❦Rose x James❦

They could enter the building again around three hours later when the firemen and inspectors considered that the place where Rose lived was safe. Sadly the neighbours living in the building next to hers, where the fire started, couldn't say the same.

A happy CPU ran to her beloved sofa and wasted no time to fall asleep. Rose couldn't blame her bulldog considering that probably the animal was stressed after the chaos, loud sounds and people yelling. She was too.

From her spot next to her pet, she saw James preparing the breakfast for them. The New Yorker sunrise entered through the window and hit exactly where he was standing. The fire started around 3am and now at 6am, both decided to eat something before going to sleep for a couple of hours, too, before deciding what to do that day. Before speaking as they promised they were going to speak. Although Rose couldn't help herself anymore.

James felt her arms, hugging him from behind and also felt her head resting on his back.

"Me too," she whispered.

"You too, what?"

"Yesterday when you were feverish, you said things. I don't know if you remember but you can guess the context. I—"

"I do remember. Of course I remember, I felt awful but I know what I said."

"Did you really mean it?"

James made a pause and then nodded. "Yes."

"You're still the sweetest man on earth, Jamie. I missed you. Tell me you're not going back yet," she said and James felt her hands clinging on his shirt.

"Not without you. I didn't travel to here to go home empty handed. I missed you too, Rose."

"Call me like you used to called me," she said and he chuckled.

"Do you think you deserve that?"

"No. But it'd be nice to hear it again. Since you came here you only called me Rose."

"That's your name."

"Bullshit. I know you so much, James. So much. I know you are so conflicted right now, half happy, half angry. It's okay. Let's enjoy that breakfast that smells so good first."

"I am but I didn't lie to you: I'm not going back without you and I love you."

"That's good," Rose said freeing him from her arms but not before planting a kiss on his back "because my days here are numbered."

"Are they?"

"Yes. Even if I have to live with my mum again or, God forbid, with Samuel for a while I'm going to be in London again as soon as I finish to arrange everything here and I can leave this damn city forever. With CPU, of course, she's part of my life now."

"You're talking like there's not another alternative like, you know, living with me. You and I."

"I didn't want to rush the things."

"It's up to you, love."

Rose cracked a smile. "You called me love."

"I did. Rose, I— ok, let's talk because I don't want to deal with this more time. I want to start again, I want to kiss you, I want do more than kiss you but I can't if I don't open my heart first. In a way, I'm happy that the fire alarm interrupted us last night because I don't want to do this like that. I did it before and I promised myself that I wasn't going to use sex to fix things ever again because it fixes nothing. I love you, I love you more than I loved anyone before… but you hurt me. You did it, unintentionally, I know, but it happened."

"James, I never wanted that. I was selfish, I ruined our happiness for nothing. I chose this over you and I know if this happened to you, you could never—"

"No, I could never. No because you were and you are, the most important thing in my life. I could never because I can't imagine my life without you. But I understand you and I'm guilty of what happened, too. You offered me to come with you and I said no. I regret that, I truly regret what I said. I'm sorry for that, I'm sorry for leaving you alone."

"I never blamed you, Jamie. I never, ever, did it. Not even a day. I know you had your work there, you like London I couldn't blame you for staying near your brothers because I know you need them. I'm sorry for everything, for me you started to smoke again."

"I need you more than I need anything in this world, including my brothers. And me smoking, Rose, that's my choice it's not your fault."

Rose drank her coffee to help with the knot in her throat. Her eyes, however, were impossible to disguise and tears were clouding her sight. The idea that James began to smoke again just months after she left him was probably the heaviest weight on her back "I can't forgive myself, I don't care if I had an awful time here I deserve it, what I can't live with is the idea that I made you unhappy. The moment I knew you, all I wanted was giving you the best moments but I failed you."

"All couples had to go through to some storm, love, and this is ours. You didn't fail me, Jared made me understand that we all make mistakes. You didn't fail me."

"You were angry at me."

"Yes, I was. So much that you couldn't understand but I never stopped loving you, I couldn't be here if that was the case."

"Angry like you used to be with Anya?"

"No. You and Anya aren't the same. When I was angry at her I just ignored it, I just wanted to move on and finish with that and there was a moment I knew it was completely over. I never felt that with you, because it's not over. Let's have our second chance because I don't want more mistakes between us. If I don't do it, then I'm not going to be able to live with myself. I know you are sorry, I can see it and I'm sorry too."

"I love you more than anything. I promise I'm not going to disappoint you ever again."

"You never disappointed me."

"Are you sure?" She asked and he nodded. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"When did you sleep with another woman? I know it happened, but I'd like to know when. It's just something I need to know."

"I— How…?"

"Jamie, you can't lie to me! I told you, I know you so much! The other night when we were in the rooftop I told you that you were my last kiss, my last everything and for a second your face changed and I knew it, you met someone."

James stirred his coffee and avoided looking at her but when he did it, Rose could confirm her fears before he could speak.

