lemonade

even if you only reblog, that’s enough

1st of February, 2021

i was debating on whether or not i should post this on tumblr but seeing as there haven’t been posts about this yet, here it is. i’m exposing my real location and nationality but it doesn’t matter.

if you have been active on twitter, you may already know #savemyanmar is trending. long story short, there has been a military coup. several nations have released statements but i want to share insight on what’s happening in the country.

memes about a coup have been circulating around for a couple days and when i slept at 2 am last night, we were still under the rule of the National League for Democracy (NLD). while they are not technically democratic, they are the closest we’ve got. when my mother woke up at 6 this morning, she was notified that the country was now under the rule of the military.

banks services are no longer available. wifi was cut at around 7-8. some people got wifi again earlier but many got it barely thirty minutes ago. this is bad for businesses especially ones that require international communications. additionally, international students like myself are experiencing anxiety; how do we pay for and attend classes if we’re not sure wifi is a given?

myanmar has a long, complicated history with military governments. the last time the military went into rule was in 1962 and only stopped in 2011, following the 2010 elections. there was a huge protest in 1988 lead by students that resulted in lots of death. during the military junta, resources like rice, water, oil, were scarce. the gist is military rule is bad for us.

all of my followers are not myanmar citizens, i’m sure but as part of the international community, please help us. here is a petition that you can sign (although i’m not sure if that can do much). there may be protests in front of myanmar embassies so look out for those. most of all, please help spread awareness. 

the people here are coping with dark humor, primarily in the form of memes but we don’t know how long this rule will last, even though the official statement said only a year. here’s something that pretty much sums up our coping mechanism:

again, even a reblog helps

this is stuff that i’ve found helpful and am in the process of working on. they may not be achievable for you without help and may not work for your specific circumstance, but this is a list of suggestions that you might be able to think about. i am also not a mental health professional so please do feel free to contradict me!!

self soothing.  having a toolbox to take care of yourself by yourself. bc sometimes nobody else is available and you just gotta put some lotion on, listen to a tune, and go to bed early. 

checking in. checking in with yourself to see if you’re okay. knowing how to alter your strategies when your strategies aren’t working. knowing when your strategies aren’t working. this is just taking some time every day to reflect on what goals you didn’t meet and why and what you can do to fix that.

there’s nothing you “should” be doing. if you get caught up thinking “i should be doing x” that’s false! stop that! “should” be doing better implies that you have some obligation to do whatever it is that you “should” be doing. you don’t owe anybody except yourself. analyze why you think you should be doing that thing and change that into…. “i want to be doing x because…” or “doing x will make me happier, because…”. overall, more productive and less self-shamey. 

disconnecting from the crowd. eating in a crowded dining hall can be stressful! knowing how to be alone in a crowd and stay calm is helpful

being okay with being alone.  tbh college is kind of… being alone a lot, in my experience. even though you’re surrounded by people, a lot of time is spent alone. making friends is hard. your friends have different schedules. you’re busy. shit sucks. we make the best of it.

knowing yourself. this relates to a lot of what i’ve already said but like. knowing your emotional state and knowing what helps trick the monkey brain is helpful. stop repressing your feelings, friends.

talking to strangers. ordering from a menu! paying library fines. going to office hours. asking for a cashier at the register if there isn’t one. ya this is hard. ya you gotta expose yourself. sometimes i just try playing a persona. like this isn’t me ordering a sandwich. this is a cool me who knows how to talk to people who is ordering a sandwich.

you don’t have to be friends with your roommates. you just have to live together in a way that doesn’t make you two hate each other. ideally, you two will coexist in a way that doesn’t interfere with the other’s daily life.

give and taking. on the topic of roommates, sometimes your roommate can be a shitty person, but sometimes you are the shitty person! give a little but if they’re negatively impacting your life, communicate.

communicating during disagreements. explain what your emotions are instead of blaming them. “i feel hurt when you…” or “i feel frustrated when” or “i feel unappreciated when.” if things get heated, ask if you both can take a ten minute break and then come back. and don’t bring up disagreements when the other party is preoccupied or going somewhere. you can legitimately schedule a discussion.

it’s okay to apologize. learning to swallow your pride gets easier each time.

knowing that people work differently than you. some people are not gonna click with you and it’s gonna seem like they have this whole brain process up there that is totally unlike yours. and yeah! that’s how it is. and that’s chill if they aren’t hurting anyone else. work with them and be flexible!! 

