no chemistry

queue this post when it’s your birthday and be surprised

for about a year, i worked at a call center for sprint. i have a similar kind of story. a woman called, and said she had a question about the call history on her bill. “sure, let me just pull up your account-” and she cut me off going, “no, no, it’s not anything specific, it’s just. so, if you change the time on your phone, does that change the time on the bill?” “uh… no? the time on the phone doesn’t matter, the call history is recorded by the towers.” “ohhhh” she said in the saltiest voice i have ever heard “so even if you changed the timezone it wouldn’t change the time on the bill? to, say, the middle of the night?” i stg yall i looked into the camera like i was on the office. “um… no? it would still be the local time of the tower. is there anything else i can help you with?” to me, overly chipper: “nope! thank you! have a great day!” turning on someone as she hung up: “she says yoU’RE A LYING SACK OF-” i still mean-snicker every time i think about it.

Adding: All the LGBTQ people who can’t bring their partner to family gatherings and/or get flack for it.

and the ones who have to pretend their partner is just their friend when bringing them over

To the ones who can’t go home

i’m sorry what the FUCK is going on in the first two

seeing this on october, 20 was hilarious seeing this on november, 11 is not.

I swear to god, if *one* more olivia bot comments some random word on one of my posts im going to flip my entire shit, tumblr

will

bitch imma fuckin kill u

you

Fuckin try me i dare ya

marry

....... Go on

me

Holy shit yes guys she fuckin proposed

Enemies to lovers, 25k slowburn