The Scaled Shadow

It takes a few seconds for his heartbeat to calm back down. He often pretended that he had skin of stone, but for those that could hear or sense his heart, that would in turn show him to be an imposter. He swallows, waves it off. “No harm done, just a few years off my life I suppose.” He does move to pile his papers and books up, the words started to not make sense, and his eyes tired of the candlelit strain. He wonders, not for the first time today, where the wired lenses he normally kept in his pocket, had gone to.

“Oh?” he hums, he’s not sure where the rest of them are but, “Some took a break, much to the chagrin of the ones who think they’re in charge,” he shrugs. He was told not to charge while he was in these walls, and had they been on the streets, Cal knew everything had a price. But he sighs, “I came here to get away from the other healers, anything I can do to help?”

~

Keeva’s own heart pounded hurriedly in her chest, though hers raced out of nervousness. She felt uneasy, now more than ever, interacting with new people. Not only had her fight made her slightly more skittish, a deep unease settling in her stomach that she hadn’t been able to shake, but it had also made her more distrustful. Being alone with any stranger now set her nerves on edge. 

“Well it seems they were pulled away by something but—“ she shrugged, and winced slightly as the movement still caused a streak of pain down her back. When he implied he was a healer himself, even offering help to Keeva, she blinked in surprise. “Oh I—“ she hesitated, wrestling with that distrust a moment before giving into her impulsiveness and her impatience. “Well, I was actually looking for a healer for myself. I um- my back is quite badly cut and I was hoping to see if someone could take a look at it.” 

The dragoness knew healing magics could function differently for each user and she wasn’t sure if the mage across from her would actually need to see her back. If so he would no doubt notice the markers of her true nature, the scales scattered across her shoulders, and she debated just pulling back her hood outright. No sense in hiding it further in that case. But she already felt bad for startling him once so she chose what she decided was a middle ground. “I don’t know if it matters,” she spoke up in a somewhat tentative voice. “but I’m dragonkin. I know we heal differently but I didn’t know if that would affect things.”

-

It was a boon to have a good student who took instructions quickly and although she had taught very few how to fight and fend for themselves over the years, Gwen once thrived in training others. She recalled the days when she would teach her siblings and the tribe members how to fight and best defend against the sloppy fighting styles of humans, how best to use their elven senses and agility, and how to get out of a situation quickly if need be. But she pushed those thoughts and those memories back, they were all gone after all. And she might have made a mistake in not staying with them but she wouldn’t make the same mistake for Keeva. She was a young dragon who needed real guidance and in the world they lived in, it was imperative she knew how to fight.

And although Gwen did enjoy a good brawl, this was different. There was only the smallest moment of amusement passing over her features as Keeva moved to block her blow. “Good. Next time, move with the blow, someone stronger than me might have broken your arm.”

Gwen steadied herself again, sweeping her leg in a circle as she jumped, shifting her weight from her front to back leg. “Avoid, assess, adjust.” She shrugged quickly, “Not always in that order… but you get it. I’ll show you… swing at me like that.”

She waited for the dragon to ready herself to strike as she got into her own stance. She motioned for Keeva to strike, “If you can avoid a blow, it gives you a few seconds to put distance between you while they get back on their feet.”

~

Keeva nodded hurriedly at the elf’s words. Pale eyes still watching every movement, every shift in weight as if she were one of the wild cats they had heard earlier. Her heart thrummed heavily in her chest, not from effort but from excitement, the small thrill that came from combat whether that be mock or not. 

But it quickened as Gwen asked her to swing at her. Not that she expected to hit the woman- she could always pull back if need be- but she did feel that small inkling of fear at the thought of accidentally hurting her. She swallowed that fear as she was motioned forward. Taking a fraction of a second to decide before she lunged and swung her arm out towards Gwen.

To her surprise, the movement wasn’t halted though, and the other wildling used that momentum to set her off balance. Keeva found herself quickly about to meet the ground and instinctively she breathed out darkness to stop the impact. As she would have made contact with the ground, she instead sunk into a cluster of shadows, quickly solidifying a few feet away from her original position. She looked up at Gwen apologetically. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to, well I mean I did- but it was just a reflex kind of. Do we need to do that again? I can not use shadows this time.”

It was quiet.

That’s all Callahan looked for after what felt like too busy of a day. He spent what felt like weeks travelling, when it was just a set of favors to griffn riders and the like, to arrive at the tower to quickly be thrown in to doing a hundred menial tasks that the mage felt to be beneath him.

So yes, of course, at the first second some older, greyed woman wasn’t barking orders at him, he fled with a series of books and his notes to read and study in a spot of solitude. He was sprawled out across a table and was so focused on the words he was reading that when he heard a voice he fumbled his quill and missed the inkpot and had he not called the water of the ink to still and return fast enough, he would have had a mess on his hands, literally.

“By the gods, I think you should invest in a bell on your neck,” he says after a second, waiting for his heart to slow.

But surely, Cal being unaware that there was a second person on the balcony was not all her fault, he was to blame too for not being aware of his surroundings. But he always fell in to some.. haze when reading. It made him jumpy when broken out of it, that was his problem.

~

Keeva was usually quiet, not just in voice but in the way she moved. A dragon's natural grace and years of stealthing through the swamp made it an unconscious habit to move silently. It wasn’t something she even noticed until she found herself living in the small cottage with two humans. She felt the hum of magic as she startled the man, and she realized he hadn’t noticed her until she spoke. 

