quickly that one questions the point of acquiring it in the first place. The fact that my primary motivation to attend law school was to take the “safe” route to a “comfortable” living makes even clearer the folly of my decision to attend.

Law school wasn’t worth it. The wasted years will always be wasted years. The failed relationships will remain failed relationships. I hoped long ago that some of these relationships were salvageable. They weren’t. But you know what was salvageable? Me. There but for the grace of God go I.

Do your damn research on law school. Don’t repeat my mistake when I’ve shown you how to avoid the catastrophe I found myself in one very painful decade or so ago. Love people, not prestige.

I will soon begin mothballing Law School Lemmings posts but the damn research and correspondence pages will remain published as a public resource.

xoxo,

LSL

As a twenty five year attorney, today I am really bummed out. I attended an outdoor festival and as I approached the Walgreens booth, the Pharmacist asked if I wanted a flu shot. I responded, "How much?" He said "free" if you have insurance. I produced my Obama Care bronze level only plan I could afford card. He told me, it didn't look like they accepted my cheap crap high deductible plan. He asked, "what employer would give you such a plan? I told him that I was an underemployed solo.

To continue, the Pharmacist told me that he has a relative who is just like me and that he read about the law profession. He told me to sit down and he will just "give me" the shot and shuffle my paperwork in among the State employees and others with full coverage. I was embarrassed. What the hell happened to my profession? I work my ass off and make no money?

This pretty much speaks for itself. Since the author requested anonymity, I’ve redacted the law school’s name and location. If the author reads this, do let us know if you’d like the school’s name included; otherwise, we’ll try to protect your privacy as much as possible.

Here’s the post:

It’s been awhile since we have had any updates about the XXXXXXX Law School in XXXXXXX, XXXXXXX.  

A quick recap:  XXXXXXX Law School was also denied provisional accreditation following their first application.   In the intervening year, XXXXXXX reluctantly conceded that doing the minimum required by the ABA was, in fact, necessary and set about masking (er - I mean addressing) their shortcomings.   Like Indiana Tech currently, the ABA did a site visit and XXXXXXX greased the right palms to get provisional accreditation with the subsequent application.

This summer XXXXXXX Law School set about triumphantly celebrating their dogged determination saturating the media with the news that they had finally met the ABA’s minimum required level of competence .  Delirious with their self-congratulations, they seem to have forgotten a couple “small” matters - enrolling a class and training competent graduates.

XXXXXXX enrolled [small] a class of X students for the Fall 201X term and their first graduates only had a [less than 60%] bar pass rate.  

Cue the XXXXXXX apologists [ed. note: fanboys] in five …..four …… three…..

PS: I am a trapped [law school] student hoping to transfer so I hope you can honor my request for anonymity.  If not, do with this what you will.

TL;DR

Even andré douglas pond cummings (that’s right, he doesn’t capitalize his name) and his vast expertise in hip hop couldn’t seduce more than 15 students to join Indiana Tech Law School’s Sisyphean clusterfuck for the Class of 2018. Look, you could host a party offering a 12-pack of Keystone Light and slices of Oscar Mayer balogna, both served at room temperature, and still have 15 law professors attend. You wouldn’t even have to splurge on bum wine.

Read all about it: http://www.theindianalawyer.com/indiana-tech-law-school-restarts-accreditation-process-welcomes-zoeller/PARAMS/article/38054

On April 23, 2015, the Wall Street Journal ran the following article detailing the continued downward trajectory of the deceptive and disgusting legal education industry: Law School Applicant Pool Still Shrinking.

The comments to the story are illustrative of the life that awaits, lemmings:

Avoid Law School wrote:            

Now is a horrible time to go to law school. With the ongoing market correction, the cost of tuition has dropped at many law schools and should continue to decline. Why pay more tuition now when you can pay significantly less simply by waiting out a cycle or two. Additionally, the law job market is still dismal due to technological replacement and outsourcing of law jobs. The legal profession is in turmoil and now is most definitely not the time to enter it.

