My side blog where I can fangirl in peace

Hello all,

I’ve made the difficult decision to orphan my works on AO3 and will be deleting my account there in a few days. I have also deleted my FFN account. I chose to orphan PGT and it associated works so that those who enjoyed the story as it was can still read it, but I will never come back to it. I am sorry to do this, but the Supergirl no longer holds any interest to me, and the story reminds me of a very painful time of my life. In a weeks time I will close this side account as well on tumblr. Those of you who know my main account are welcome to contact me on there. Please know this is what is best for me and my mental health to close that chapter of my life. I appreciate all of the readers and friends who supported me and my writing. 

I will always regret the lives I never lived and the stories that never got written. 

Yours,

So if enough time passes since the last time I read something I’ll forget the details of the story. It’s always fun to go back and reread old favorites. PGT is a trip because sometimes I forget that I wrote it. It’s been ages since I’ve reread it so I finally bit the bullet yesterday start from the beginning.

PGT hits a lot of my favorite tropes and interests. I basically wrote it for my own enjoyment. PGT was my first and so far only multi chapter work I’ve written. I enjoyed reading the story but rereading the comments always embarasses me. It was my first multi chapter fic and it had problems with tone and pacing, but I was so proud of it at the time. It took my ages to finish. I wrote it during one of the roughest patches of depression I’ve ever had. I was so proud of myself for actually finishing it.

It hurt me when the last chapter was met with mixed reviews. It was fair enough, a lot of people don’t enjoy emotional whiplash or imagine certain pay offs differently than what I wrote, which is fine. To me the ending was cathartic and the mild cliff hanger was supposed to keep me hyped for the sequel which would expand on a lot of the things that went unanswered in PGT. It took a lot of wind out of my sails when I realized that by writing to my own tastes it would alienate my readers. It upset me to let down the people who would comment and encourage me in every chapter.

Sometimes I think about going back to Bridges and finishing up the Black Mercy storyline, but I find it hard to grasp the Supergirl characters right now. I haven’t watched the show in ages and my interest in it has waned significantly. I keep telling myself that when I feel better and less depressed I’ll want to write more. But what I’ve come to realize is that I don’t think I’m going to be in that happy/content place any time soon. I hope one of these days inspiration will hit me and I can share more about my Kryptonian world building and finish the SuperX scandal pay off. Until then fans of the series have to wait.

Trigger Warning for Domestic Violence

Holy shit. I never would have guessed Melissa went through all of that. She’s very careful not to name names but it’s pretty clear she’s speaking about Bl@ke Jenner in her video. I’m glad a woman friend finally took her aside and asked her if she was okay. I’m glad she was able to escape that horrible situation. I’m very impressed with Melissa’s courage with coming forward and continuing to try to be a role model to others. That speaks to the strength of her character.

Hallo!

 Thank you for the kinds words friend. Unfortunately my desire to write Supergirl is low right now. I’ll admit I don’t even watch the show anymore. There’s a chance I could catch some inspiration at some point and finish the sequel. PGT was originally planned to be part of a series. If the interest is there I could post the plot lines for the series here to sate peoples curiosity. Just as it stands right now, I don’t see any updates in the near future. Sorry :c. 

-MfG