-

Perhaps in more ways than they realized, they were similar. Josefin had grown up learning how to manage her emotions around different types of people. It was politically necessary and ensured her survival at the worst of times and her accomplishments in the best case scenarios. After all, no one wanted to listen to an emotionally compromised princess. Well… few wanted to listen to a princess in general but she’d forced her way into some situations by maintaining that control and her ideas. But Keeva, she had grown up thinking it was better to push it all down. She’d grown up learning to ignore and regret her emotions and even her thoughts and in many ways, she’d grown up being invalidated by her mother and then likely herself.

“Mmm…” Josefin nodded, listening as Keeva explained her relation to the dragon.  Her own family might have been compromised with the rebellion but they hadn’t always been so distant. Growing up, she and her siblings had always stuck together. Their parents were too busy and it was difficult leaning on anyone else or letting anyone else in. She couldn’t even imagine if any of them had been bastards. Her parents had always been notoriously in love and faithful to each other. “I suppose… we’re lucky in that way. All my siblings and I were born in wedlock to the same parents. They have always been the picture of a happily married couple too… I never would have though…” She sighed, I never would have thought Beric could be a traitor. Though in truth, she wasn’t convinced he was. “The things I do know of him are mostly through Adaline… they’re… uh… Rather close…” Josefin wasn’t exactly sure how close but she knew her sister and her affections.

Josefin smiled warmly, shaking her head at Keeva. “That’s alright, penmanship isn’t that important. It’s the content that is.” She chuckled lightly, a memory with Améla brandishing itself. “When I was little… I broke my arm and leg in an accident… I had to learn to write with my other hand. For years, no one could read what I was writing. My tutors would have me dictate my notes or letters to a staff member if they needed to read them…” It didn’t help that she was a child anyway at that point and had all of the motor skills of a roughly eight year old. “Generally… I prefer reading to writing or drawing or anything anyway and I’m sure your handwriting is more than adequate. But if you’d like, I can help you practice.”

“So do I…” She breathed, turning her face upward, as if searching for the sun under the shade of the palm tree. “It is… It’s quiet… there are so many rare books and tomes in the magaesterium… more than I could read in a lifetime… this is what I’d always dreamed, I supposed…” She peeked out from beneath her lashes when Keeva mentioned Kirian and simply shook her head. “Kirian loves Loqoala, he mostly grew up here… he got to be the most… free from his parents here. I don’t know how much that helped though.”

“Don’t you start though…” She laughed, though a faint blush had colored her cheeks. Her relationship with Kirian was simple but their situation was complicated. They loved each other but it looked like fate and the fate Kirian was choosing would keep them apart. “I wouldn’t say he’s a lost cause… but he’s absolutely made up his mind. So I might not like his decision or agree with it… but it’s his… it’s his version of justice. And I’ll support him until the end…” Whichever of their ends came first, at least.

~

“Wedlock…” Keeva mulled over the word for a moment. It was a word she had heard before but never really had much context for. It was a foreign concept and she wondered if it was solely human or shared by elves as well.  The mention of Josefin’s siblings was a reminder of how much the Princess’ world had changed too. How much she was going through while still being so helpful. 

“You spent a lot of time with Adaline before the masquerade, yes? I mean I know you said you were twins and close-” The memory of immediately after Valarr and she parted ways nearly a century ago came to mind and she continued. “I ask because I know it is hard to be away from the person you are closest to and- well, I mean I know you have been away before- and you said you were in the military so I’m sure things were uncertain at times but—“ she stammered before shaking her head a moment and collecting her words. “I’m trying to say that I understand it is difficult to unexpectedly be separated from your closest friend with no clue if you’ll see them again and I’m sorry.” She squeezed Josefin’s hand lightly hoping that her weak attempt to put together the correct words made sense. Keeva knew she wasn’t good at communicating but she needed the Princess to know that she wanted to be able to listen to or support Josefin in return. 

Keeva snorted lightly, laughing at the image in her head of a tow-headed young Josefin stubbornly trying to write out something legible with an arm and a leg in splints. Her smile fell to an embarrassed one when Josefin offered to assist improving her penmanship. “Oh I— I mean, only if you have time. Otherwise I can manage just fine, I’ve just never been too good at it. I mostly just draw but he doesn’t seem to mind much.” At first, she was unsure if her brother would like the small doodles she included on the letters to fill some of the blank space. But it quickly became apparent that he was unphased, even encouraging the drawings and she had since made them a greater part of their correspondence.

Keeva was too restless to wait much longer. It was the whole reason she sought out a healer in the tower in the first place. Her injuries were healing but they were severe enough that they required her to be resting and that they be tended to. She hated it, hated being cared for, feeling like a burden. Being told she wasn’t supposed to be moving around only made her more restless, more stir crazy. And her moving only aggravated her wounds. So she went looking for a healer. Hoping magic could speed up the process, only to be told that they were currently occupied but she could wait.

After what felt like nearly an hour, the dragoness couldn’t sit still any longer. She would return later and hopefully they would be back. But for now, she would take advantage of being outside the cottage for the first time in a few days. She found the steps leading to one of the higher areas of the tower and slowly made her way up.

They opened up onto a decent sized rooftop balcony, a few chairs and small side tables scattered about. As she stepped out, she was momentarily taken aback by the wonderful view of the darkening evening sky. She was half tempted to pull her hood away for a better view but she refrained. The dragoness was more hesitant about showing her face now since the attack. But the sound of paper behind her surprised her and she whipped around. It seems the balcony wasn’t as vacant as she thought and she cursed herself for not being more observant.

“Oh! I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize anyone else was up here.”

“Ha,” Avi exclaimed, wanting to grin more if it wasn’t for the bruising and lacerations on his face, and the heaviness in his heart.  He didn’t mind a bit of humour even now, though.  Despite everything being terrible, it felt good to tease and have them tease him right back.  Especially Keeva, especially after she’d suffered at the claws of her brother.  