Unemployed Lawyer wrote:           

As an underemployed and now an unemployed lawyer, I recommend NOT going to law school.  There are still something like two to three lawyers for every job [NOTE: yes, even the low-paying jobs!].  Even if law schools stopped operating today, it would take years for the excess to be absorbed.  And you cannot do anything with a law degree except be a lawyer.  The JD makes it very difficult for you to obtain non-legal employment.  It's a scarlet letter.  Supply still vastly exceeds demand for lawyers.  The real demand is for accountants, programmers, healthcare workers, financial analysts, etc.

Surprised wrote:           

The Bloomberg article relies on the statistic that summer associates at major law firms are getting full-time offers at a higher rate than in previous years, but completely ignores that 90% of law students will never get an offer to be a law-firm summer associate to begin with (and if you're not a summer associate it's highly unlikely that you'll ever get hired by one of these firms).  The reckless disregard Bloomberg and the WSJ have here is startling and downright baffling.  There is no current scarcity -- previously there was perhaps 5 times the number of graduates as the economy demanded and now there are 4 times as many.   Dig just a little bit into the statistics.  Review what the non-profit Law School Transparency is posting.          

Perfect Time wrote:           

to Buy Enron Stock, too.  It must be more valuable, now that less people want it. Law schools are scum.  Despite 40% drop, no law schools have closed.  Law schools are run by law faculty for the benefit of law faculty: 2-4 hours of teaching a week, Sabbaticals, Tenure, Summers Off, six-figure salaries, and other goodies.  It won't get better until the system changes.  Despite all the free time these faculty members have, there is no leadership.  The ABA is worthless.  Law schools have not changed much since the 1890's, the only thing that has changed is that tuition is much higher, law schools have lowered admission standards, and there is a huge surplus of graduates.

Sy Abelman wrote:           

Take it from a 25 year veteran attorney.  I am blogging on a Monday morning because I have no work or no new clients.  I am not lazy or stupid. My diary is empty for the week.  I used to have three to four matters up daily prior to 07.  In Illinois alone, there are 91,000 lawyers and just 55,000 Walmart workers.  Think about that. My buddy who's out 30 years was almost in tears because he had no work and a child in college.

wonder man wrote:           

Thank you! We really appreciate the support. The legal education industry has destroyed so many lives through its misleading and false marketing (in addition to a host of other problems). There are thousands of law school graduates and lawyers struggling to get by, but law school applicants and people studying for the LSAT think they’re entering a well-paid career. A small sliver of lawyers make a great living, some make an okay living, but most struggle greatly and deeply regret going to law school.

Check out this comment by Andrew Bruskin, an actual attorney who passed multiple bar exams and has already taken the LSAT and graduated from law school. Perhaps his experience would be relevant to you, young lemming. He provided the following insightful comment under a New York Observer story about the horrific debt awaiting law schools grads:

Andrew Bruskin:

A 27-year veteran attorney also offered a fantastic comment on the garbage CNBC article. No comment necessary, because he lays out what a CON the law school game is. This is a lawyer who has practiced law for 27 years. Do you think he doesn’t know what he’s talking about? Law school is a complete and utter rip-off. Again, if you’re not going to HYS, or don’t have a full ride, or don’t have an inside connection on a job, don’t waste your life applying to law school. Law schools are run by greedy, vicious, and bitter people who will smile and tell you fairy tales about the legal employment market recovering and all the exciting things their grads are doing. Like this 27-year attorney notes, it’s pure poppycock. Avoid law school. Pick an industry that creates value and is growing. There are many such industries in America. And if you can’t find them with a couple quick Google searches, perhaps you’re not quite as bright as you think you are and we just saved you $100-250k in life-destroying law school debt.

Here’s the awesome comment:

pogden297:

FANTASTIC comment from a lawyer named Rita under a garbage CNBC story about lawyers. News flash: unless you go to Harvard, Yale, or Stanford or you’re in the top 10% of your class (the percentage of grads that are eligible for these jobs increases as the law school US News rank goes but, but never enough to justify the risk of taking on $100-250k+ in debt and the opportunity cost of spending three priceless years of your 20s working on something that, for many if not most, turns out to be worth less than a fart in the wind in the job market). Lemmings, why do you possibly think an actual attorney who’s actually passed the bar and actually already been through the law school process would think something like this? Comments are in brackets. In any case, here’s Rita’s comment.

