A

Frodo Baggins: never involved in a relationship, loves his friends — fandom: he’s so in love with Sam, he even lets him and his family live with him

Bilbo Baggins: never married, dedicates his life to writing, adopts Frodo and loves him like a son — fandom: I ship him with Thorin so much

Sherlock Holmes: dedicated his life to his work, very loyal to his friends, never married or had a real relationship — fandom: he’s in love with Irene! He’s in love with John!

Aziraphale & Crowley: canonically ace according to the book, poster characters for a qpr — fandom: why don’t they just f**k? Why don’t they just k**s? This is queerbaiting!

Aces who were pressured to have sex when they were in a relationship even though they didn’t want to do it

Aces who are afraid to get into a relationship because they fear they’d feel pressured to have sex

Aroaces who are scared of being alone their entire life

Aces who read posts saying that them not having sex with their partner is abusive

Aros being surrounded by couples

Aroaces feeling pressured to find great friends and/or passions in life not to feel left out

They changed her from practically aroace person into a hyper sexual one. At the beginning she was barely interested in dating and her rule was no sex. Even when Sheldon was wondering if the real act would be as enjoyable as pretending to be in a sexual relationship Amy said she was not yet in that place. She first feels sexual attraction upon meeting Zack but decides not to act on it. And then suddenly she’s super into sex without any reason really.

I don’t understand why they had to do the makeover in the last episodes. I loved original Amy. The cardigan wearing Amy. The orthopedic shoes Amy. The grandma style Amy. Of course she looked more attractive after Raj helped her. But it was a bit inconsistent with her character. She had her comfort zone and dressed accordingly (for dates, interviews etc.). I don’t like that it wasn’t enough for her to win a Nobel prize and have a happy life – she had to become attractive on top of it.

they respect each other’s boundaries

they move at a pace that’s comfortable for both of them

they discuss and compromise on physical activities

they were friends at first and then they decided to change the character of the relationship without changing its characteristics – they called each other girlfriend and boyfriend which was the main change, they also decided to go on dates (during which they were doing the same things as before)

they developed love for each other over time

even when doing something others would describe as romantic they didn’t characterize it as romantic

they didn’t act romantic (even Leonard described their hand holding as not romantic)

good food

entertaining book

well-made Netflix show

going to bed at 10 pm

music that gives you goosebumps

music you can loudly singalong to while driving

movies you can watch 10 times and they are still great

learning languages

looking at art

wearing comfy clothes

feeling warm, cozy and hyggelig

People would often call me cynical when I said that what we call being in love is actually a bunch of hormones in our organisms. I would also add a fun fact that when you eat a lot of chocolate similar hormones are actually released. But I never denied the existence of love as a feeling. I just always classified it as something organic and said that when it fades (I mean being in love) you can experience deeper feelings like attachment, respect, comfort and trust. To which people would often remark that there’s no deeper feeling than love.

I feel like we have a great problem with defining love actually. There are different types of love but sometimes it seems like we fail to differentiate them.

I’ve been avoiding calling myself aromantic because I’ve read many times that one of the signature signs of being aromantic is not having crushes.

And I had been having crushes on people ever since primary school.

But today I actually discovered that every time I had something I called a crush it was not a crush in the… conventional sense.

Every person I was crushing on was completly unavailable for me. I think I subconsciuously chose people I would not have a chance with and there was no way we’d ever be „together“ in any sense. 

It was easy for me to have a crush because I didn’t have to do anything to make it into something more.

My crush was never once romantic nor sexual, I never wanted to do any of those things with people I called my crushes. 

I was just calling them that because I thought that term fit (even though it didn’t).

Because of that I felt like I can’t call myslef an aromantic.

Aziraphale & Crowley

Sherlock & John

how I’ve always wanted a relationship and then didn’t know what to do in one

why the relationships never worked out for me

why I find romance books boring after reading two or free in a row

how I always felt that I would prefer to be in a relationship in ‘advanced’ stage where everything is comfortable and steady instead of the romantic beginning

how I never understood what people meant when they said they want Aziraphale and Crowley to be something more than they were in the show

how I never understood why finding a partner is the ultimate life goal

how I never understood why people said that some things and activities were better enjoyed with a loved one

why my dream date is eating together or doing some parallel activity like reading simultaneously

why Bilbo and Frodo Baggins being single and not interested in dating was always so appealing

why what I assumed was a fictional crush was actually me liking a character because they liked literature and art

how I never understood the phrase ‘love at first sight’ and how it made me icky because of the assumption that you could fall in love because somebody is pretty

how I always said that it would be okay for me to live in separate bedrooms with my partner

Let me paint you a picture (pun intended) – when I see a painting I can say that it’s pretty or aesthetically pleasing. It’s nice to look at it at the museum. It may even be nice to have it on the wall provided it goes well with my decor and furniture. Do I want to touch the painting? No, thank you. Do I want to lick it? Date it? Do nasty things to it? Nope.

Charlie Weasley (HP) – first character ever I heard being addressed as on the aspec, loves dragons (so do I), made me realize I’m ace (before I discovered I’m also aro)

Bilbo Baggins (The Hobbit) – he was just chilling in the Shire, eating cool meals, having adventures and making friends – first character that made me feel so at peace before I even knew I was aro

Po (Kung Fu Panda) – dude just wanted to practice Kung fu, to have cool friends and eat noodles and honestly SAME

Remy (Ratatouille) – I always loved that movie because it was so important to me that you could be whoever you want to be despite what the word is telling you – Remy is like the representation of that in my life, plus he cooks amazingly

Jim Hawkins (Treasure Planet) – there is not one romantic thought in that boy’s brain, he just wants to fly ships

Aziraphale and Crowley (Good Omens) – living in a perfect representation of what for me is ideal queerplatonic relationship (I also never understood why people wanted more out of their relationship and then I discovered I’m aroace)

I'm majoring in forensic psychology

I'm studying literature (as my second degree)

I'm a huge bookworm

I'm a fanfiction writer and an aspiring book writer

I'm interested in cognitive psychology, neuroscience and art

I'm a book editor, a tutor, a hand therapist, a mindfulness coach and an effective learning techniques coach

I speak Polish, English, Spanish and I'm learning Swedish

I'm aroace

I'm a plant mom