And the rebellion.  They did this, after all.  Not Cailean.  He was a victim as much as Keeva was.

He looked relieved, when Keeva agreed to promise about Kirian.  “Thank you, luv.  It will mean a lot to me.”

There was a newfound surprise suffused with pleasure, when Keeva quoted Avi back to him.  Words he said to her once, what seemed like ages ago in the camp outside of Glasswater.  How remarkable, that she would remember.  How good it felt, to know that even with one person, his words held merit.  It wasn’t that Avi was unused to giving orders or making his decisions carry weight.  But there was a difference, his mother once told him, between making someone obey, and inspiring them to obey.  

Keeva wasn’t his subject, nor was she his peer.  Dragons were of their own selves, hardly subject to the whims or laws of humans.  So it wasn’t about her obeying Avi, so much as knowing she’d…heard him.  

“Only you could be this sort of good to me, darling Keeva,”  Avi praised her warmly.  He reluctantly let her go.

It was alarming to see just how much she still ailed, as she stood.  “And shadow-walking won’t hurt you further?”  Avi asked, to make sure.  But Keeva seemed determined, and Avi wouldn’t try to stop her.  He smiled instead, rather sadly. 

“I wish I could keep you.” He’d miss her presence.  Even injured and trounced, it was always comforting to have a dragon present.  

“Indeed.  I completely missed noticing and spikes.  I should love to see them, and enjoy your beauty.  Thank you again, Keevs.  I won’t forget what you did for us - for me - today.”

~

Keeva’s grin broke into a smile as Avi seemed bolstered by hearing his own words. She hoped he understood that she did not forget those kindnesses. And that he could heed his own words as well. 

“No I will be fine. Honestly, I think it may be easier than actually walking at the moment.” A twitch of her hand pulled shadows from the corners of the cabin. They stretched across the planks, snakes of inky darkness, gathering around her feet. 

Looking up as Avi spoke again, she returned his sad smile. Part of her felt overwhelmingly protective in that moment. Of Avi, of the denizens of the ship. Perhaps it was her instincts left over from the last 50 years protecting the tribe. Or something she picked up from Kirian, an echo through their potential bond. She wasn’t sure, but she knew she needed to get back. They seemed confident in their safe arrival and she was in no state to be anything but in the way. 

A pang of guilt shot through Keeva at his thanks, still feeling as though it was not enough. But she pushed it down, giving him a nod and another small smile in return.  

“Be safe, Avi.” The shadows curled up around her like a cloak, and her form sunk into them entirely before they dissipated once more, leaving Avi alone in the cabin. 

Inktober Prompt: Red

AKA If Xi’mia got the chance to dress Keeva aka Keeva Asfahal Edition

“Yes, yes of course you care.  You care about everyone, from your new friends to that pretty blue butterfly you spotted two days ago,”  Avi half-joked.  “You have a lot of care to give around, my dear.  I’m sure of it.”  He was only teasing but it was self-deprecating in a way as well.  It wasn’t that he didn’t believe Keeva cared, it was more that he didn’t put too much merit in it.  It was a sweet sentiment, and she was a sweet and likeable person, but that was just her nature.  She didn’t know what else to be.

Although watching her as that beautiful, terrifying iridescent dark dragon fighting for all she was worth in the sky…that was magnificent.  Power and ferocity.  Avi’s eyes flared at the memory.  That was a Keeva he was interested in seeing more of.  That wildness in her, that intertwined with her kindness, those conscious choices she made to be a lovely person. 

 It wasn’t his ordain to order her about though…unless she and Kirian found their way to Rajayer. Granted, Kirian’s promise meant…  

“Oh fuck me, Kirian’s promise,” he whispered to himself.  Kirian had said that when he’d performed the ritual, he’d return to Rajayer.  Only, the ritual had failed, by Keeva’s account.  Avitej looked at Keeva.  

“Listen to me.  When you return to Kirian and the Princess, you must keep looking for a way to save her, alright?  You and Kirian both.  Your duty is not yet done to her.  Tell Kirian I said that.  He must keep trying until she is saved or the Gods take her to the After.”  And Avi hoped it would be the former, but he couldn’t help feeling relief that either way, it would take a bit longer.

The gods certainly twisted fate in surprising ways.

He focused back on Keeva, and smiled when she took a hold of his hand.  His expression softened completely, becoming rather boyish, even a bit shy.  “Most people mock me for my heart.  But what use is striving for good, if your motivation is guilt or self-doubt.  Better to do things for others out of love.”

That was Avi’s reasoning.  Granted, he couldn’t see the other side of his philosophy; that love could also be a destructive force, especially if it wasn’t tempered by remorse or self-reprimand.

He kissed Keeva’s hand.  “You can remain here until we reach land if you like, or join me on the deck.  I must return to my ship.”

~

“Yes, plenty. Even for sailors with quick mouths.” Keeva didn’t stop her eye roll or the huffed laugh at his teasing this time and she teased him back, mood lifting slightly. He was right in a sense, she had a large capacity to care for others. Always had. Even now that sometimes got her into trouble when she cared too much or trusted too quickly. But her compassion for others was something she clung to despite that. Something to offset the more wild nature in her. 

“Promise? I don’t know—“ But she stopped as Avi continued speaking, his tone insistent. His demand that not only she keep searching but Kirian as well caused her brow to furrow in confusion but she nodded. “Of course. I told you I’m not giving up. I don’t think Kirian will either but I will tell him.”