RITA:

Great comment on the ABA Journal (remember lemmings - these are actual lawyers and former law school customers. learn from their mistakes!)

Florida Coastal is a prime example the law school scam - anyone can get it.  You could take the LSAT with a blind fold on and get in.  The tuition is outrageous and the "education" useless (the case method is a complete joke).

Law school has become such a scam.  They lie about employment/salary statistics to get young, naive people to enroll, and then charge them outrageous tuition to "teach" these students how to be lawyers (and by "teach" I mean make them read judicial opinions for 3 years).

An actual honest-to-goodness lawyer recently wrote this post on an LSU message board:

“Anyone who wants to go to law school needs to have their head examined. It’s just too competitive, too stressful, and not a good means of being happy and making a living. Soul crushing is a good descriptor.”

My law school, which has given me $100k+ in debt and no job (as yet) would like me to donate to future scholarships. pic.twitter.com/yvwnq9invT

The number of first-year students this academic year declined nationwide to the lowest enrollment since 1973.

Brent Phipps always figured he’d segue seamlessly from his undergraduate studies to law school, but the economy changed his timeline.

“There are whole websites dedicated to hating on law schools and the legal profession,” he said. [Gee, why would that be Brent? Do you think they're dissatisfied customers or do you think they're all just craaaaazy?]

...

The drop in enrollment is not necessarily a bad thing, Phipps said. The decrease resulted from the massive oversupply of new attorneys for available jobs, he said, not because new lawyers will not be needed.

After all, he said, “they’re not wagon makers who have been wholly replaced or eliminated.” [HA! Very astute, young Phipps. There remains, however, one critical problem with your analysis: if X individuals and corporations need legal services and 40(X) law school grads are licensed and able to provide those services, what happens to law grads? Further, he is simply incorrect in that legal services are most certainly being eliminated by a variety of technology and business process outsourcing companies. See our "Damn Research" page for more information on that note. Of course, the demand for lawyers is not being "wholly" replaced or eliminated, but instead significantly and substantially replaced and eliminated. Ask an attorney who provides family law, small business, wills and trusts legal services whether LegalZoom has had a negative impact on his or her bottom line. Ask a copyright lawyer whether the plethora of online copyright services have had a negative impact. Ask some doc review lawyers whether outsourcing companies and predictive coding have helped that lawyer pay down their enormous student loan debts. You will learn in due time, young Phipps.]

...

At the University of Richmond, law school numbers remained stable over the past few years, and Dean Wendy Collins Perdue credits UR’s affordability and “particular kind of very personal, student-focused education.” [Yes, and the vast universe of law firms eagerly waiting to hire a bright, new law school graduate care ever so much about the level of "personal, student-focused education" their future highly-paid and happy associates!]

First-year Phoebe Willis said those were reasons she chose UR.

“I found my professors really care about me, not just as a student in the confines of the classroom but as a person,” Willis said. One even knows the names of her three siblings, she said. [They care because your student loans are paying for their car payments, mortgage expenses, vacations, fancy clothes, and their children's private schooling and college bills! Wouldn't you care too?! These professors are like good salespeople - once you can fake sincerity, you've got it made! Try seeing if the professor knows the names of your three siblings while you're living with your parents after graduation, desperately searching for part-time volunteer opportunities among the vast sea of desperate, broke solos.]

...

Now, some commentators predict that by 2016 or ’17, there actually will be a shortage of graduates, Perdue said, but there will be a lag time before the information about opportunities gets out to perspective students. [Now what financial interest does Dean Wendy Collins Perdue have to repeat these baseless predictions? Do you think she's a neutral observer? Or perhaps, she's just putting all on red and hoping for the best. Also, there was a "lag time" in letting the general public know that a huge portion of law school graduates across the country have been having their lives destroyed by debt and horrific job opportunities. Where are all the great opportunities for the graduates that have been utterly wrecked from 2010 to 2015, Dean Perdue? If you're thinking about law school, understand that individuals like Dean Perdue are engaging in "sales puffery," a cute little concept you'll learn during your first year contracts class. Spend some time Googling it and save yourself $180,000 and a lifetime of misery. There will be no shortage of lawyers and there will be no increased demand for law school graduates in the next decade.]

