Why is it already 2026🙃😭😐

I warned her. I warned my Iron Warriors painting buddy that this would happen if she doesn't shut up about our High Marshal

I cannot wait to receive my payment for painting this batch of Ultramarines. That limited edition Knight Of The Throne is going to be displayed right next to the Helbrecht cutout

I even invested in a $5 wax seal so that I can attach purity seals to all my letters (we're penpals too 😅) to her

"Why did your chapter do that? What is wrong with you?"

I am going to ignore your question and hand you a purity seal that says because the God Emperor said we can

I bought Hammer Of Olympia cos she agreed to buy Crusaders Of Dorn. Now she's complaining about Bayard too 🙄

*ahem*

I need to remove my Templar helmet for a moment to say something... and I say this as I hold my precious brothers in my hand as proof of my love for our holy chapter:

But...

Maybe we should stop recommending Black Templars/Iron Warriors books to each other cos honestly, cos of the way our chapter/legion behaves, we're just making ourselves look bad 😭

After reading an Iron Warrior book, I'll literally ask her if her legion is just full of petty spiteful assholes

And she like "Yes 😔"

And after she reads a Black Templars book she'll ask me if my chapter is just full of crazy people

And I'm like "Yes 😤"

Helbrecht will say the most insane thing ever and everyone around him will shout PRAISE BE

Like no??? It's such a bad idea?? Isn't anyone going to tell him this is a bad idea?? Are we really going to let our dear High Marshal smash his head through a ceramite wall to make a window??

If the task is making a window in a ceramite wall so the civilians can have some nice fresh air,

Helbrecht is the guy who managed to break a hole in the wall with his hard head

Then depending on his mood, he may or may not accuse the people who didn't bash their heads into the wall with him of heresy

Bayard is the guy who doesn't know what a window is, then when someone tries to explain to him, he yells that the window is made of witchcraft and we need to destroy all windows NOW

He is also very rude and crabby about it

And Priamus is such a kiss ass. He's the guy who's shouting YES MY LORD when Bayard says that we should burn all the window cos windows are foul witchery

Okay I guess when I put a vintage mini next to Brother Ludwig, he doesn't look thaaat tiny 🤣

But he's seriously so small compared to Brother Ansel though 😅

I wonder what I should wrote on my Redemptor Dreadnought 🤔

I went with "Ludwig, Dorn, Exalt/Sacrifice/Slaughter" "For The Glory Of The Emperor" for Brother Ludwig

And "Terra" "Fire In The Darkness" for Brother Ansel

I wanted Brother Ansel to be more protector/champion of the guard coded? So I quoted Grimaldus for his text

Cos he's oath brothers with the brave Cadian 107th who risked their lives to protect his unconscious mangled body. If you attack his Cadian little brothers he will demolish you 🤣

I think my fav part of this mini is their matching 107 markings 🤣. I thought it would be cute to make it look like the Cadians spray painted 107 on his leg 🤣

Ludwig is pious (fanatical) and Ansel is protective, so I'm thinking of making Brother Redemptor Dreadnought a knight..? I bought a huuuge resin sword. I think I'm gonna give it to him. It's huge like the Moonlight Great Sword

I also haven't decided what head I'm going to use for Brother Redemptor Dreadnought. I made it a point to choose faces with different features... but my painting buddy said that they still look like twins cos they are both bald 😐

She also said they look like Horus. They do not look like Horus, how dare she ಠ_ಠ

She should consider painting Blood Angels instead of Iron Warriors since she's clearly hallucinating ಠ_ಠ

Insulting him isn't going to change the plot of the book

I also want to say that the Iron Warrior in the book deserved to get purged cos not only are they traitors, they are dumbasses

They are the one who started this by provoking Helbrecht

And they thought destroying his only ship after provoking him was a fantastic idea. That ship was the only way the Black Templars could get off your planet

They aren't stranded here with you. YOU are stranded here with them

This is literally like forcing 2 guys who are screaming that God is giving them visions (+ their angry friends who are yelling hymns while they slaughter your local population) into a room with you... then throwing away the key

The Perturbed Turbo audio book is apparently only $4 now... so she says I have no excuse not to listen to it...

But she needs to buy Crusaders of Dorn cos it's on offer too