Keeva’s soft smile widened at a side of Avi she hadn’t seen. Almost bashful, something she didn’t think he could be. His words only solidified his point and she nodded. “Then most people are fools to discourage- how did you put it?... a beautiful, outspoken heart?” She grinned, using words he once reassured her with. 

“I should get back.” Keeva nodded when Avi mentioned returning to his ship. Letting go of his hand, the dragoness pushed herself to her feet. It was more of a struggle than she realized it would be and she winced at the pain the movement caused. 

“I can shadow-walk back since I won’t be able to fly. My wings are too torn.” She paused, realizing this was the first time Avi had seen her other form. Something he had been so excited about when they spoke before and now how soiled that had been. She gave him a small sad smile. “Hopefully next time you see me in that form it is not under such dire circumstances and you get a chance to appreciate all the spikes.” She teased but the smile quickly fell from her face as she prepared herself to leave. Replaced by an earnest pleading as she spoke again, much softer than before. “If I hear from him, I will find a way to tell you. If you find anything, please let me know Avi.”

…

“Okay,”  Avi replied to Keeva’s determination to save Josefin.  His brow furrowed for a second at Keeva’s insistence that it was her fault and ergo her responsibility.  Not exactly the best way to look at the situation, putting herself in the centre of Josefin’s doom. But if that was the burden that Keeva insisted on taking upon herself, then Avitej wouldn’t offer any argument.  Everyone had their loads to bear in life, and perhaps for Keeva it was her motivation as well, to assuage her compounding guilt.  

Instead, he just offered Keeva a smile.  “The Princess is blessed to have such determined friends at her side to help her during this hard time.”

Avi was still convinced that Josefin would not survive.  He was impressed that she’d survived this long.  She was a strong one; but she was only human. Their frailty was far more palpable compared to dragons or elves.

Keeva pulled away from touching his scars, but Avi, being a boy, couldn’t help taking it further.  Partially for her curiousity, but mostly because of the bragging rights.  Scars were testaments of bravery and therefore attractiveness, not ugliness.  Not to sailors, anyway.  

“See?  Goes all the way here,” he said, still conversational as he tugged his shirt off his shoulder.  “It hardly hurts anymore.  Just very numb and a little sensitive.”  Unbidden he smiled suddenly, thinking of Catlina using that sensitive scarred skin to toy with in bed.

The smirk vanished as Keeva stammered more apologies, but at least for Avi, his fonder memories with Cat had heightened his mood.  He shook his head over and over and raised his good hand at Keeva’s apology.  

“No luv, I don’t want to hear it.  It’s unnecessary, and foolish to wish for a past you had no fault in and no control over.  Are you an oracle as a little child?  Could you have foreseen any of this; and even if you did, would it have mattered?  The only reason it matters now, Keevs, is because you care.  About Kirian, and Josefin.  Even myself, innit.  Just a bit,” he smiled, looking right at Keeva.

“Don’t cast shame on the little dragonling Keeva for what she couldn’t possibly foresee.  Blame your environment if you like, your wildlings or your mother.  Blame your gods even, if you choose.”  The mother seemed like a good candidate, from what Cailean had said….oh Cai.  

“Blame them and be angry for their injustice against you in the past, that’s your right as an emancipated child.  And then focus on what you can do for your loved ones in the future.  Not through guilt or recompense, but just because you love them.”  Avi raised an eyebrow, feeling his seeping bitterness as Keeva cut herself off; but Avi could fill in what she wanted to say.  She likely wanted to defend Kirian.  Which was probably both damaging and uplifting for Kirian, depending on his mood and how sorry he was feeling for himself at the moment.

“Hhmph.  Seems both you and Kirian have similar trials to overcome.”

~

Keeva hadn’t had the chance to say much of anything to Josefin or Kirian before she practically darted out of the ritual space. She assumed Kirian wouldn’t want to give up either but she wasn’t so sure about the Princess. Perhaps that determination would soon become stubbornness if Josefin called off their search. 

Seeing the brush of scars across Avi’s shoulder only made Keeva’s heart sink even more. Not because of what they were. Like sailors, wildlings seemed to relish in the marks battles left. Signs of bravery and ferocity. She paled, knowing what caused them. Hell, she even knew the dragon who had breathed that fire. Considered him kin. And now her actual kin had wrought more destruction. Leaving what was sure to be visible scars on her and invisible ones for Avi. 

Her string of apologies sputtered out as Avi waved his hand. The pained expression on her face softened. His words pointed out reasoning that she had heard, reasoning she knew to be sound but that her guilt quickly dismissed. But he was right. She had no divination magic, no way of knowing she even had someone out there to bond with let alone what would have happened had she done so years ago. 

“Of course I care, Avi.” She almost rolled her eyes as he teased her even now, a grin twitching unto her face. But she was surprised he could think otherwise. It wasn’t as if they were boon companions but Keeva had few connections and valued those she did make greatly. They were both linked by those they knew, Cailean and Kirian, threads that connected them before they had even known one another. Avi had been one of the first humans she had met in Glasswater. Hell, he was one of the few souls she had truly spoken about her past to, the first in many years. Maybe to Avi, the kindness he shared was common, something expected and easily given. But to someone who had such sparing exposure to genuine humanity, even small acts of kindness were treasured.

When he spoke of her mother she was reminded that part of her did blame the old dragon. Her fear mongering and vitriol that had kept Keeva hostage within her own family. How could she have known about the outside world when her mother worked so hard to keep her from it? 

Not through guilt or recompense, but just because you love them.

The guilt she felt, the blame she placed on herself, was there because of love. Because she cared about how the consequences of her actions affected those she cared for. But the way Avi put things actually made sense to Keeva and she was quiet for a moment as his words sunk in.

