Had the worst psychiatry appointment of my entire life more than three hours ago and I still start trembling again every time I think about it for longer than five or six seconds. I've made so much progress this year regarding my confidence and sense of self-worth and recognition that maybe I haven't deserved the shitty things that have been said and done to me over the course of my life—that maybe I'm not a bad person, maybe I'm not a waste of space and resources. It's like I've spent the past four or five months carefully gluing myself back together in a better, stronger form, and then this woman hurled me at the floor before any of the glue could set and now I'm in fucking pieces all over again and can't remember how to rebuild what I was starting to build before it broke again


















