astro

i wont elaborate too too much but ill put this under the cut anyway since i dont want to subject anyone to my opinions just out in the open

ch3 investigation is especially painful for me to watch because ninomiya's behavior is horribly reminiscent of my behavior toward my ex especially while the relationship was declining and it cringenukes me sooo bad. ninomiya is rsally relatable to me in the worst ways

i won't get into it, nobody asked and that would be far too tmi for tumblr, but i hope nobody makes any negative assumptions of me from this post lawl. i had my reasons for acting the way i did. oh god i hope nobody mistakes this as my real thoughts on matthias, he's honestly here as a placeholder. its kinda funny putting him in my ex's place, on a general level i was definitely much closer to matthias's position in that relationship

also i dunno i really wish the way ninomiya very clearly uses sex as a coping mechanism was confronted at some point but obviously im asking for too much. to me it kinda felt like ninomiya's advances on matthias during the ch3 investigation were framed as some sort of comedy relief instead of his head going haywire from the situation with ruka but i dont know i cant tell if im just being pessimistic because of von.i havw trouble assessing tone so i might just be crazy with that

im a really big fan of mattmiya on a conceptual level but i hate the way von went about them so so bad. it just felt like utter yaoislop and the only good scenes were hirose confronting ninomiya, the hair dying scene, and the one where matthias was begging nino to tell him he loved him. in my heart they are dysfunctional t4t yaorigem

mattmiya was such a good opportunity to explore both of their fucked up views on boundaries and relationships but instead the potential that was there ended up completely squandered in favor of von's yaoislop, and nino's situation was almost entirely brushed past while matthias's vulnerability was acknowledged exactly one(1) time. they are so fucking awful for each other, at least in a way that would only have been able to be mended outside of the limited time allotted by the killing game, and hirose was the only one smart enough to see that

+ full doodles if anyonw wants them i think theyre cute