Love instead of guilt. 

She would try. Try to forgive herself for things beyond her control-something she had heard repeated by those around her before, but never quite grasped like this. Try to focus that anger into purpose instead. She would do what she could in the future, do better. That had already rooted itself in her mind. She swore to herself she would make sure she was able to defend herself and those she cared about. She would try because she cared and that was enough. 

The dragoness looked back at Avi, a soft smile touching her features. “No one’s ever explained it like that before...I-“ She didn’t know how to explain that she understood, or how much it meant, so she grabbed his hand again and squeezed gently. “-thank you.” 

     INSULT  MINGLED  WITH  INTRIGUE  ,  an  odd  combination  indeed  but  the  bard  was  both  a  vain  and  curious  creature.  what  elena  heard  was  that  there  was  a  place  untouched  by  the  rumors  and  stories  churned  out  by  all  of  the  courts  ,  that  elena  and  her  musical  prowess  did  not  reach  every  corner  of  the  earth.  there  was  a  story  in  keeva’s  admittance  ,  as  much  as  there  was  a  blow  to  elena’s  ego.  

     “  i  cannot  believe  there  is  such  a  place  that  has  not  been  graced  by  my  playing.  ”  elena  declared  ,  a  swig  of  liquor  quickly  following.  the  heat  of  the  drink  reached  even  her  toes  now  and  her  freckles  set  by  a  warm  blush  framing  her  eyes.  words  loosened  from  her  lips  even  quicker  —  though  those  same  words  would  have  been  eventually  said  ,  after  some  thorough  consideration  of  how  insulted  elena  wanted  to  seem.  “  i  will  put  my  shock  aside  if  you  tell  me  about  this  secluded  place  you’re  from.  i  find  that  if  places  do  not  need  me  to  entertain  then  they  must  be  quite  something.  ”    

     after  all  ,  weren’t  bards  enthralled  with  romance  and  glory?  elena  did  not  sing  of  farmers  tending  to  their  crops  or  seamstresses  cutting  thread  —  not  unless  it  concerned  a  magic  pumpkin  or  enchanted  gown.  no  ,  she  sought  out  stories  worthy   to  be  told  and  she  wondered  if  keeva  would  dare  to  share  hers.      

~

“We certainly did not get many visitors and if we did they were usually traders.” Keeva hurriedly tried to reassure. But Elena’s following words, a request of a tale, made the dragoness laugh lightly, despite an uneasiness at the topic of home. But she was willing to share parts of that story, perhaps liberated by her inebriation. Parts she knew were safe to share. 

“Of course! I’m from the swamp just south of here actually. I was told the Elysian name for it is Feifenbog.” She thought she might have gotten the pronunciation right this time if it hadn’t been for the alcohol buzzing in her. The name still came out choppy and she couldn’t help snort a small giggle. “Sorry, I never had a name for it. I lived with wildlings there so we didn’t need one. It was just home.” She smiled at happier memories of the tribe filtered through her warm haze. 

“But we really didn’t get many travelers through the swamp. It’s thick as soup and you’re more likely to get lost or stuck unless you know it well.” The only visitors they had were the traders who braved the route, usually ones that had made the trip before and had history with the tribe. “That and not everyone is too keen on wildlings as it is.” She added with a shrug, recognizing that most wouldn’t risk the trip simply to trade with a wildling tribe. 

-

Gwen’s magic wasn’t the strongest. She could communicate and influence the moods and thoughts of animals but bonding had never been a possibility that she’d considered. She had always used it to her advantage in hunting and rounding up animals but never anything more. And even if she’d never tested or experimented with the extents of her magic, like trying to use her animal bonding with dragons or using the telepathy facet to truly communicate with the animals, she knew she wasn’t capable of that much. She’d also never considered her influencing them to be that much of an intrusion as she made mere suggestions, and whether the animals took them or not wasn’t up to her. Bonding with a dragon though, even if she had the strength in her magic to do so, well… after losing her family, she didn’t think she could.

Gwen circled Keeva once more once she got into… what she probably thought was a stable stance. Gwen tapped the flat side of her dagger against Keeva’s left thigh, “Stay on the balls of your feet. But not your toes. I’d imagine that’s how you walk in your other form. You’ll move faster that way, more capably.” She shifted her boot around Keeva’s back ankle, moving her legs just slightly wider as well. “Shoulder width apart…”

She seemed to get the hang of the stance and Gwen smirked again. She wasn’t good at much, not relationships, not people, not keeping others safe, but she could hunt and she could fight and she knew how to escape and hide. If she could pass that knowledge and those skills on to other dragons, she might be worth something after all. She bolted forward then, taking a quick swing before darting low, swinging her leg toward Keeva’s, to see how well she would maintain her stance.

~

Keeva’s eyes tracked Gwen as she moved around her, appraising her stance. She flinched ever so slightly at the blade on her thigh but she nodded. Other form. The way Gwen explained things made sense and the dragoness shifted her weight forward when the other woman widened her stance for her. Keeva saw another small smirk flit onto Gwen’s face and she focused her attention on defending herself once more. 

Using her magic to try to see where Gwen would strike required more focus than Keeva was used to giving her magic. But as the other wildling darted forward, she felt it. Almost like a tensing of muscles. She felt the intent of the swing before it came and ducked underneath it. Felt the slight breeze as it just missed her.

But then Gwen dropped low. Something Keeva didn’t anticipate. The wildling’s leg swung out and the dragon hurriedly put her arm out to take some of the force. She let out a small grunt as she took the blow against her forearm and calf but her stance didn’t buckle. 

