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i want to write the on-again-off-again relationships. i want the screaming matches and the cancelled dates and the hurt feelings and the second guesses and second chances. 

i want to write people who completely shake up each other’s daily routine and flip their entire world on its axis. i want them to drive each other crazy and question why they bother sticking around and then remember the way their partner laughs or see them in a moment of vulnerability that tells them ‘this is is why i stay. this is why i love you.‘ 

i want to write relationships with struggles. with class differences and financial divide. two people who are so completely different they somehow complete each other. i want the jealousy and the feelings of inadequacy that goes with it. 

i want to write people who aren’t afraid to be honest with their partner. who aren’t afraid to say ‘yeah you’re being an asshole’ followed by ‘but i still love you, you idiot.’

i want the first time they see their partner cry and the morning after their first intimate night when everything feels so right.

i want people who get so used to one another that they stop going the extra mile. i want the ‘you don’t make the effort because you already have me’ argument.

i want relationships that challenge each other to be better people and make each other question their beliefs and moral compass. 

but most of all, i want to write relationships that are real. that make you feel something. i want to go on the emotional rollercoaster right along with them.

" so how did you want to handle this? "

" you intimidate me a little. "

" i'll do better, i promise. "

" we can do this. "

" you changed my life, you made it better, made it brighter. "

" don't you dare die, we're not finished yet. "

" every day we face death. "

" do you want to dance it out? "

" do you want to drink tequila? "

" if i was the kind of person who kissed people, i'd kiss you. "

" i tried to change. "

" a wo(man) can change. "

" not everybody has to be happy all the time. "

" are you in the dark place? "

" why are you avoiding me? "

" it's gonna be okay. "

" should i leave? "

" don't say anything. "

" i don't know how you get up in the morning. "

" i'm not done loving you. "

" when did you become an optimist? "

" don't get mad at me because i care. "

" you don't have to say anything. "

" the hard part is over, right? "

" if you see the warm, welcoming light, do not go into it. "

" my head is exploding. "

" are... are you mad at me? "

" i wish i was all someone thought about. "

" what separates you from the other's is greatness. "

" i'm never good enough, no matter what i say or do. "

" you don't have to do this. "

" we've gotten this far. "

" i wish i was secure enough to handle that without a bruised ego and a lot of processed sugar. "

" so you think i'm broken? fix me. "

" i don't want to lose you. "

" i still love you whether you're capable of letting me or not. "

" don't ask me if i'm okay. "

" i was a kid then, but i'm a wo(man) now, so i'll do better. "

" i deserve a second chance. "

" i wanted to be better for you. "

" i know how hard for you to trust people, and i just wanted to be someone you can depend on. "

" go! get out of here! "

" i'm not a bad wo(man). "