The Soapbox

Happy New Year to you all. --- I'll be posting the full poem on the poetry page on Facebook, but I've been doing some thinking and I believe it may be time for me to let this go. --- While I've been writing since I was a kid, and it was certainly a fierce passion of mine, it became my identity: Jacqueline the author, poet, writer. However I just don't identify with any of those things anymore. --- As I've gotten older I've discovered other things I'm interested in, other things I've become passionate about. I'm just not as passionate about this as I used to be. --- Truth is I used to write almost every day. I now barely write at all. I no longer have a strong desire to do so anymore. --- It's a huge, and very difficult, decision to make but as of now it's the only one that makes sense at the moment. --- Without writing I felt I was nothing. That I had nothing else to offer, and in some ways, even with this gift it still wasn't much TO offer. --- So I need this time to really think beyond writing and truly see my full potential... which is also hard because I really thought this was as far as my abilities went. --- I won't be taking the page down any time soon, nor will I delete this poetry gram because at the end of the day: this is still MY work. It is something I created, even if I have fallen out of love with it. That means something to me. --- Thank you all for your love, prayers and support. I hope that the things I've written have truly spoken to you over the years and I hope that they will continue to do so. --- Take care and God bless. https://www.instagram.com/p/B7Ghu51ATl7/?igshid=1p7owdw3cnuc5

Sometimes you learn the best lessons by not saying a word. #Poetry #Poem #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #JacquelineSimone https://www.instagram.com/p/B6Qz2dvgaOF/?igshid=1rq9fjika0m9s

Woke up at the crack of dawn feeling inspired. It's strange because this isn't the first time I've had a dream inspired poem. --- There are times I have dreams that make me think, "That would make for a really great story" or "I could definitely see that becoming a movie someday." However, writing it all up as a short story would take me too long and I'd most likely forget. With poems, it somehow preserves the imagery while freely allowing me to pin down my jumbled thoughts before I completely forget what I dreamed about. --- It was interesting because I thought it was just another strange dream until I got to the end of this poem and realized it truly is about the struggles of life. The pains we go through, the adversity we face, not exactly ideal situations... and all the things we still have to deal with on top of that... --- But if we can hang on for just one more day, if we can tell ourselves to keep going in spite of... then victory is always sure to follow. --- Don't go back. Keep moving forward. Choose to see the good that is happening within yourself and in your life despite the evil and death that may seemingly surround you every day. We don't know when our stories will end, how they will end. Only that someday they will. We do, however, get to choose how we see all of it. --- I choose to see hope even when the world titles my story hopeless because they didn't write my story. God did, and that of itself, is reason enough for me to have hope. #Snippet #Poem #Poetry #JacquelineSimone #JacquelineSimoneSadberry https://www.instagram.com/p/B5xZq8SAmef/?igshid=evj9ki9klqrc

#Snippet to be honest, I was hesitant to post this... but after ANOTHER offensive statement in the K-Pop community... I decided to do it anyway. --- Colorism doesn't just only affect Black people. It is NOT just a Black people issue or something only we deal with. I have seen videos of people in Korea, regular every day people, who have been called darkie, or admitted to calling someone darkie, or defend colorism because "it's been this way for centuries." And it's not just happening there, but EVERYWHERE for ALL people of color. --- So why write this poem? Because I'm tired of people who "love" their favorite groups or artists, but never hold them accountable. Usually because they are so obsessed with or biased towards them that they blatantly ignore it or make excuses. Oh yeah... or they absolutely agree with them and see nothing wrong with it. "What are they so upset about?! Just shut up already!" --- In every community there are problems (church, language, music, film/acting, etc.) There are problems because where people are, problems are sure to be there. So it doesn't matter what community it is; if people exist within it, then you can expect issues to exist as well. --- The question is how do we handle the issue? How do we handle each other? I could close my eyes and stop up my ears because that's a ___ problem and as a 30-something African American woman that has nothing to do with me. Or... I can take the time to listen, even if I don't understand or agree, because that is the decent thing to do. I could come to the table with an open mind to at least TRY to see where the other person is coming from even if we end up agreeing to disagree. Because that's the RIGHT thing to do. --- I can only hope more of us would give each other this same courtesy. Until then, I will keep writing the things that don't always get snaps or applause, that make people uncomfortable (depression, suicide, discrimination, faith, self-hate, etc.,) because I know it's the one thing I CAN do. --- I mean I could just say, "You're stupid" but that's just childish and what would that solve? #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem #NaNoWriMo https://www.instagram.com/p/B5eGDIMg_5C/?igshid=gqg38o1tpoe7

#Snippet 2 of 2 --- I have spent a lot of time being angry, "If I'm so talented, why I can't I get a job?" "I'd have a job if I were selling copies of my book every day." "If had more sales I wouldn't be in debt." "My life is a mess...I may as well just give up. This is the best I'll ever be able to do." --- I spend so much time being angry, depressed, discouraged, bitter, unhappy... but very little time doing anything to change it. God can literally snap His fingers--or rather, SPEAK THE WORDS and my situation would change in an instant. But I wouldn't learn anything and I wouldn't grow at all... --- Sometimes, whether you like it or not, you are going to have some of the worst and ugliest seasons of your life. You will feel angry, and maybe even disgusted, with the circumstances you are faced with. Pretending like you're okay with everything while false-hoping God is going to turn it around is not how you handle it. Embrace that anger. It's okay to be angry, to tell Him it's not fair. --- Because honestly, it's when you confront the anger and the pain you feel that Jesus begins to work. It's hard to treat someone who refuses to acknowledge they're in pain. And once you acknowledge your feelings, then is when hope comes alive. In the midst of the very real emotions you feel, you aren't blinded by the lies anymore. You can see things for what they are, and in that place is where hope lives. --- I FEEL like the odds are against me. I FEEL like nothing is in my favor right now, so why do anything? I FEEL like I am never going to win, but I cannot deny the evidence in my life that shows otherwise. I cannot deny the fact that it could be so much worse, should be worse, yet here I am. Struggling, but still here and far better off than where I used to be. I can't help BUT have hope. --- Walk in victory today. Know that YOU ARE a winner, no matter what. #JacquelineSimone #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem #NaNoWriMo https://www.instagram.com/p/B42zi8vg45C/?igshid=6umbobl4mutn