-

“It’s okay…” Josefin said again, trying to soothe Keeva’s concerns. She didn’t know what was going on in Keeva’s mind, or how big of a heartbreak her mother had actually caused her but it seemed to be giving her a lot of undue stress and she felt for her. Being kept away from the world, being told you didn’t fit in, that the world wasn’t good enough for you, or that it was outright evil, it wasn’t something Josefin had experienced but she could relate her own experiences to that. She might not have been kept away from the world by any active choice on the part of her family, but there was always a divide between her station and others. There was always a gap between her and the people she served. “You can take your time with this, we’re not going anywhere for a while.” She smiled softly, “You can work through it at your own pace, in your own ways. Whatever those may be.”

Perhaps because she had met so few dragons personally, and had only observed them from afar while they trained, Josefin hadn’t considered that they had extensive families and lineages as well. They seemed like such solitary people, only forced out of their natural homes by the rebellion, or choosing to go live with their bonded. She wondered if any of them would dare risk coming into human cities if they didn’t have bonded riders to follow or lead. “Cailean? I know him… barely… spent time in the military with him, he’s spent more time with my sister from what I gather since she’s… bonded now.”

Josefin’s expression turned to one of schooled softness. She wasn’t sure if they would find a way to fix her, or if it would work if they did. But Keeva had to believe that, so did Kirian. She needed them to keep faith and hope in their hearts, if their rituals and tests failed. She needed them to move on, to whatever end, whenever her end came. If it came. She hadn’t given up yet, but she wasn’t blind to the possibility of failure.

~

Keeva’s expression softened at Josefin’s words. She wasn’t used to being allowed space and time to work things through. Certainly not in front of anyone else. But even upon their first meeting Josefin had given Keeva the kind of space she needed. The space to breathe and the space to calm down to where she could talk again. And even though she struggled with words, Josefin was still so patient. Gently asking questions, trying to understand, to help Keeva understand. It was a foreign kindness and the dragoness appreciated it wholeheartedly. Especially after everything Josefin had done for her. She nodded, a soft grateful smile echoing Josefin’s patient one. 

“Oh, right, he mentioned you knew one another. We’re siblings. Well, half-siblings I suppose...from what I heard some humans treat that differently.” She still was hazy about the intricacies of human family dynamics so she gave a small shrug and continued. “Regardless, we share a father. I never met our father- my mother wouldn’t talk about him. She told me I had no siblings on that side either. But that was a lie too. Cai tried to come see me, several times over the years, but because he had been among humans and elves my mother told him no.” She shook her head anger welling up again but she was worn out to the point now where it had little energy to fuel it. “I never knew about him until he recognized me at the refugee camp.” She smiled, spirits lifting slightly at the memory. 

“That uh- parchment I write on- the gold one, it sends letters to him.” She glanced to the side a bit embarrassed. The letters hadn’t been something she had tried to actively hide but she often would be writing a response when Josefin or Kirian would come across her and she would quickly tuck the parchment away, hoping they wouldn’t ask. Keeva was still self conscious about her writing. “I’m rather awful at it though. Images are so much easier than words.” 

Josefin’s silence in response to Keeva’s insistence sent a pain through her. She knew there was a possibility that they would fail. That whatever ritual the magi were helping them with here wouldn’t work but Keeva still clung to that determination. She had to. She wouldn’t give up. Neither would Kirian, a fact that became more apparent the more time the dragoness spent around the two humans. 

She sighed and scooted so she could lean against the tree as well. Not releasing Josefin’s hand she rested her chin on her knees as she tucked them to her chest again. Pale gaze looking at the cottage they had been staying in. It was strange, to find herself somewhere so far from home. But at the same time there was something very comfortable about spending quiet days on this warm island with Josefin and Kirian. 

“Rest.” Nymeria let out a soft laugh. “That’s something I know very little about.” She was always on the move. “But you’re right, it is something I should make time for. Cailean as well.” 

Keeva smiled at her tone. It sounded as though she wasn’t one to stay idle long. Something the dragoness felt as well but couldn’t ever act on. “I wish I could say the same.” She laughed lightly. “I feel like I have done too much resting. Staying in one place too long.” She shook her head. “I haven’t had much chance to travel before now.”

…

Avi knew about the plan to save the Princess, because he’d been the one to make it happen.  Or rather, he’d ordered Kirian to get his tortured, mopey arse moving, and do something to regain himself: save the Princess.  The one person who Avi knew Kirian adored.

To find out that it failed, felt like heartbreak.  Avi’s face sagged, as he thought about just how much this would send Kirian spiraling.  His path to finding peace (with himself, or with anyone else) before his death, cut off. And Josefin herself, a doomed creature in an already shattered family.

“I’m…I’m so sorry,” he said, his voice throaty and aching.  Avi pieced the timeline together for Keeva.  She’d been in Illasqa, part of an attempted ritual to save Josefin during the eclipse.  It didn’t work.  In the midst of that grievous disappointment, she noticed her brother flying ahead, bound south towards Rajayer.  And the rest, was what Avi witnessed first hand.

“The gods have forsaken us today, and I don’t know why,” he murmured, truly disconsolate.  It surged over him like a wave, and took him under. Avi just stood there, silent and mourning with the dragoness for what seemed like hours, but was likely only a few seconds.

Time was was a valuable resource after all.  And he was only a human.

Keeva turned her hand up, holding his hand  His rings pressed into her palm, and her claws pressed against his knuckles.  That little pleasant physical sting brought Avi out of drowning in the grief.  Avi gripped her hand just a little tighter, just for the sake of more discomfort.  He wanted it.  Pain was a stimulant, even the dull ache of his arm, the bruising all over his body when he’d gone overboard and smacked into ice.