...

Liberty is one of two law schools in the state with a religious focus. Liberty’s mission is “to train Christian attorneys in law rooted in Scripture that they can use in every facet of the legal profession,” [interim Liberty Law Dean Rena] Lindevaldsen said. [Yes, so Christ-like to load up your students with unpayable debt, sell them falsehoods about all the fantastic and super terrific job opportunities that await, and dump their jobless butts into the toxic legal job market. WWJD? #AmIright]

...

There are also some great comments below the story:

Brian Hamrick Jones (Attorney Partner at Barnes & Diehl, P.C.): "There is a pretty simple reason for lower law school enrollments. It boils down to lifestyle. Do you trade free time for money? That's it. Been a lawyer for 22 years. Made a great living, but spent most of my time in my office and even more time worrying about my cases. The job doesnt end at 5:00 and even when time in the office is over is still consumes. I think 25% of my law school class is out of practicing law and in many respects I envy them. Go to dental school instead." [Hint: this guy is almost the best case scenario you can imagine coming out of law school. He made a "great living." How many law grads can claim that?]

Bill Ray: "We have a glut of lawyers largely because of money and media. Universities want law schools because they are huge money-makers. Large classrooms, high tuition, and fewer teachers means big revenue. People love to watch crime and emotional conflict. Lawyer TV shows give eyes to viewers to see that entertainment. The reality is that having so much intellectual talent focused on such insignificant matters to society (e.g. who gets pots and pans in a divorce, who gets a ticket for speeding or convicted of DUI) is a bad thing. A drop in law school enrollment is a good thing. We have eight law schools in Virginia. Why any rational person would go to Appalachian, Liberty or Regent law schools is beyond me. They are simply throwing away good money for a life of average income. Mommas don't let your babies grow up to be lawyers." [Note how he mentioned "average income" - this is the common outcome for law school grads and when you factor in enormous, high-interest student loans, you're venturing into "below average" territory.]

Jerry Frawley: "why spend 150,000 to 200,000 to join a proffession that is consistently rated lower than rats. And have to work extremely long hours on cases that constantly change for people who will not respect you. And all because you are so deep in student debt you have little chance to recover."

So there you have it, lemmings. Read between the lines. Note that the McGuireWoods partner seeks only "top" students. This means top 10% at a school ranked 15-25 or top 20% at a T14 (possibly higher). Also note that the story states McGuireWoods hiring classes aren't as large as they used to be. How does this all fit together? It's not very hard to figure out, lemmings. By going to law school, you are paying an exorbitant sum of money to partake in a contest and the winner of the contest is determined by taking a single 3-4 hour exam at the end of a semester. Although some individuals certainly have a knack for law school-style exams, most do not. Every in your class will be roughly on the same IQ band as you (save for the 176-180 LSAT-types, who get full scholarships paid for by your student loan conduit butt). 

Law professors have to make judgment calls about whose answer they liked better. It can be a very close call. But the difference between a B+ and an A- can literally be the difference between spending your lifetime trying to pay back your law school loans or enjoying a "posh" prestigious sexy BigLaw job where you're inside an office and billing huge hours for the rest of your life. Law school is a contest and the vast majority of contestants are losers. It isn't like undergrad where the object is to teach you concepts. The objective is to sort the winners from the losers. By attending law school, you are agreeing to participate in a game.

If you are prudent and value your sanity and happiness, you will take the decision to attend law school EXTREMELY seriously because it will impact the remainder of your one and only life. As we've stated previously, don't go to law school unless (a) you get into a top 5 school; or (b) you get a full ride; or (c) your ending debt will be less than $50,000. Keep in mind these rules can be altered based upon whether you have significant family or inside connections in the legal industry that can guarantee you a job (also realize that many people enjoy this advantage and this skews the abysmal employment statistics in an even worse direction for the unconnected). 

If you're thinking about starting up a business, be a real scam artist and open up a law school. #StraightCashHomie