Okay so this is entirely prompted by that previous ask which led to me doing a lot of thinking, so I’m gonna repeat myself a little bit, but like.
I have been a stalwart hater of the Willow Xander cheating plotline forever. But like, now that I have actually fully and properly sat down to think on it, like,,, idk, I’m kind of switched? I kind of get it? Like, I think it might actually be totally in character for the two of them?
Because so, Willow: she is known to be incredibly possessive of her people. When Xander and Cordy start dating, she gets upset and doesn’t like it, and wonders what he sees in her. When Buffy and Faith get really close in s3, she gets jealous and mad because she has to share Buffy with Faith. When Faith and Xander hook up, she cries and I don’t think its because she like genuinely has romantic feelings for him still, I think it’s because he’s just another thing that Faith has now taken away from her. When Buffy gets really close to Riley (and the Initiative) in s4, she again gets jealous and upset about it, she tries to pull Buffy away and when it doesn’t work, she distances herself from Buffy and closer to Tara. When Xander starts dating Anya she really doesn’t like Anya for a very long time. None of this is like, cheating, but it shows that she is incredibly possessive of the people she loves.
Xander, meanwhile, is shown to essentially always stray somewhat in his affections. His crush on Buffy remains for a long while, even through his relationship with Cordy. Early on he says that the only other person he’s interested in (Buffy) isn’t available. When him and Cordy break up in BBaB, he’s pissed off and sad about it, UNTIL Buffy shows interest in him and he immediately is cool with that. (Like, he has the right to, he’s single, but it says something that the moment Buffy shows interest, he completely forgets his heartbreak). He frequently comments on his interest in others (such as Faith), while with Cordy. Early on in his relationship with Anya, before they’re properly official but once they’re already sleeping together for a bit, he says he wants to meet people at the Bronze, and when in the sex house episode they break up for like an hour, he immediately goes to spin the bottle with another girl. None of these are also like, absolutely Infidelity, but it shows that he does often have interest in other people while in a relationship.
So like,,,, yeah idk. It feels odd because like, in my gut, I’m still such a hater of that storyline, but logically the more I think about it, the more it really actually makes sense for both of them, the more I realize it is an accurate representation of their character traits and flaws. Wierd.
