Dorkable

This time I wanted to write a blog post as oppose to reblogging stuff. I needed an outlet to just blurt out anything and people don’t care about it.

I’m a writer by heart… a lazy one. And one thing I’m dealing with is laziness (you don’t say). As a writer mostly you need to be in the mood to write, be in the zone and all, but I am mostly not in the mood or even barely in the mood for anything. As if I have contained all my excitement and emotions saving them for the right moment to go completely bonkers, little did I know the problem I will be dealing with after is how to let them go. Like at night I get sll these emotions, drowning in them, I wanted to reach for my diary but I wouldn’t want to write them because I have a crappy handwriting. I wanted to reach for my iPad but it won’t make me sleep, so I have to save the thought for tomorrow morning. Soon as I wake up, get on blank page and bam! Nothing. I can’t write a single sentence. Not even “Alright, Diary… here it is… I’m gonna write it now… any second now…”

I wanted to document my life and my thoughts but I’m literally scared to even get my thoughts and perspective out there scared that I won’t get heard or even be seen by many. I’ve been on Tumblr years now and I tried getting noticed but I never really get the attention that I wanted. So I just stopped and rebloged things that seems appropriate that suit what mood I was in. One more fear, losing followers. Judge me.