I met Leon at a bar on a Saturday night.
He was at the counter and I sat next to him. We talked until the bar closed. I woke up in his bed the next morning with his arm across my chest.
By the following weekend we were together.
In bed he was direct. He knew exactly what he was doing. He'd just bend me over and breed me.
He was vers but he never pushed me. Occasionally he'd ask me to top. I'd try, and it would be bad. I already knew I was bad at it. After a few minutes he'd reach up, hands on my hips, and turn me over without making anything of it. He'd slide back in and I'd feel the shame and the relief arrive at exactly the same moment.
He never said anything about it.
The foot thing started early. He'd noticed I got nervous when he touched me with his feet. Started resting his heel on my thigh when we sat together chatting. His feet on my chest while he watched something on his phone. His sole pressed to my face in the middle of sex.
Leon paid attention to what I responded to. He'd learn something once and remember it permanently. He'd let me finish to his feet sometimes, his sole against my mouth or his toes pushed between my lips while I jerked myself off.
Then things started to slow down.
I don't know exactly when I first felt it. We still ate together, slept in the same bed, still talked, still laughed. But in bed something had shifted. His attention was somewhere else. When we had sex it was quick and efficient. He'd finish and reach for his phone. I'd lie there.
I tried harder. It didn't matter.
One night I got desperate enough. We were in bed, lying there, and I reached for his waistband and started pulling his pants down. He pushed me away. Then he pointed at his foot.
"Just lick it and jerk off."
He pulled the sheet back up and turned on his side.
I went down and finished to his feet.
I didn't bring it up in the morning. He didn't either.
It kept happening.
I came home on a Friday evening, later than usual.
The lights were on inside. I could hear voices before I got the key in the door. Leon's laugh, and another one I didn't immediately place.
I opened the door and saw them on the couch.
Leon was leaning back, drink in hand, relaxed, enjoying himself. The guy next to him was from our gym. I'd seen him there enough times. Mike. I'd heard Leon mention the name once or twice over the past few weeks.
He was lean and young, curly dark hair. He had a drink too.
Neither of them looked up when I walked in.
I stood there for a moment. Then I set my bag down and sat in the armchair across from them.
"Hey"
Leon glanced over briefly. Mike didn't turn at all.
They kept talking. Leon said something and Mike laughed and leaned into him slightly. Leon didn't move away.
I sat there.
At some point Leon stood up. He said something to Mike I didn't catch. Mike stood too.
They went to the bedroom.
The door closed. I heard the lock a second later.
I sat there for another minute after the lock clicked.
I don't know what I expected. Some part of me was still waiting for the door to open again, for Leon to come back out and say something explain, acknowledge, anything. He didn't.
Then I heard Mike moaning.
I moved from the armchair to their couch. The wall between the living room and the bedroom ran directly behind it. I sat against it and listened.
Leon was the one moaning next.
I couldn't do that thing.
I don't know why I got hard. I sat there with my boyfriend's sounds coming through the wall. I listened and stroked myself and thought about the fact that Mike was doing something to Leon that I had never been able to do.
I came when they did. I fell asleep with my pants around my thighs, head back against the wall.
I woke up in the early morning with my pants still down.
I pulled them up and sat there for a moment. I got up and went to the bedroom door and knocked once. No answer. I tried the handle and it opened.
The room was dim, curtains still drawn. Leon and Mike were in the bed together, both in boxers, Leon half on top of Mike, Mike's arm around him.
I went to the wardrobe and changed out of my work clothes.
Then I saw Mike's feet.
They were at the end of the bed, rubbing with Leon's. Both together made me hard.
Leon looked at me for a moment.
"Did our feet make you hard, babe? Come suck our toes while we make out."
I didn't say anything. I got down on my knees at the foot of the bed.
Mike's sole was warm. I started there, pressing my mouth to it, running my tongue along the arch. He didn't look at me. I took his toes in my mouth while the two of them kissed above me.
I switched to Leon's feet and did the same. I stayed down there for a while.
"That's enough. Go make us breakfast. Don't come back in until I call you."
I got off my knees.
I pulled the door shut behind me and stood in the hallway for a second, then went to the kitchen.
I was getting eggs out of the fridge when I heard Leon start moaning again.
