"Today is what I have."

I still listen for you. Almost every evening.  Just like I used to.

It was always nice  to end the day with you.

The coffee helps me.  It’s as close as I can get  to you now.

But summer has gone  and you have gone too.

And so has the iced coffee  with half and half. 

Now it’s just  half good memories  and half lonely;

Because,  I can still hear your smile  hiding behind the words  you were choking back;

who is to say who wins or who loses.

there are a lot of exceptions to many situations.

and when you breathe are you really gaining anything more than air?

does life stand still when you are wounded? 

when you ache so deeply and yet you fight it for everyone else. youre own pain means nothing. because everyone you care so much for; they deserve more from you. and you deserve more from yourself.

weakness. a state of mind that only few can escape. 

and I’m a victim. but I am the predator.

I am broken, and I am the hammer.

I feel sick, but I am the cure.

and i forget what its like to feel something other than hurt. or scared. or achey.  so in those seconds that I feel like I have been released from these chains, its like im standing there holding the hand of a sunbeam, and its like I had never knew sadness or pain. 

sometimes i jsut dont know if anyone is listening.

Its hard to want to be around the ones that make you feel the most, especially if its negative. 

you can hate me. I’d be okay with that. maybe I’d learn to let go. Maybe I would grow up. maybe I would move on. but dont say I didn’t warn you.

damaged is damaged, no matter the amount of glue or tape.

Your flaws are perfect for the heart that is meant to love you.