there is the line between bisexual and aroace and i am using it as a jump rope

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@kneelbeforeclefairy
there is the line between bisexual and aroace and i am using it as a jump rope

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My sister genuinely, for real, met her girlfriend at a meet up for retyping poetry on vintage typewriters above a feminist bookstore, and I just want to say I’m thrilled the manic pixie dream girls of the world are moving on from whiny mediocre dudes and finding eachother instead.
Bad news y’all they broke up but my sister learned really important things about life and herself so like, we really should have seen that coming.
(context for the goat farm cursive typewriter part)
The Twilight Zone: Our episode "A Slot Machine Chases You Around Physically" was meant as a cautionary tale about the predatory nature of the gambling industry
The Gambling Industry: We've invented the slot machine that chases you around physically from The Twilight Zone episode "A Slot Machine Chases You Around Physically"
That’s a real episode, for anyone who didn’t know.
crowley’s and aziraphale’s new year’s resolutions
HAPPY END OF DAYS!!!
paul simon fact checking
❌ even in 1969 there were well over 3 million living boys in new york city
✅ not sure what it means to be art garfunkeled but i am sure it happened to paul simon
❌ no you did not paul simon
❔unverifiable
❌ he’s 5’3” a medium tree is more than enough
Nah, you're a white boy from Queens.
(this is an excuse to make people look up my favorite terrible musical , The Capeman. Actually the above song slaps. Too bad the rest of the musical is .....confused about what a musical is. )

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People are talking about the books because of the show, so I'm going to do a countdown of my least favorite pieces of misinformation about The Vampire Chronicles that I see regularly on the internet:
10. In the second to last book in the series Prince Lestat and the Realms of Atlantis, Lestat goes to the lost city of Atlantis! This is not in fact a thing that happens in the book. It's a fun book, you should read it.
9. Anne Rice hated [insert character here] which is why they aren't in the later books! No she probably didn't, she probably just forgot they existed. She cared much less about minor characters than any of us do. She also didn't feel like she could write Louis because of his headspace being so tied to a particular point in her life.
8. In Prince Lestat and the Realms of Atlantis, you find out that the vampires are aliens! That's also not what happens in that book, go read it, it's pretty fun book.
7. Anne Rice hired a ghostwriter to write Blood Canticle, or any of a number of her other books! Literally what the fuck are you talking about, why would someone write that book if they weren't Anne Rice!? Also, you think Anne Rice let someone else write LESTAT!? A thing she famously had a weird problem with!?
6. Anne Rice disowned and denounced her former work when she reverted to Christianity! All of the actual quotes about the series from her after she stopped writing it because she consecrated her writing to Christ are much funnier than the thing you're hallucinating, go look them up, she said something about how even her pornography was probably divinely inspired.
5. None of Anne Rice's books after The Queen of the Damned underwent any editing! It's not editing she was talking about, it was developmental comments from her editor, her editor who would give her feedback as she was writing the book. All of her work was copyedited, some better than others, and she actually paid for additional editors for some of her books to catch continuity issues. If you're wondering why she stopped taking developmental comments from her editor, I can only speculate, but I can tell you from reading her diary that her editor thought she should scrap most of that Armand nonsense in the middle of The Vampire Lestat. So I can't be too mad about it.
4. The concept of an unreliable narrator is central to the series throughout! No it's not, well, that and most people are using the term wrong or using it inconsistently. The series is a bunch of books mostly in first person, they rarely contradict on actual external events and most of the places where the point of views diverge are purely the personal opinions and subjective experiences of the characters. You are almost never supposed to assume a character is lying in the narration, and there are only two points in the series where anyone is actually noted to have been false in their narration. Neither of the falsehoods is a significant plot point.
3. Anne Rice didn't write books with female leads because she had too much internalized sexism and was ignorant about it! Anne Rice had internalized sexism she was completely cognizant of and actively working through in her work, you can find a bunch of interviews of her talking about it. She also did write fewer female leads because they didn't sell as well, you can find a bunch of interviews with her talking about that too. You don't have to love the way she writes about women, you can't complain she didn't write enough female leads unless you actually read the books that she wrote with female leads in them. You should go read The Witching Hour, it has a great female lead, and if you don't have time to read half a million words, go read Pandora, which is also great.
2. The books aren't gay because she either had to censor them because she couldn't make them gay in the '70s, or because she was naive and homophobic! Neither of these things are true, Anne Rice wrote Cry to Heaven in 1982, she confirmed the queerness of her characters as early as in the first book in the second half, and if you really need it hammered home, it's also in the second and third books. For what it's worth she didn't try to make them less gay later on either. It's Anne Rice, if a character isn't bisexual that's an anomaly. The sex stuff is for thematic reasons in the lore, and there's a bunch of sex stuff that doesn't contradict the lore later on. It's crazy that people who have read The Vampire Armand think this woman was avoiding writing gay sex.
1. Anne Rice wrote [insert book here] on drugs! I know this is basically an expression, but I do feel like it's important to point out that she was sober for 42 years of her life. Exactly one book in The Vampire Chronicles was written under the influence of anything, and it's the first one, and it was alcohol. You can feel any way you want about the woman or her work, but she did and wrote almost all of that shit sober.
I am so tired of show fans talking about UnReLiAbLe NaRrAtOr!!!1!! It's Not. A fucking. Thing. In the books. Other than a running joke about the vampires bitching at each other about things, (OP, what are the two instances of someone being false? The scene where Louis meets Lestat in the present day in iwtv with the mystery fledge? I can't think of another) and it's usually interpretations of what happened, or occasionally someone simply didn't have all the information and more info comes out later (the night Claudia died has three explanations for what happened, but none of them contradict. They're just....added to.) and there's nothing about the reader being meant to interpret who's telling the truth or if someone is intentionally lying or withholding information. That's all. Show. And now it's bleeding into the way people interpret the books.
But if I SAY that on reddit people are like "it's totally in the books you're an idiot"
Bmi is obvious bullshit if you ever look at any height under the average. There's a reason most charts will favor 5 ft 6 and up but just cut off at 58-60 inches, because if you actually look at the target weights for short people its fucking nonsensical. 4'11" people are supposed to be under 120 lbs? Do you think they're all fucking 12 year olds? You think 98 lbs is an acceptable weight for a fucking adult, are you fucking insane.
Fascinating how what's considered feminine and what's considered masculine can change over time. The rebranding of being a horse girl into being a stereotypical feminine girly trait needs to be studied.
Look at classic children's novels. As recently as the 50s and early 60s, being obsessed with horses as a girl was depicted as strange and tomboyish, and the very concept of being obsessed with horses from early childhood and loving toy horses and desperately wanting your own horse being a "little girl thing" and not a "little boy thing" would send someone from the 1800s and earlier into a coma.
There's maybe a point to be made here somewhere about how when keeping and riding horses stopped being necessary to the functioning of society and became a more "frivolous" thing, it was rapidly rebranded as silly and girly and for women, but what do I know.
i wrote a paper in my masculinity studies class in college about this exact phenomenon, specifically about how high heeled shoes started as a practical way for Persian cavalry to keep their feet on their stirrups, then likely due to that association, became a popular fashion item and status symbol among the upper classes of Europe, before the Great Male Renunciation of the 18th-19th centuries, when men started shunning opulence in favor of utility, leaving them as a fashion item for women instead.
I've joked that the two genders are Aesthetic and Utility before but thats just kinda the case

