Hit that mezzo forte like

shaking my head but shaking my head the whole time to show i dont support negativity

hey you 🫵 have you washed your water bottle lately? 🫵 it’s getting hot and mold is going to grow 🫵 wash it 🫵

for real tho it feels exhausting that ive seen this whole "woman should be allowed to abstain from X beauty standard" -> "i perform X beauty standard, am i evil? do you think im evil? please forgive me i came up with a dozen excuses 🥺" since like 2015 (and i know its been going on longer than that) like girl thats not the poiiiiint

look me in the eyes. repeat after me. "i face societal pressure to perform this beauty standard. i should not face that pressure. i conform to this standard. i am rewarded for performing to this standard. i need to respect women who do not perform this standard. this is not about whether or not i am a sinner for wearing makeup."

Why does it feel weird and intimate to mention that someone was in even the most innocuous of your dreams? Sorry my subconscious decided to think about you for a second. You were a curator at an ice cream museum that was also my second grade classroom. If you even care.

you jacked off to a photograph of a penios? 🤨 why?

hey.. two people were asking about you… so i gave them your address and phone number… their names were Skeletal Warrior and Skeletal Ice Mage

just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.

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you relapsed on yearning again didn’t you

remember that guy that had a single auditory hallucination that told him he had a brain tumor and the exact location and then he went to the doctor and it was fucking right

i don’t know why you’re being a bitch when it would actually be great for lesbians (and everyone ) if people (like the woman in the op) realized they don’t have to date and can be happy/fulfilled alone. like that’s kind of the solution… instead of trying to sub in women that they aren’t for real into because they don’t enjoy dating men, they can just… opt to not date.