Living Not Existing

I don’t know how to shake it. I don’t know what to do.

Im laying here barely barley doing work.

Even though pride celebrations was canceled it doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate. I am unapologetically me and I love who I grown into. Spread love and not hate!! Happy pride everyone. If you know someone who needs help please assist. We have to help one another mentally, physically, and emotionally.

I want to be touched right now in this darkness. A light touch. Sometime to say I’m not alone in this darkness. Would like the touch to be cold, yet delicate. Enough to know that I’m being touched.

I love hard... I love deep.... I love unconditionally....

This happens naturally and sometimes it can make me blind. I’m going down this same path again, where I love so hard. This time I’m afraid. I hate to admit it but I’m terrified. I don’t want to be hurt. I hear this from friends “hurt may come and it’s part of life”. I get that but that doesn’t help the fear.

However, what I’m feeling I do like. I like loving someone deeply. I love giving my all. I love wanting to make the significant other happy.

I know I just need to look forward and stay positive. Stay strong and stay smart. It will be okay. This is Just feelings and thoughts that come about before I sleep.