as easy as i breathe

volleyball is the catalyst for everyone’s character arcs in the series. it’s precisely because of volleyball that their worlds are altered, what makes them grow as players and people. it’s due to volleyball that they learn to come into their own as people no matter what that journey looks like or where they eventually end up. i get it’s certain people who are saying, “it’s just about playing volleyball” to be dismissive but like, objectively, that statement isn’t wrong. i don’t know if i’m managing to articulate what i mean here but i just think it’s so great that hq really is just about playing volleyball. and that furudate wrote all 402 chapters, created all of these characters with emotionally moving development with which to say, “yes this story is volleyball. all of this is precisely what volleyball is. it is living and life itself.”

YES i completely agree with you! that’s what i think is so, so beautiful about hinata and kageyama’s relationship with each other and how intricately furudate wrote them throughout the series. they are two separate individuals who both grew into their own, but at the same time it was the other that spurred every important moment of their growth. i also love what you say about how growth isn’t linear or the same for everyone. maybe this is somewhat related but i can’t help but think about this in terms of the revelations ch 387 brought, particularly kazuyo’s words to kageyama at the end: someone who’s even stronger will come along and find you. like...hinata from the moment kageyama first played against him in that middle school match was always kageyama’s someone stronger. like yes, this unskilled clumsy scrawny kid who barely knows how to play volleyball was kageyama’s “someone stronger” from day one because of what hinata DID have: his passion for the game, his drive to win, his natural athleticism. kageyama saw all this, saw all that hinata could BE, saw in him a true rival he could finally go all out to compete with, and from the moment they became teammates at karasuno kageyama never hesitated to keep racing forward in his own growth because he always had complete confidence hinata would catch up to his side without fail, and might even overtake him if he lets his guard down or becomes complacent (suddenly am thinking about this compared to oikawa’s anxiety about kageyama’s growth overtaking him but that is DEFINITELY another 5k essay ksdjfh)

in the beginning hinata needed kageyama’s skill to have a place on the court and make up for his shortcomings while conversely kageyama needed hinata’s athleticism to learn and evolve into the setter he would eventually culminate into during inzk (i.e. birth of the quiet king). it was hinata who “recrowned” kageyama during that practice match against dateko, essentially telling him it’s okay to be who you are, to not shy away from it because communication is a two-way street, and what’s a setter anyway if they don’t take the initiative to lead the plays? it was kageyama from the beginning who was always telling hinata why the role of decoy is absolutely something to take pride in and when hinata finally realizes this for himself during kmmd and lets go of the little giant ideal kageyama’s just like, “took you long enough.” there’s so many other examples of them being the catalyst for each other’s growth but this is already getting long lmao

hinata had to come to his own understanding that he can’t rely on kageyama forever and in order to hold his own he needs to learn everything starting with the basics, which is all spurred on by kageyama’s invitation to the all japan youth camp and his, “guess i’ll be going on ahead.” when washijou told him, “without kageyama i don’t see any value in you as a player” hinata already knew this. so he stops and begins to observe, to analyze the game for the first time. kageyama was confronted with his kitaichi trauma again when atsumu called him a goody two shoes, making him question himself as well as all the progress he’s made so far. he knew his old ways were wrong, but now he’s confronted with the possibility that the way he is currently isn’t the solution either and he can’t figure out why. when he criticizes noya during that dateko practice match, he’s visibly stricken but it’s hinata who tells him it’s okay to voice what you think, if we don’t like what you say we’ll let you know. you’re safe here on this team. hinata is also the one who pushes kageyama to his limits and challenges his abilities as a setter during the inzk match which i’ve already talked about before in my threat (trust) post

this is so nice of you, thank you!!

the relationship between nekoma and karasuno is so much about gratitude and giving back. the way both teams help each other out, genuinely care about and support each other – just that sense of respect and camaraderie. this feeling is expressed particularly in the relationship between teacher and disciple, senior and junior. it’s in ukai’s desire to take on the coaching position despite his earlier refusals. it’s in the nekokara third years’ relationship with each other. it’s at the heart of who kuroo is and why he loves volleyball. it’s kenma’s “thanks for getting me into volleyball. i like it.” it’s tsukishima’s gratitude to kuroo (and bokuto) exemplified through his growth as a middle blocker. this mutual support and reciprocal give-and-take is at the very heart of the nekoma-karasuno bond itself.