#Snippet 1 of 2 --- You are hurting yourself, and allowing others to suffer without hope, when you choose to do nothing. Every time you sit on your gift, you miss a chance to truly change someone's life. --- Don't miss that chance again. #JacquelineSimone #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem #NaNoWriMo https://www.instagram.com/p/B42xcWxgfI1/?igshid=15m9552es62dp

In summary: I'm exhausted. I've been feeling super tired all day... I'm going to sleep now. Nighty night! #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem #NaNoWriMo https://www.instagram.com/p/B4oRmJDghbe/?igshid=bzljbvkbayiw

The day I learned how to write I knew writing was something I wanted to do forever. And when I wrote my first short story in first grade, and saw all the smiles as people read it, I wanted become "someone who writes books!" Which I found out much later is called an "author." 🙂 --- When I was a teen, I had heard it would be a hard road yet I pushed on. I was determined to see my dream come alive no matter what. Now that I'm older, and still no best sellers, I often feel a bitterness. A strong desire not to write... yet here I am. Still writing because to stop literally hurts me. --- When you're passionate about something and you know God gave it to you, you cannot just simply walk away. Yes it will be hard. Yes you will want to quit. No, not everyone will be cheering for you nor will they be in your corner... But if GOD said it, then IT IS done. I believe it is this simple fact that drives me forward. If I quit, I'm calling God a liar. I'm telling Him that He made a mistake with me. --- And neither of those things are true. Not in the least. #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem #NaNoWriMo https://www.instagram.com/p/B4jOKIBgPFQ/?igshid=nad2q3mejs6w

I just keep reminding myself, "Regardless of how it feels or looks right now, God is still in control." --- He hasn't forgotten about you. He hasn't pushed you to the side and decided to get to you later. The Lord is still working and finishes what He starts. So hold your head up and walk in faith. #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem #NaNoWriMo https://www.instagram.com/p/B4gqdf_g9No/?igshid=czan1ipq5r68

Something I am constantly reminding myself is that regardless of what it looks like, how it feels right now, God is still in control. #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem #NaNoWriMo https://www.instagram.com/p/B4gpRHbADwU/?igshid=17siq1cwpy2xm

LATE again to #NaNoWriMo 😅 but better late than never, right? --- When you don't know your worth or when you feel worthless, you settle for things. You compromise. You tell yourself that being treated like an option, a trophy, another notch on someone's belt is okay. You convince yourself that you won't find someone who will treat you and love the you deserve, so being someone's scraps and leftovers is the best you'll ever be. --- I hear that old, familiar voice rise and echo these things in my head from time to time. But then I remember that no one should ever be handled that way. Not even me, regardless of how unlovable, undesirable I may feel. Always know and remember that you deserve better that. You deserve more than that. #JacquelineSimone #Poetry #Poem https://www.instagram.com/p/B4dsz22gWcQ/?igshid=1e12m1tmbs746

#snippet I'm thinking about titling it "Frenemy." --- These days it seems like every time I go to write, I'm crippled by the most ugliest thoughts, listlessness, resentment and anger... Honestly I've been thinking about stopping altogether. "What's the point in writing anymore? It's not like it's really doing anything for me..." --- All this week I've gotten reminder after reminder, all unexpectedly. Then I heard a wonderful message last night. The pastor talked about how we forget that blessings come with obedience. Also how we as believers tend to forget that we must go through, that life isn't a cakewalk. Essentially, expecting it to be easy just because you're saved is setting yourself up for failure and lots of disappointment. --- Whether you like it or not, trials WILL come. So you might as well press through and keep going. It's bigger than you--your story, your life is giving someone the strength to keep going right now. Never forget that. #Poem #Poetry #JacquelineSimoneSadberry https://www.instagram.com/p/B4FtqoLDMkl/?igshid=1ftijioffwvsn

#Snippet 10/17/19 #JacquelineSimoneSadberry #Poetry #Poem https://www.instagram.com/p/B3uOtRVA9_R/?igshid=zegniyrx06ds

People talk about building empires, but I rather build a legacy. I want to leave something behind for those coming up, something they can pick up and continue. Empires crumble in my opinion, but legacies go on forever. #Poetry #Poem #KanjiPoems #JacquelineSimoneSadberry https://www.instagram.com/jssberry_poetry/p/BwXdugdgdsx/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=83yrbsuhlx7v

Feeling like a ghost for most of your life is hard. All you ever want is for someone to notice you, to recognize that you exist--you're here. Sometimes I still tussle with that in my writing. Reading some old poems I wrote, I was reminded that the focus isn't supposed to be on me, but the One who gave me my gift in the first place. ----- Some days feel colder than others, but don't let that take you away from your true purpose. There is a reason you are here on this earth, doing what you've been given to do. Stay the course, stay focused. #Poetry #Poem #KanjiPoems #JacquelineSimoneSadberry https://www.instagram.com/jssberry_poetry/p/BwXdcu8gd9e/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=d4w6whvsitua

Ah... College. 😊 #Poetry #Poem #KanjiPoems #JacquelineSimoneSadberry https://www.instagram.com/jssberry_poetry/p/Bv2eEZ5gOkf/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1lj13zhij87vt