broken compass

young old person tip for you all. go get some photos printed (pauses so someone can say bogos binted) and fill out a physical album

and annotate them with who is in the photos and when and where the photos were taken!!! your extended family 50 years from now will be grateful, and so will you if you end up forgetting any details

(sprints into room late, looking harried and frantic as fuck) bogos binted. did I miss it

there are’m only 23 types of people in the world

I just had 3 crackers with chutney and sharp white cheddar . Then i had a ring of pineapple. I started to levitate, but i wasnt scared. Im not scared of anything

Do you wanna go watch the sunlight pierce the leaves of the forest with me?

one time i told a group of lesbian and bi women that i have never watched wicked and they were shocked, gagged, gooped, “but you’re queer. you like pussy. how have you not seen wicked?” yeah. well. i like pussy, not musicals?

“are you going to the lucy dacus concert?” no. i listen to gucci mane.