hearing about a possible reunion with nekoma is the only thing that persuades ukai jr to take on the coaching position at karasuno. this relationship that began with ukai’s grandfather and coach nekomata is a rivalry that’s been passed on through the decades. it’s not only about wanting to win, but at its core it’s wanting to fulfill a promise 50 years in the making. ukai wants to make this match a reality for his grandfather, but also for himself because he’s also inherited this dream in his own time. it’s been passed down to the current third years as well but they’ve also made this dream their own; their rivalry with each other is their own. it’s both parties pushing each other to grow and every individual pulling their own, digging deep within themselves to discover what volleyball means to them, that they were able to make this match happen. daichi all but said this as he shook kuroo’s hand at the start of the game: “we never would’ve gotten here without you.” 

by lowering the net, coach nekomata opened up a new world for kuroo and pretty much altered his life’s trajectory. his support for karasuno and helping both his own teammates and karasuno’s team improve is in large part to make the battle of the garbage heap a reality, but most importantly is his way of expressing his gratitude for what volleyball gave him. it’s his way of giving his thanks to nekomata, whose gesture of kindness all those years ago is what opened this door for him in the first place.

it’s both teams showing their gratitude for each other by working to collectively realize this dream, this promise of one day playing each other in an official match despite the distance that separates them. they can finally play to the best of their abilities in this long-awaited match, stepping on the court as equals, which was cultivated by both teams teaching and learning from the other. the way they are still teaching and learning from each other during the game, complimenting and motivating each other between the net throughout the match. at the end of the day they’re all just friends. even though this is the high-stakes, “instant death” game they’ve all been dreaming of, in the heat of the moment during certain rallies when the adrenaline’s at an all time high, this game feels just like any other of their practice matches in a suburban high school gym on a hot summer’s day in tokyo.

nekoma’s “stay connected” banner is not only representative of one of the main themes in hq regarding volleyball, but as many of them do this message goes beyond that. it’s the way nekomata and ukai sr stay connected throughout their lives. it lives on in ukai jr and the revival of the nekoma-karasuno bond. it’s hinata and kenma promising to play each other again the next year. it’s all of them staying connected even after high school. volleyball is what brought all of them together and helped forge this unbreakable bond; volleyball changed their lives individually but their influence on each other is key to the kind of teams they’ve both become.

there’s something so poetic about kiyoko, who’s spent so much of her past years running towards finish lines, racing back to tokyo metropolitan gymnasium facing this final finish line head on. when you’ve put so much of yourself practicing running towards the end as fast as possible that you don’t even realize what’s happening until you’ve run your last race and everything you’ve worked for is over. when you’ve been running so fast that the present can’t keep up with you and the accumulated backlog of time crashes into you all at once you’ve finally stopped.

kiyoko’s story is of someone who has learned it’s okay to care about what matters to you even if it doesn’t seem like all that much, even if it’s only temporary, and to make the most of it because while you can’t outrun the ending you can still keep pace with the present.

so as someone who’s all too familiar with endings, and as the volleyball club manager, it’s her job to think about what happens when all of this ends. she won't let another ending blindside her again and she does all she can to leave what she's helped to build in good hands. because while she might not be there to see it through to the very end, what is there deserves to continue on. because all of this is so much more than just her brief participation in it.

maybe she can't control the passage of time, maybe she's not a player on the court, maybe she only has a pair of shoes in her hands but it's still all part of something so much bigger than herself. this is her final role to fulfill right now and this right now is her final race. a final race against time, with time, and towards it.

there’s no victory or defeat waiting for her at the end, but it’s about the meaning she’s imbued into all she’s done and especially her ownership of it. it’s the mark she’s made, the contributions she’s passed on to yachi her successor who will carry out what she started, then yachi’s successor who will carry on this legacy, and so on and so on.

kiyoko’s role may be ending soon, but there is so much more to her than these past three years in the club, than just this one thing, than just her brief stint in track and field, and there will be so much more to karasuno vbc after she leaves its doors for the last time.

maybe it's only a pair of shoes that doesn’t belong to her, but it’s her duty right now to get them back. maybe she’s just one small link in a long chain of events, but every link needs to exist in order to connect to the other.

