do it before god and all the fish

always such a struggle when you get to the sex scene part of the fic you're writing and you're not horny at all. i don't know. their things were touching. without ANY underwear. the end.

lestat said kill yourself and armand made one of his bandmates jump in front of a train. lestat made fun of armand's sexual performance and past as a child sex slave and armand helped his boyfriend leak a video of lestat having sex with his own mother. you go low he goes to hell hall of fame

Polycules should be able to trade people like sports teams do

Listen -- you're a good defender and your pussy is fantastic, but that's not what our team needs right now. We're trading you to Greater Boston in exchange for someone who has a car.

the second radish is 29 feet away

this is legitimately the funniest post on this site

it's literally the evilest thing in the world to finally have time to write but then be tired. like wow you're telling me these two hours before going to bed are completely free but my brain is just Not Feeling It? fuck off

Really starting to realize that all my favorite f/f ships involve two very driven and ambitious women whose passion & ruthlessness has isolated them as individuals in differing yet simultaneously deeply compatible kinda ways. I just think there is something so so delicious about grappling with the way others see you and expect you to be soft and sometimes outright dismiss you when you aren’t prioritizing compassion or friendship or family or whatever, just The Objective. and then meeting someone who understands that completely. woman who would stab anyone in pursuit of her goals meets woman who effortlessly parries the blow, gives her a tip on how to kill her better next time, and then they go get drinks