𝑬𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒏

i can’t be who they want me to

and i can’t let go of the person i want to be

i’m dreaming of a home, with a calming view

of a life where i’m not scared to be me

putting a show for everyone

to see i’m sacred

to see i’m pure and undone

hallucinations and nightmares

of not becoming able

when all i wanted is

for my dreams to not be a fable

to eat an orange cake

and drink my tea in serenity

to forget all the heartache

and to embrace my truth for eternity

yearning for the life i deserve

for them to stop throwing stones

years will pass by as i observe

She reaches with hands

you once taught how to hold,

but yours stay so distant,

so vacant, so cold.

She gathers the love

that you left on the floor,

pieces of childhood

she wanted for more.

Yet no matter how much

she tries to stay near,

you love from a distance

too far to hear.

a daughter who waits,

though you still forget her.

she’ll be the best you ever had

somewhere where i feel steady

a place where love is strong

to be held with divine

with no need to roam

a place i call mine

for where the river must go

and when the birds shall be free

the leaves may fall

the seasons change

what’s out of reach

will rearrange

no matter how much your heart

may catch fire

if it’s meant to be

it won’t need justifier.

so let the waves go higher

let your mind see

therefore you won’t desire