heartcries

into You

if God would love me the same way i love him, how true would that love be?

i have always longed for a place where eternity exists and time is not bound by the rising nor the setting of not even a thousand suns; . my feet have always searched for an expanse where gravity is no force where they can walk on water and dance with the wind, where they can wander and never be lost; . my eyes have always known a face that i have never seen as if beauty is so much more than what surrounds me, it's beyond me; . my heart has always belonged to a place to a space to a face to a heart that i now know are yours; . i have always searched, now y o u a r e h e r e t h i s i s m y f a v o r i t e p l a c e .

love always hopes and i hope that when the butterflies have gone and the stars have lost their glimmer, when my youth has faded and my eyes have become jaded, you would still hope for me to come home to you . love always protects so i protect keep sacred the heart of my lover that you, always, before me. always. . love always trusts and i trust not my senses that not nearness or pleasantries not warmth or melodies will ever tell why you hold the most special place in my heart. . love always perseveres and i will never stop even if you lose your hope in us and your arms no longer wait for me to come home, even if it's always you before me first and your senses have gotten a hold of your trust, i will never leave. i will always stay. . love always, it's always you.

is only because you let me go.

afraid.

and no matter how much it hurt i will always choose to remember only the b e s t parts of you . and if i ever find myself in the past i will always visit the moments i only wished to b u t did not last

it's surrender a daily laying down of the self of the struggles, of the trials of every pain ever felt it's surrendering in faith not in fear it's believing apart from Him you are nothing there is no good thing acknowledging He is everything it's obedience a willing abidance in times of need, of hurt, of doubt in every season of your life it's following without questions trusting beyond emotions it's knowing he holds all things, perfects all things all on his own time it's sacrifice a sincere offering of your favorite things of overdue strings and flings of your treasures it's giving beyond limits an immeasurable overflow a result of surrender a reason for obedience it's expecting he will meet your needs He will heal you when you bleed He will hear you when you plead extravagant worship is more than hands raised up in the air more than eyes closed without a care more than spoken and unspoken words extravagant worship is a daily laying down of the self a willing abidance in times of need of hurt, of doubt a sincere offering of your favorite things.

I can write about the beauty of fall and the intensity of snow based only on how I imagine them to be. I've never seen oranges and reds fashionably spread out on the ground nor have I felt soft white ice touch my skin and give me chills. That's how I write about you, about us. Based only on how I would like us to be. That you'd wrap your arms around me and dance to the song you wrote for me. I've never heard you breathe those three little big words people say to people they can't live without nor have I been moved by your zeal as you love me gently, slowly yet fiercely. But I would like to know. I know we'll conquer it all. But until then, I'll just write about the snow. And the beauty of fall.

the farther, the harder. but i'm not talking about physical distance. i'm talking about the incalculable space between us even when we are just an inch apart.

so love, even if it’s silent, sings over me.

should i wish on stardust or wait for 11:11, maybe throw a penny in a fountain? or should i just fall on my knees ask so i'll receive and pray until i see that You, You never left me

it feels so good to know that someone as lovely as you loved someone as lonely as me but was it also good to know that a love too good to be true was just all of your pretending?