"It happened once. It was the night before you called me. Less than a week before. Rose, I was at my lowest point, I thought that sex could help me to cheer me up but it didn't. I didn't even enjoy it and I was rude to the woman afterwards so I'm pretty sure she could kick me in the face if she could and probably I deserve it. I don't remember her name, I don't know what I was thinking either I just wanted to feel something. I went to the pub were we went together the first time, I thought someone like you could be there but there was anyone and I was about to leave when she invited something to drink and I said why not… and it happened but it wasn't even close to what I feel with you. I called for an Uber for her afterwards, she didn't stay. And about 24 hours later I heard your voice after a year… and here I am six days later."

"You went to our pub?"

"I was looking for you."

"I was late," she replied and both smiled for the first time since the conversation began. "Thanks for being honest with me."

"Thank you for letting me talk and just to be clear, I'm happy you decided to go back to London but under any circumstances I'm going to pressure you to live with me, but if you want to, you know, you can."

"My return will take time. I need to talk to the estate agent responsible for this place, I need to resign, I need to find an airline that allows pets, see what I do with my things… we have time. We're living together now and so far we're fine, don't we?"

"I think we're doing great."

"I'm tired, Jamie. I'm really tired, would you like to rest, too?"

"There's nothing in the world that I'd like to do more than be in bed with you, but I'd like to make something first. I'll be back before you know it."

"Are you leaving?"

James leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "Just a couple of hours, I'm planning something for us. Just rest, alright?"

"I can't rest now. What are you up to?"

"Surprise, love."

Despite her words, Rose fell asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow. The stress of the day before when he was sick, the fire alarm after that, those hours in the streets while the firemen tried to control the fire in the building next to hers and then, the inevitable conversation with James ended with her energy. Yet, it was the first time in a year that she felt light as a feather, all the anguish and pain in her soul seemed like they were gone.

James didn't come back until three hours later. The silence in Rose's apartment reminded him the happy days when they lived together and after coming from work. Sometimes he found her sleeping on her pile of papers she used to design clothes, most of the times wearing one of his shirts or sweaters and in those moments James used to think he was the luckiest man on Earth.

It was that familiar silence that made him smile in that moment. It was different from the one his own flat had the last year, that silence was suffocating, heavy, it felt like he was drowning in it. It was a silence full of pain and he couldn't escape from it.

James went to her bedroom and stared at her a moment before walking to her. Talking to her showed him how wrong he was about her and how his own mind made him believe things weren't true. Rose and her eyes full of pain, her endless "I'm sorry" were the proof of it. And tired of awful feelings, he decided to surprise her in a way that, maybe, could help to push them together for once and forever. James took off his shoes and laid next to her bringing her close to his chest.

.

"What are you doing?" she asked they woke up right after midday.

They were walking down the hall, but his hand was covering her eyes so she couldn't see what was happening.

"Don't be impatient, love. We're almost here."

The summer breeze hit her face when both reached the streets and it was when James let her see. Rose let out an audible gasp when saw him standing next to a black bike very similar to the one he had when she met him.

"Holy shit, Jamie! Did you rent it?"

"I did. For the old times, do you remember how we used to ride every time you came to see me and during the weekends?"

"Of course I remember! I always enjoyed those moments with you. When you went to pick me up after classes… we used to be that young."

"We still are, what do you mean we used to be? Love, I thought that while I'm here we could ride one again. Like the old times. Transit here is awful."

"It is. Oh, wow, Jamie! Yes! I love it! This is what you were planning?"

"It is. Now come on, you wanted me to know the city and now I'm willing to do it," he said giving her one of the helmets and adjusting his. "To where, sweetheart?"

"Did you bring your camera?"

"Your question offends me. Of course! What kind of photographer do you think I am?"

"Then, Jamie, a long day awaits us."

James started the motorbike and felt her arms around him. He smiled and realised that hadn't be that happy in a long time. "Are you fine?" He asked her.

"I couldn't be better."

The moment they started to travel around the city was when they felt like their old selves again. The jokes that were back, the laughs and the new good memories they started to build together again. The photos he took of her again and also together near the most famous buildings and places in New York. For Rose was seeing that city under a new light, until that moment it was a place she felt trapped in, now was enjoying it in ways she didn't do before.

Central Park found them resting during the sunset after a long afternoon in the beautiful chaos New York was. Sharing an ice-cream and sitting under a tree was a good way to finish that day.

"I had several missed calls from my boss," Rose said checking her phone. "This bitch still thinks I'm going to keep working for her. Tomorrow morning I'm going to talk to HR to announce my resignation."

"It's official, then."

"Very much. I'm going to be independent when we're back in London, I'm going to make and sell dresses for my own clients and I'll try to save enough money to open my own store. I already saved a good amount of money this year. It's not impossible. If we adjust…"

"We?"

"I mean, if we're going to live together… of course not if you don't want to."

"Are you kidding me? That's the only thing I want. And yes! I support you, you deserve your own store. We're going to be fine, Róisín, you'll see. I'm sure that in any case, our family and friends could help us and — what?" James asked when he saw her looking at him with a big smile in her face.

"You called me Róisín."

"No, I didn't!"

"You fucking did, James! You said it. You did it without thinking, didn't you? I can pretend I didn't listen to it, if you want but you said it."