comforting people. you will probably/definitely see someone cry! hell if i know how to comfort people. someone please help. but some things i’ve learned are: 1) different people need different things. different people need different things! 2) people need different things at different times. 3) you can ask them what they want and it won’t be weird. 4) apparently a lot of people like hugs? but ask. and it’s okay to not want a hug. 5) just show that you care in some way if you don’t know what they need. i used to think that if somebody needed to tell me what they needed it was a sign that i just didn’t know them well enough and we weren’t compatible or i wasn’t being a good friend. that’s fake! friendship isn’t based off of fitting naturally in every way and making an effort to be good for them is important.

knowing it’s okay to not be liked by everyone. it’s okay if strangers think you’re dumb because you said something dumb in public. you know you’re not dumb. it’s okay if not everybody you meet likes you. it’s okay if you do something cringey. everybody has their own shit to deal with and you will not shatter their world.  grow and move on!

forgiving yourself. i’m trying this new thing where when i feel embarrassed about something i say. out loud. “i forgive myself.” and then i just try to grow from that and move on without getting caught in a spiral of shame.

knowing what you need vs what you want and what is better at the time. what you need: a shower. what you want: to not do that. solution: take a shower! or maybe what you actually need is to go to sleep? but guess what. you probably know what is good for you. the hard part is actually doing it.

realize that building habits is less work than discipline. emotional effort is expended every time you have to make yourself do something. just make it part of your routine and you’ll just think it’s normal to do all the good things! like, for example, i’m trying to make it a habit to eat structured meals instead of a “eat when i’m hungry” thing because i know that makes me skip meals, which is bad!

you won’t be able to do everything. forgive yourself for that. write down  things that are top priority and focus on them. everything else is not important right now and you shouldn’t beat yourself up for not being able to do them.

your health is important. i’m not saying health will solve all your problems. it won’t! but health will cause a lot of your problems to go away. because let’s face it. not sleeping causes a lot of problems. 

1. start studying a week before every quiz/test. seriously.

2. watch youtube videos/ted talks on the topics you are learning about.

3. get lots of sleep! sleep helps you process the day’s events, including what you learned.

4. write out your notes. it’s proven that handwritten notes help you learn better than typed out notes.

5. don’t just read what your professor gives you. find academic journals, books, etc. that correspond with your subjects.

6. read the news! especially in the social sciences/humanities, connecting concepts with current events helps you understand and process more easily.

7. exercise! this doesn’t have to be going on runs or lifting weights, it could even just be going for a 20 minute walk. just get your blood pumping, it’ll help you focus.

8. study at your desk. it may be tempting to study in bed, but your brain connects your bed with sleep, so you’ll get tired more quickly.

9. reviewing notes doesn’t have to be something you sit down and do for an hour. skim through them and test your memory while eating breakfast!

10. expand your study time throughout the day to avoid burnout. for example, rather than studying for 5 hours straight, study for an hour here and there in between your activities.

11. make your notes organized and easy to read, but not distracting. bright colors and flashy notes may seem better, but can sometimes distract from the purpose of the notes.

12. use apps such as quizlet. this way, you can go through definitions while waiting in lines or walking to class.

13. it’s more important to know concepts rather than facts. for example, you should be able to take what you know and apply it to different situations, not just the situation the textbook gives you.

14. just because the professor doesn’t require you to read textbook, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. it helps explain concepts in a different way than your professor, and a lot of times hearing two different explanations for the same concept helps you understand it.

15. read in advance. read the textbook before your professor begins going over the chapter, so when he/she does, you can easily follow what they are saying.

16. do any extra credit work that comes your way. even if you don’t need the extra boost now, you might later.

17. go to class!! if you always skip class and show up at office hours completely lost on the concepts, they’ll laugh in your face. they’ll take you 100x more seriously if you show up.

18. however, if you are sick, take a day off. it’s more beneficial to you in the long run. 

19. learn how to say “no”. if you have an 8 am the next day, don’t stay out until midnight with your friends. 

anything is better than nothing. reading one page, one paragraph, even one sentence, is better than reading none. maybe next week you can do two. maybe not. it's still better than nothing, i promise

making to-do lists and organizing your things is nice, and feels productive, but it's important to know when you're using them as a way to procrastinate

mindfulness is so important! go on a walk and pay attention to your surroundings. if you don't think you can go on a walk, just sit outside. even just open a window and observe what you hear, what you see, etc—even just a couple minutes of mindful observation is helpful.

this one doesn't help everyone, but if you just can't get up to do that one task and you're just lying there struggling to make yourself do it, count down from 5 and then get up at 1. then count down from 5 again and do the next step. and the next. splitting it up into tiny pieces helps, whether it's for an assignment or even just getting dressed.

bad mental health days happen. recovery is hard! that doesn't mean you're back where you started. if you stay in this mindset then you'll be stuck there—sometimes the bad days are just bad days.

i'll post more of these as i think of them but these are the things that are helping me right now + i thought they might help others !