The Healer and The Killer

What I Liked

Let's start things off with the things that I really enjoyed about the finale.

Pomni.

Since the pilot, Pomni has easily been my favorite character. From the start of the show, we get to know both her strengths and her flaws. She's terrified of the place she ended up in, and tried leaving it when the option arose despite Ragatha desperately needing help. But it's those flaws that made her an interesting character, because it's the most realistic choice someone would make in that type of situation.

But those flaws doesn't stop her from her kindness and her trying to help. Despite her dislike of touch, she tried to take Ragatha's hand to help her, she went back for her after she was chased by Kaufmo, and after the pilot she went to Ragatha and thanked her for being there for her. One of Pomni's least talked about strengths is her kindness. She's kind to Gummi Goo, an NPC who's existence is only for an adventure and offers to bring him back to the circus. She's there to help Gangle when she was struggling with her mental health during episode four, even offering to close the restaurant when she saw how much it was visibly stressing her. Even from episode five to the finale, she let herself be an option for Jax to confide in whenever he felt comfortable, but never pushing him to do so, instead letting him go at his own pace.

One line from Pomni that stood out to me the most during the finale was: "I really wanted to help" through tears. That moment perfectly defines her character for me. She just wants to help. She will mess up, but she will try her hardest to help the others. Even when she figures out she's just a copy, she first goes to comfort Ragatha before processing it herself. All she wants to do is help.

When I came back from seeing the episode in theaters, one complaint I saw about Pomni was that she didn't check on Jax fast enough before he abstracted. I won't lie when I say that sentence affected me personally. I won't go into detail, but there were a few times where men have viewed me as someone to use to trauma dump onto without any prompt or warning (not even asking if I was in the right head space for it). It hit close to home when people said that, especially when Pomni was shown struggling with being both a copy, and feeling like she had failed everyone. Not just Jax.

Another statement I saw was that she checked on Jax in episodes prior. And that is partially true, but it's important to take note that she had only done that once in episode 7 when she needed his input in assisting 'Abel', and taking note of his avoidant behavior in episode 5 when he refused to talk to her about how he felt about a conversation in Ragatha while he was in the maid dress. So yes, we have seen Pomni be there for Jax, but we have also seen her give him space - tying back to what Kinger said in episode 6 "Giving someone space should never be the same as giving up on them."

It is not Pomni's job to be the sole comfort for everyone, including Jax, in order to avoid abstraction. She gave him space for him to come to her, but she also had her own problems to work out. This is more of a fandom issue I see with Pomni, with fans of other characters only seeing her as a glorified therapist and then getting upset when it's not part of her character. But that is only my opinion.

Ribbit's Story

Although this did take place during Jax's life at the circus, I will get to him and how he was treated both good and bad later. For now, I want to take a look one of the most anticipated character reveals since she was first mentioned. Ribbit.

For me, the flashback segment was just as much Ribbit's story as it was Jax's. It was really interesting to see how much we were able to learn about her in just one episode. Probably due to the build up and the hints of her relationship with Jax from the previous episodes, but even so it was paid off well here.

From subtext in the previous episodes, it was clear that Jax saw a lot of Ribbit in Pomni and had even grown closer to her because of that. And how they acted was very similar to how he and Ribbit acted in the past.

Like Pomni, Ribbit is strong headed and kind, but they are not a carbon copy of each other. Ribbit is a lot more energetic than Pomni - where as Pomni can be quite reserved with how she feels unless she was encouraged to open up - Ribbit thrives in being loud, getting others to have fun, and as Kaufmo said 'a bad influence' even if it was more so in a joking manner.

The episode also lets us dive into Ribbit's character, more so who they were before entering the circus. We learn that her parents were devote Mormons, eventually cutting ties from them due to their scrict and oppressive religion. But regardless, they still miss them after being trapped in the circus for so long.

In this scene, we also see her and Pomni having similarities when they listen to Jax opening up about his past. Promising not to tell anyone about it, respecting that he isn't ready to be that vulnerable with anyone else yet. We will get to that part of Jax later as this segment is focused on Ribbit.