James lightened up a cigarette and shook his head: "It's fair. You called me ketzele the other night, but you were drunk and I pretended I imagined it but it was very real. It made me realise how much I missed hearing that."

"Did I? I don't remember saying it. I was dying to call you that way again but I didn't know when to do it."

"We need to meet each other again, I think," James stated, letting out a puff of smoke staring at the distance where the sun started to hide behind the buildings "this is such a beautiful city."

"It is. You should see it in December. Christmas here is another story. The lights, the snow, people look happier… my family came to celebrate Hanukkah here last December and even my bubbe had to admit that it looked like a paradise. Movies don't make justice. Maybe one year we can come in December, you deserve to see it, ketzele" Rose said, resting her head on his shoulder and looking at the same direction he was at first, but then closing her eyes. She didn't noticed when he tossed his cigarette but felt his hand on her cheek and hair. When opened her eyes briefly, he was closer to her to the point Rose could feel his breath on her skin.

"Did I tell you how much I love you, Róisín?" he whispered over her mouth.

"How much?"

"A lot."

Their second first kiss happened during the golden hour in Central Park with the last rays of sunshine hitting on them. It happened exactly 391 days after the last one.

Their second first kiss happened after he promised himself that could never was going to look back, after she believed seeing him again wasn't going to be possible. James' hands moved to her waist and back and in a single motion, sat her on his legs where he could have her even closer to him. Her fingers were lost in his hair, caressing tenderly the back of his neck.

"I love you, Rosie."

"I love you too and I'm sorry again, ketzele."

"Shhh," he replied stroking one of her cheeks with his fingertips "whatever happened, it's over. Do you want to start again? I'm asking officially this time. This time for real."

"Yes, yes I want."

"We're together again, then," he said and both kissed again. Slowly, until they decided that the best thing they could do was going back to her apartment and have the reconciliation they deserved in her bed.

Used to see any kind of things, citizens around barely paid attention to that young couple under the tree, for them they were just another couple like thousands others.

But for James and Rose they were the only people on Earth.

Maybe because was true, no one else but them. At least no one was alive the way they were.

.

EPILOGUE.

A month and a half later in the apartment were just a couple of boxes containing the remaining things Rose knew was going to need back in London. The rest was property of the estate agency and the things she couldn't send to Europe were given to charity. Finally she was ready to go back home with him.

CPU was already in London under the care of Samuel until they were there. Rose had found an airline just for pets but there wasn't any place able the day they had their tickets so CPU arrived at London three days ago and according to Sam she was doing great.

James hummed when felt her hand on his abdomen. It was near 5am and they needed to be at the airport in three hours. The estate agent was going to be there at 6 so they could give her the key of that apartment.

"We need to get up, James."

"Five minutes."

"We don't have five minutes."

"Yes, we do," he said taking her in his arms, hiding his face on her shoulder. "We have ten, if we're quick enough. One last time here, Róisín."

"Are you really think about having sex now?"

"Not just now," he admitted and both laughed. "What do you say?"

Her response was rolling in bed to face him. "Ten minutes."

"It's a deal," James said, kissing her.

It was 6:15 when they left the apartment. She had signed the last paper and both were in the taxi to the airport. Finally New York was part of their past, finally their new life was about to start.

Rose looked through the window and even when she was ready, she couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions about it. Over a year had passed. She arrived at that city with sadness in her heart and never thought it was going to be possible to leave it with a smile and with him. Rose interlocked her fingers with his and didn't let him go until they arrived at the JFK.

Despite it was full of people, they could check their luggage and boxes in almost no time but not everything went according to the plan.

"I can't find my passport," James said checking his backpack for thousand times. "I can't find my fucking passport."

It wasn't in Rose's bags or they pockets either.

They went to the main counter thinking someone had found it and leave it there, but it wasn't. Yet the woman there spoke to her supervisor and they were going to help to find it. For a moment it seemed New York didn't want to let them go and it only increase their anxiety. They only had an hour before the flight.

"This has to be a bad joke," he said after calling the taxi services asking for the one they took because maybe it had been left there, but even when they replied and the man checked his vehicle the passport wasn't there.

They just wanted to leave. Just that and now it seemed it wasn't going to be possible. While Rose was trying to find a solution calling the embassy, James went back to the main counter just in time to see a mother and her little boy there.

"He found it," she was saying and James felt his heart jump "it was in the bathroom. I didn't know he had it until I saw something in his jacket."

"You saved my life! You don't know it!" James said, taking his passport and holding it in his hands like his life depended on it. "My girlfriend and I were planning to go back home after a long time and I couldn't believe I couldn't find this thing!"

"It was him," the woman replied and smiled at her son. "We're glad we could help."

"Thanks," James said to the boy and crouched down to see him in eyes. "You don't know what this means to me. What's your name?" He asked and the boy replied. "I'll remember your name. Thanks."

Already in the plane, more relaxed and ready to go, James could finally say that little detail to Rose because until that moment all they could do was run through the airport to reach the gate before it was too late.

"I'll be forever grateful to that little boy," James said "without his help we couldn't be here now."

"Did he tell you his name?"