just string me up, down by the trees

take me back to when the Internet was good

the TSA's dick detector is the epitome of security theater. how many times have you ACTUALLY caught a woman trying to smuggle a small bomb in her panties

i mean average sized bomb

In love with this random guy who had a lock slapped on his storage unit for not paying its rental and not only did he ignore management and took his stuff out without paying, but also chose to steal the lock itself and send it to the LockPickingLawyer along with a confession letter

@theoutcastrogue

People always focus on the "lockpicking" part of his name and ignore that the lockpicking lawyer is, indeed, a lawyer, and can tell you exactly which crimes you committed in getting this lock to him

notice how everyone is horny today

I wish it were more common to have "bilingual" stories. By that i mean stories where it's important that 2 or more languages are spoken throughout. There isn't any translation, there's just multiple languages spoken by the characters. I understand why this is seldom done considering how heavily limiting it is to the number of people who can actually read or watch it. But idk I think the world would be better off with some stories like that.

it really pisses me off when adults sit there and drill it into kids’ heads that their youth is fleeting and tell them things like “enjoy your childhood while it lasts because this is the best it’s gonna get”. why are you telling children that adulthood is the worst thing they can experience? seriously what the fuck is wrong with you, why are you trying to make them feel like growing up is a fate worse than death? trying to convince them their life is over before it even begins? i’m tired of that shit. because tell my why my 12 year old cousin told me when she turns 30 she’ll be so depressed she’s just gonna cry all the time. what the fuck. kids don’t need to hear that their already stressful and overwhelming lives are never going to get better, that the abuse and lack of autonomy they face is apparently the highlight of their lives. they need to hear about adults who are happy to be alive and happy to have made it to their age. they need to know that growing up rules, it’s a gift and life does not have to suck for them, that they have a future that’s worth sticking around for. this rhetoric is so damaging mentally and i’m about to start hitting the adults who parrot it. i’m sorry you hate your life but you don’t get to dump your issues on these kids. don’t piss me off and leave these babies alone!

fool me once shame on you. fool me twice shame on me. fool me three times this has gotta be a sex thing for at least one of us

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