sentence memes.

WHEN YOU’RE READY . ‘  don’t know why i tried .  ’ ‘  i promise i’ll be around .  ’ ‘  what if my dad is right ?  ’ ‘  i’ll wait forever .  ’ ‘  i know your heart like the back of my hand .  ’

‘ i have the best weekend ever planned, man. ’ ‘ when are you gonna do some, like, real acting ? ’ ‘ can we please go to fucking carls junior ? ’ ‘ i can’t really eat that stuff right now, i’m on a cleanse. ’ ‘ so you’re not drinking, you’re not smoking weed... ’ ‘ no, no, i’m drinking, i’m smoking weed. ’ ‘ if you stopped eating gluten, you’d feel way fucking better. ’ ‘ whenever you feel shitty ? that’s ‘cause of gluten. ’ ‘ who the fuck told you not to eat gluten ? ’ ‘ you don’t even know what gluten is ! ’ ‘ it’s something that’s used to categorize things that are bad ! ’ ‘ calories ! that’s a gluten. fat ! that’s a gluten. ’ ‘ so this is how the other half lives. ’ ‘ it’s all of your favorite things ! ’ ‘ it says [name] in joints. ’ ‘ you are just... the best people. ’ ‘ it eases the transition... the much needed foreplay. ’ ‘ i’m a well-known homosexual advocate. ’ ‘ i haven’t seen it yet, but i’ve heard it’s supposed to be bonkers. ’ ‘ we’ll chill together and we’ll chill with these other guys ! we’ll all chill as one big unit. ’ ‘ you know what ? [name]’s an inspiration. ’ ‘ for you, i will go. ’ ‘ i wanna be with you all night. ’ ‘ this is the sexiest street in america. ’ ‘ this place is like a piece of me. you just stepped inside of me. ’ ‘ guess what buddy, you like art ! ’ ‘ look at him, he’s like.. a hipster, right ? ’ ‘ you seem to hate a lot of things, and the bottom of your pants are awful tight. ’ ‘ you hate movies that are universally loved. ’ ‘ nobody’s that nice. serial killers are that nice. ’ ‘ why the fuck do you think i put up the sign ? ’ ‘ somebody took my fucking cellphone ! ’ ‘ it’s unbelievable, it’s unacceptable ! ’ ‘ oh shit, that’s embarrassing. ’ ‘ can you lower your voice ? you’re freaking out [name]. ’ ‘ maybe i’m the one whose freaked out ! ’ ‘ he’s not as strong as you. ’ ‘ we are all soft ! we pretend to be hard, but we’re soft as baby shit ! ’ ‘ there’s racoons and bandits and shit out there ! ’ ‘ the good guys are here ! ’ ‘ we’re fine ! it’s gonna be fine ! ’ ‘ i went out this morning and specifically bought this milky way. ’ ‘ i’m not sporting a crop top in your house. ’ ‘ you couldn’t handle my midriff. ’ ‘ i’m gonna sleep with you. ’ ‘ i’m gonna sleep with you, it’s too scary to sleep alone. ’ ‘ maybe this horrible, horrible, deadly earthquake happened to make us closer as friends. ’ ‘ not terminator two, for god sakes. ’ ‘ you wanna spoon ? ’ ‘ goodnight my sweet guys. ’ ‘ he didn’t suck any dick last night. ’ ‘ now i KNOW y’all are trippin’. ’ ‘ here’s my vote; fuck all of you. ’ ‘ this is real, this is fucking real ! ’ ‘ i’ve been feeling really weird about him lately. ’ ‘ i know that dude ! ’ ‘ i’m straight up lovable, son. ’ ‘ you’re just as shitty as the rest of us. ’ ‘ hey, what’s cheese without a few crackers, you know what i’m sayin’ ? ’ ‘ weed is for the people ! it’s the people’s weed ! ’ ‘ b-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f forever ! ’ ‘ you’re british, right ? you’re used to eating shitty food ? ’ ‘ don’t talk about [name] like that. ’ ‘ that’s fucked up, man, i’m right here. ’ ‘ she’s like a little sister. ’ ‘ what kinda vibes are you talking about ? ’ ‘ chill the fuck out, man, puttin’ that shit in the mix ! ’ ‘ the one who denies it, supplies it ! ’ ‘ it’s me, america’s sweetheart ! ’ ‘ it’s smoky as fuck out here. ’ ‘ somebody, throw me a knife. ’ ‘ o-m-g, [name], i’m so sorry. ’ ‘ you saw something out there, didn’t you ? ’ ' this is the real shit, right now, happenin’. ’ ‘ do shit unto people that would do the same shit to you. ’ ‘ we’re gonna do it together. ’ ‘ who has goddamn porno mags anymore ? ’ ‘ don’t walk away. ’ ‘ it’s too late, i’ve already walked away too much. ’ ‘ remember when i got you that twenty dollar taco bell gift certificate, and i bet that you couldn’t eat that much taco bell ? ’ ‘ i broke my ass ! ’ ‘ this is terrence peterson, my monkey flashlight keychain. ’ ‘ i needed to wash down that dry ass cinnamon toast crunch. ’ ‘ you’re making me into a joke right now and you are not gonna like the fucking punchline. ’ ‘ god fucking dammit, i’m gonna kill this motherfucker ! ’ ‘ that’s what i thought, nerd. ’ ‘ that fucker has got to go. ’ ‘ i party so fuckin’ hard. always have. ever since i was a baby. ’ ‘ you didn’t have my back back there ! you fuckin’ disappoint me. ’ ‘ that self-righteous, cocksucking, two-faced backstabber. ’ ‘ you’re twisting that shit around. ’ ‘ textbook twattage. ’ ‘ his insides are worse than my outsides. ’ ‘ what’s up, what were you thinking that day ? ’ ‘ just kill [name], that would be so tight. ’ ‘ so something... uh, not that chill, happened last night. ’ ‘ just... bad sleep, crazy dream. ’ ‘ uhh, lemme break it down for you; i’m not fucking going. ’ ‘ what do you think this is, scooby doo ? ’ ‘ this shit’s cray-cray, guys. ’ ‘ acting like it’s hot when it’s cold. sitting on the beach, it’s freezing, you’re in your draws, talkin’ about how everybody’s surfing. ’ ‘ they didn’t make a mistake. ’ ‘ there’s a reason we’re all here. ’ ‘ i gouged a man’s eyeballs out. ’ ‘ god did this. ’ ‘ the power of christ is compelling me ? that’s what’s happening ? ’ ‘ you’re gonna repeat lines from the exorcist ? ’ ‘ well, i assume they did their fuckin’ research. ’ ‘ we’ve got an exorcism to finish, hello ! ’ ‘ i would have sucked a dick for half a cracker ! ’ ‘ i run over there, screaming and shit. ’ ‘ holy shit, do you know what this means ?! ’ ‘ if we’re actually nice to each other, we can get sucked up into heaven. ’ ‘ i made him my bitch ! ’ ‘ we’re friends, you can’t fucking eat us ! ’ ‘ another fine mess we’ve found ourselves in. ’ ‘ you’ve got to be fucking shitting me ! ’ ‘ i didn’t like what i became, so i hated what you became. ’ ‘ i don’t deserve to go to heaven, but you do ! ’ ‘ welcome to heaven, motherfucker. ’