He wasn’t expecting Keeva to reach out to him though, and Avi reflexively darted his head back first, staring intently into Keeva’s strange dragon-y eyes, until he gauged what she’d wanted.  

His scars.  Avi let go of her hand and touched them first, then brought her hand to his face so she could drag her claws against the numb, smooth skin.  

“The beard hides most of it,” he told her, almost conversationally.  Something people - past lovers mostly, during intimate aftermath - had wondered about.

But he misunderstood why she was apologizing, and Avi shook his head again.  “I was only teasing, Keevs.  Cailean was blood bonded on a mission to - to erm.  To hurt me.”  This was difficult to admit, and Avi hung his head, as it were his fault.

But that brief flash of blame made Avi realize that Keeva wasn’t speaking about her brother.  He looked up at her then, his dark eyes catching the light from outside.

“We were all too late, Keeva,”  Avi replied, tone haunted and sober, edged with obsidian.  “I’m not going to compete with you over which one of us failed Kirian Solgard more.  Me, you, my parents, his parents, the gods…”  He didn’t mention Princess Josefin.  If anyone was the sole beacon of pure untainted goodness for Kirian growing up, Avi guessed it was her.  

“But suffice it to say, I knew him for most of my life, and I couldn’t stop him.  He was no lost or helpless child when he blood-bonded that dragon.  He was an adult.  He knew what he was doing, and he made that choice to kill innocent people.  A split-second is all it takes.”

~

Keeva nodded at Avi’s sympathy. Afraid that if she spoke, she might not be able to hold herself together. Avi sounded as if he was already giving his condolences but Keeva refused to give up. 

“I won’t let her—“ She swallowed thickly against her words. “I’m not giving up, we will find a way. I won’t let her die because of me.” 

The pain in her chest  eased slightly, feeling the metal dig into her palm as his grip tightened. It was a quiet comfort found in that shared pain. Even in the shared grief. In knowing you weren’t the only one drowning in that moment. 

Reaching out hadn’t been polite or appropriate and she had pulled back, realizing as much. But Avi surprised her by bringing her hand to touch his scars. Her hand had lifted of its own accord, perhaps because she was trying so hard to understand. Her fingers brushed the skin, smooth and welted and she remembered the searing pain of dragon fire she felt the day before the festival. She pulled her hand back to her lap, hyper aware of how much Avi, and the people of Loqoala, had suffered under the forced violence of her kin. Perhaps there was some merit to her mother’s words after all, perhaps they had reason to fear and hate. 

But Avi didn’t seem to understand at first. She shook her head, even though he didn’t look at her, head hung and shoulders slumped. When he finally looked up at her and spoke, she frowned at his words. 

I’m not going to compete with you over which one of us failed Kirian Solgard more.

Keeva knew that would have been pointless. Both of them had already decided who was responsible for what happened. Avi’s words ‘he was no lost or helpless child’ only solidified that they had decided differently. And as much as she wanted to argue against his decision, she wouldn’t. Who was she to argue, Avi said it himself, he had known Kirian most his life. Despite their potential bond, she had known Kirian less than three months. Because I choose to cower in a swamp. If I had just left sooner… She shook her head.

“I know. I- I can’t change what happened. But I can still apologize for what I did— or I guess what I didn’t do. And I know it isn’t that simple, but I just-“ She didn’t know what would have been if they had met sooner. If he had become a dragon rider like he was expected to be. But surely it wouldn’t have been that.

 “I just wish I would have known. He’s st-“ Keeva bit her tongue. He’s still a good person despite what he has done. She didn’t want to sound like she was pleading his case to Avi. She was sure he wouldn’t want that, and part of her felt that she had no right to. 

@oggyfromthebog

“Aaaand what did you say caused the damage?” Keeva was eyeing the dark Jeep skeptically, clipboard in hand. She was trying to give a repair estimate but the owner was incredibly talkative and she found herself distracted.

“Well it’s like I said. I was running an errand for a friend an’ course I had to cross downtown. Nasty part too.” Oggy lied, stretching what had been a bad run in with some mob thugs into something he thought might be a bit more acceptable. At least in the eyes of lanky mechanic looking over the vehicle. “There must have been a gang fight or somethin’, next thing I know I’m getting shot at. Thank god I heard about you from-ah what’s her name? Real angry broad?”

“Gwen?”

“That’s the one! Yeah, Gwen. She said you do real good body work, specially with this kinda thing. Good at uh- not keeping records of it too?”

Keeva looked at him for a beat before she sighed, setting the clipboard down. Curse my stupid bleeding heart. If Gwen had pointed him in Keeva’s direction she wouldn’t ask questions. Or at least wouldn’t question the integrity of the answers. She circled Jeep before sliding under it to make sure it was just body work that was needed.

“Go wait in the sitting area, I’ll be out with an estimate in a few minutes. Off the books.”

…

“Well obviously it’s strong enough, I smelled the same today,”  Avi pointed out.  “Fat lot of good it did me, for my ship, or Bhimyar, or even Cailean.  It’s just a smell…”  All Avitej could do was watch, as people and sea crafts were methodically destroyed by insurmountable power and force.

He nodded, but Keeva’s words only brought up a different thought.  “How did it go?  You obviously reached Illasqa, where Kirian intended to bring the Princess.  Gods above, is she alright now?  Or still doomed to a young and pointless death?”