“something you’ve poured your heart into can all just end one day, far faster and with far less fanfare than you’d expect.”

ch 287 | ch 400

the duality of sand, and what it means to begin again

their brief time together in brazil highlights how relationships and one’s perceptions of another change with time, age and experience. hinata, who used to be intimidated by the imposing grand king, is now seeing him laugh, trip and stumble in the sand. hinata, who in oikawa’s eyes was clumsy and unskilled, is now teaching him how to play beach. it’s seeing the other at their most vulnerable, this openness that allows them to connect with each other in a way they never would’ve been able to if they were both still in japan.

it was practically fate they met each other at the right place, right time. both of them being what the other needed the most. oikawa cheering hinata up in the depths of his loneliness and homesickness. hinata helping oikawa remember volleyball is fun. oikawa who was struggling to get somewhere and hinata reminding him of where oikawa had been before he’d ever gotten anywhere.

the way it was hinata, who started with nothing, who reminds oikawa what it felt like when he started out. hinata, who we watched build and establish his roots throughout the series, that reminds oikawa of his own. hinata shouyou from the concrete who reminds oikawa the grand king what it feels like to begin again.

there’s the symbolism of sand, its unsteadiness that forces you to get back to your roots, to start anew. for something that’s soft and has so much give, it mercilessly doesn’t let you get away with anything, yet is forgiving and gentle as you work to build yourself back up again, stronger than before. “relearning from the ground up, one more time.” it’s relearning what it means to truly connect to one other person because in beach, you only have one other ally on the same side of the net. both in beach and right now on the other side of the world, hinata and oikawa are the only allies the other has. both in beach and right now in brazil, this partnership is merely momentary--what does it mean to connect when the other is all you have?

hinata reminds oikawa the exhilaration of learning something new, being a beginner at something again, and feeling driven to get better at it. for oikawa, brazil--hinata--was a reset. being able to play with no pressure, to lose yourself in the game, to lose the game itself, all for the sake of just playing. that simple-minded goal of trying something you just learned again and again until you get it being your sole driving force, game scores themselves be damned. it doesn’t matter. not here, not right now.

only in those fleeting few days, in that one moment they were able to play these roles for each other. in brazil, only during this transient moment, they were both able to exist outside of their preconceived notions of each other. this unspoken acknowledgment between the other that japan oikawa and japan hinata are as far away as their home country itself. once opponents, now teammates who learn what it means to trust in someone else in a foreign and unforgiving realm.

the way both of them were feeling stuck and unmoored in foreign countries but it was happening upon the other through a chance encounter that helped ground each of them within this uncertain point of time in their lives. brazil was a brief interlude that was so ephemeral but helped give both of them the comfort and confidence to keep moving forward in their journeys to the top with renewed vigor.

they both remembered what it feels like to confidently take on a challenge, because you are invincible when you start at the bottom, when there’s nowhere else to go but up.

and the exploration of being good despite being short vs being good period. “i’ve known for a long time just how short and weak i really am.” hoshiumi finding his freedom and thus his strength in working towards being better. playing with the mindset of not trying to make up for a lack of height, but simply to be a better player period. hinata letting go of the little giant ideal and embracing what it means to be himself, the greatest decoy. “we aren’t limited to only one way of being great.”

asahi’s breakthrough and learning to trust in himself, getting to see his own “view from the top.” tsukishima allowing himself to want to put up a fight against monsters, to compete with hinata individually. the conclusion of washijou's arc, watching hinata gaming the limitations of height itself to fight his way to the top. takeda's “this too is volleyball” speech to hinata. the culmination of a team’s growth, all the lessons learned and the lessons yet to learn. that this is not the end, but merely a stepping stone in everyone’s journeys

for today, you happen to be the defeated. but what will you become tomorrow?