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My favorite running bit in btvs season 2 is Oz’s unparalleled ability to roll with the punches. Vampires are real? Ok that explains a lot. We’re stealing weapons from the U.S. military? Cool I’ll bring my van. Buffy’s a rat now can you help us look for her? I’m on it. Unfazed. Incapable of being fazed.
Click for better resolution because even with resizing to exactly the right size, tumblr still hates me
"Look at you! <3"
Squish that angel 'til he happy wiggles.
Look into his starry fucking eyes and tell him you love him.
Or else.
when a pelican bites you there's no malice in their eyes. they aren't upset at you. they are just hungry and want to see if you fit in their mouths. and if you don't then it's no problem and everything is fine. and if you do then well i guess your fate is sealed but that's ok it's a beautiful animal
Okay, see, I knew about the capybara gif:
But I didn’t know that they really are That Dense, All The Time. The same way sharks will bite anything that might be a seal, just in case, these birdbrains will apparently test just about anything for beak size.
Behold a short list of bad ideas:
Human foot is not food, bird.
That is clearly bigger than your entire body.
...You do know what a bear cub is, right? Right??
That is a BICYCLE SEAT.
That’s it; arrested for bird crimes.
Thankyou for your service sir!!!🫡

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just watched a star trek episode about a planet that relied so heavily on it's computer system that they all forgot the basics of their own knowledge. and that allowed them to miss the fact that they were being posioned with radiation and nearly ending their civilization. because they couldn't use their own knowledge to figure things out. i bring this up for no reason in particular
TFW your boyfriend is a 17th Century Catholic vampire who is NOT OVER™ the Glorious Revolution of 1688.
Ok i was expecting red flags and shit but I’m not sure what color this flag is but there’s a flag and I’m confused.
is he a character from Blackadder?
Jfc…. is it Cybersmith?