He grunted.  “Everyone will eventually be fine, Keevs.  I have no doubt that you’re as resilient as anyone else.  But…”  But what?  If she wanted to feel bad, rail against her weakness, throw a tantrum, cry her eyes out?  Then it was all okay to not ‘be fine’ here, because if there was ever a suitable time to lose it, that time would be right now?  In the immediate aftermath of all that unhappy, tragic excitement?  

What did he want to give her allowance to do?  They were good enough acquaintances who got drunk and necked a bit, but they were not friends.  When Keeva was with her actual dear friends, perhaps then she truly could let herself go.  

So Avi let her go, looking out the windows once more. He felt the sea trying to slog in, and the mages toiling to keep it out as the wind pushed the sails. They just had to get to Kolrah, and the Makara 16th could rest.

When he turned around again, Keeva was frame was tense, curved delicately into an angerball. Her voice sharp and syllabic.

Avitej didn’t respond immediately.  The healing magic soothed his pain, allowing Avi clarity.  Instead he stood and watched Keeva’s bowed white-blonde head, and he was tempted.

Tempted to just name Nikolai Petrov to this enraged dragon who technically had no connection to Avi (not like Cailean did…oh Cai), and she could unleash her fury on the elf, as a sister avenging her brother.  It would be a tidy way to solve both their desires for revenge.

Except for the fact that Nikolai Petrov was an ancient elf who prided himself on his superior intelligence and possessed (functional, working) anti-dragon weapons that could take her down.  As well as having powerful telekinesis.  As well as cold killers who worked for him.  

And Keeva was…well.  Keeva.  Injured and inexperienced.  And even with her insurmountable dragon power, the only victory that Avi could envision, was one where both Petrov and Keeva died in the fight.  

Avi didn’t want Keeva to hurt herself.  It sounded brave in theory, but it was just foolhardy in reality and would help Cailean naught.  Avi didn’t want to be the one to tell Cai that his newly-found sister died or was hideously mutilated trying to avenge him.  It would kill Cailean.  Avi had seen enough tragic plays about his own ancestors to know how death beget death among good-hearted, loving people all eager to prove their capacity for love by avenging each other.

“I only have conjecture at the moment, Keevs.  Unfortunately as much as I’d love a good murderous rampage, I need to know for sure before I can voice any accusations.  I suppose when I do discover the truth, I’ll let you know first, hm?”

Avi put his hand over her clenched fist.  “For now, the main concern is finding Cailean,” Avi spoke gently.  “I don’t believe blood bonds are permanent; it will fade, and Cai might not remember any of it.  He’ll be lost and injured somewhere in Loqoala, maybe even reaching Eldur, I don’t know.  I injured his wing, he wasn’t flying properly when he left.   When we reach Kolrah, I’ll put out scouts and mages and dragons to seek him.”

~

Keeva was surprised that Avi knew what they had been doing to try to save Josefin. Or at least that they planned to come here looking for a way to do so. From the sounds of it, Kirian had told him, something that she found even more confusing. But his questions hit a freshly opened wound without knowing and she had to blink back against the water gathering in the corners of her eyes.

“Nothing we have tried has worked yet. There was an eclipse ritual that was supposed to fix everything but—“ Today was supposed to be so different. Josefin was supposed to be cured. Gods, she needed to make sure Josefin and Kirian were okay now that the eclipse was over. She had to remind herself that they were a quick step away for her, that she wouldn’t need to heal and fly back to them. “— I don’t know what went wrong.”

In the moment of quiet following her question, that hatred in her chest fought against her own nature. Like some crocodile throwing itself into a death roll. Desperately trying to damage something, rip off some piece of fury to fuel it. To keep itself alive. She was angry and she was hurt, and more than anything she wanted to take that out on the rebellion. On whoever had done this, any of it. 

But she couldn’t. As she sat there, muscles tense, the pain licking up her back from the strain, she knew she would end up in the same state or worse if she tried. If someone had gotten the upper hand on Cailean then they certainly would do the same to her. 

Avi’s words, murderous rampage, were enough to remind Keeva that wasn’t what she wanted. Remind her of that dark rage she was trying so hard to avoid. She wouldn’t let herself succumb to that again. The fury ebbed, but the hatred she long held for those that would hurt her kind solidified with new resolve. If she were to face those that had hurt her, hurt her kin- her friends, she would need to be sure she stood a chance against them. 

The dragoness looked up as Avi placed his hand on hers. She relaxed her fist, grabbing his hand, trying to find some measure of comfort in the contact. The anger had broken the veil of composure she had wrapped herself in and she felt all that pain bubbling it’s way to the surface. Tears spilled onto her cheeks, perhaps encouraged by the fact this wasn’t the first time she had shown such emotion in front of Avi. Even if the last time was liberated by dragon ale. She wiped her face with her sleeve as Avi finished detailing his plan but abandoned the effort as her tears continued to spill. He had the resources and people at his dispense to help the situation, where she had no clue how to. She felt the weight of that guilt, of not being able to help due to her inexperience and again she was overwhelmed by the feeling that she was too late. 

“Thank you, Avi. I—“ She hesitated, eyes darting to scars on his face. Another dragon who tried to kill me. Never found his match. Everything she had learned since their last meeting had begun to form a notion in her head. If she had just left the swamp sooner, wandered to the warm islands years ago… 

Her other hand lifted, as if to touch the scars she felt she could have prevented but she pulled back. She knew this wasn’t the time nor the place but with so much emotion crashing inside her and everything so uncertain, she needed to tell him. She spoke again through her tears, which came heavier now, weighed by her guilt and the loss she had felt that day before the festival. This time, she didn’t speak of her brother but of someone who Avi had once called his own. 

“I’m so sorry I couldn’t stop him Avi. That I was too late.”