locked the fuck in get my money up
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if i look back, i am lost


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@just-your-average-tangerine
locked the fuck in get my money up

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just saw this clip of stacy talking abt the scene of naim's frst encounter with the entity at hunter's funeral and explaining how the entity targets naim by mimicking ryan's lust bc it's whole design is to link desire with fear. though naim is crying and shaken it doesn't offer words of comfort, it pulls him in for a rough kiss and tries to arouse him--targeting naim's sexual desire specifically. only once naim responds, kissing back with fervour, does it become violent. because the entity's main goal is to link fear and desire in naim's mind. pavlovian conditioning: by associating arousal with violence and fear, any feelings of lust and desire will be avoided. that's why the church enacts the ritual. they don't want queer kids dead, they want them scared. the goal has always been conformity. we need fear. fear is how we survive.
but when naim's last act in the face of what could be his death is to reach up and gently cup the entity's face, it falters. because to the people who set this thing upon ryan and naim and hunter, love was never part of the equation. the church puts so much emphasis on lust and desire because that's all queerness is to these people--sexual immorality condemned by God. and that's why the entity, a tool used by religious folk to scare kids away from their queerness and force them to conform, ultimately fails to drive ryan and naim apart.
in honor of leviticus being out on digital here's my tribute to ryanaim <333
So at work I'm working in the dairy now instead of grocery like I'd been doing for the last 7 years, which is fine I guess. But theres only 2 other people in dairy, one I'm told is a good worker but I haven't met him yet. And the other just intentionally does everything wrong. I spent half my first day fixing a bunch of shit and when he came in (2 hours late) he immediately started telling me "you don't have to do all that it doesn't matter" (about things that I was told I absolutely do have to do) and half the shit that I had to fix involved things like him leaving expired products on the shelf.
I can't even ask if I have questions because I know damn well this guy's not going to give me an accurate answer.
Also, I am part time but they've still got me working 8 hour shifts, just 4 days a week instead of 5. Which is going to kill in a couple weeks when I start school and work one night, have class all day, then work again the next night. And I was not given any say in my days off, which I always have gotten to choose before.
Tonight, he came in 2 and half hours late, pulled out the smallest pallet, told me that my next task is to do the largest pallet, then went on break. Not even 10 minutes after clocking in, he went on break.
a thing about me is i basically never notice a wig or other kind of hairpiece in tv/movies. it has to be party city territory for me to even twig it. people will complain about characters' wigs looking bad and i will nod along but there is like a 90% chance i did not notice for a second while watching. i consider this mostly a blessing.

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So at work I'm working in the dairy now instead of grocery like I'd been doing for the last 7 years, which is fine I guess. But theres only 2 other people in dairy, one I'm told is a good worker but I haven't met him yet. And the other just intentionally does everything wrong. I spent half my first day fixing a bunch of shit and when he came in (2 hours late) he immediately started telling me "you don't have to do all that it doesn't matter" (about things that I was told I absolutely do have to do) and half the shit that I had to fix involved things like him leaving expired products on the shelf.
I can't even ask if I have questions because I know damn well this guy's not going to give me an accurate answer.
Also, I am part time but they've still got me working 8 hour shifts, just 4 days a week instead of 5. Which is going to kill in a couple weeks when I start school and work one night, have class all day, then work again the next night. And I was not given any say in my days off, which I always have gotten to choose before.
What is this feeling + texposts
Wicked (2024)
Wicked: For Good (2025) — dir. Jon M. Chu
nobody talks about how exhausting it is to live in that space between "things will get better" and "i can't handle this anymore." it's like your emotions are constantly swinging. leaving you both hopeful and defeated in the same day.
30 FEMALE CHARACTERS FOR 30K (as voted by my followers) "I'm through accepting limits, 'cause someone says they're so." 21. Elphaba Thropp â–¸ Wicked

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Okay but also all the people saying the Odyssey is Elliot Page's "first good role" are all fucking clown shoes okay? He is an Oscar nominated actor. Yall are fucking stupid.
one thing about Neal is he beats the "protagonist being the only person who talks" allegations by having a good reason to constantly be talking which is he sticks his hand up in meetings and literally wiggles with impatience until called on . everybody else would love to say something but unfortunately Peter has to first get the opinion of his special fucking guy or his guy will start ripping the erasers off of pencils and eating them
i bet it feels good to be an underwater plant just swaying in sync with the flow of water
Are you alive
Don’t ask me no personal shit like this
Jonathan Bailey as Tim Laughlin in “Beyond Measure" (Fellow Travelers - 1x06)
Gifs 291/?

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At this point I've seen like three unconnected pieces of American media set in a superficially idyllic small town with a big fuckoff lake that functions as a liminal boundary between the Known and the Unknown and in which a major character attempts suicide by drowning, and now I'm wondering if the Liminal Death Lake is just a thing American small towns have.