After this, we see the fallout between Jax and Ribbit, caused by the former. But seeing Ribbit just so utterly confused after sharing such an emotionally intimate moment with Jax was just heartbreaking to see. Because we see just how close both of them were to each other, just for Jax to emotionally tear Ribbit down, gaslight and manipulate them about what happened, only for it to come to a crash when Ribbit inevitably abstracts. We all knew it was going to happen, but it hurts more to watch after spending all that time learning about who they were and what they meant to Jax.

It's what makes their character so tragic, knowing that her friendship with Jax was the cause of her downfall.

Speaking of:

Jax

I have many opinions about this rabbit. It's definite that Jax is one of the most complex characters in 'TADC'. And many people have their own loud opinions on him, both positive and negative. I can see points from each side but right now I want to focus on what the finale did well with his character.

In previous episodes, Jax has always shown avoidance whenever the topic of anything related to his past or information about him is brought up. In episode 3 he doesn't share what happens when he holds his breathe, in episode 5 he lies about his backstory (reciting the plot of 'Breaking Bad' instead) and in episode 6 he visibly becomes on edge when Pomni notes that she's learning more about him. And in the final episode, everything about him is finally put on display. As hinted in previous episodes, we knew that he had a special relationship with Ribbit, but we also learn what happened to him before he joined the circus.

His parents were both awful to him, which lead to his own toxic view on masculinity. His father constantly belittled and berated him about what type of man he should be, then eventually leaving him and his mother - which leads to things becoming worse. His mother was verbally abusive towards her son, constantly projecting her hatred of his father onto him, including his views of 'being a man' as well. It all came crashing down when Jax told her something vulnerable about himself, causing her to laugh cruelly at him but then hugging him. Which lead to him pushing her off him in fear and and confusion, accidentally injuring her.

Afraid of what was going to happen, he ran away from home, in return becoming homeless until he arrived at the circus - where he became friends with Ribbit and Kaufmo.

Now to the first scene that's most talked about. Yes, I do believe that the scene was Jax opening up to Ribbit about being transfem.

(I wrote this next part before Goose confirmed that Jax is transfem who uses she/he pronouns but I wanted to add this as this was how I viewed it when first watching the episode in theaters.)

And I also believe it was Jax being genderfluid, and trans masc, and queer, and a man being vulnerable after believing that manhood was achieved by toxic masculinity. With Jax, there is a huge umbrella of many things that people can relate to that it can't be narrowed down to one thing solely. He/she/they to me are a trans symbol for anyone who has shared or related to the trans and queer experience that I feel it doesn't just narrow it down to one thing.

Jax isn't a 'bad person' for the sake of being bad. He's a human who has gone through trauma and uses it to lash out. And is what makes her an interesting character, even if the narrative in episode 9 is flawed in portraying it. Which I will go into later.

The second most talked about scene, Jax abstracting. This was foreshadowed since episode 6 when we saw him having a panic attack in the bathroom, to him nearly abstracting in his bedroom in episode 7, and him trying to go back to his room at the beginning of episode 8 before Zooble called them back. Is it sad, yes. But was I expecting it? Also yes.

However,

An Open Ending

It doesn't stop them from adding hope to his story. When they create the tent for him, as well as the aquarium for her and the other abstractions. They don't have to suffer when the worst has happened. They are allowed to heal, because life doesn't end when the worst happens. You're able to keep going, to grow, to help others when they accept that chance.

This section is a bit smaller but I think it's worth nothing with the implications of how the abstractions will be treated now that they're no longer in the cellar. It reminded me of Goose's original message for the show 'there's meaning to be found in a stagnant life'. Life hadn't ended for the abstractions.

It is highly implied that it's possible for the abstractions to heal. Not confirmed, but I feel like that's the best case scenario. They will find the meanings to their lives again.

It also gives fans idea of what types of activities the characters will have now that Caine is part of their group. How they will adapt to their new lives, no longer constricted by the past and being able to move forward with chances they never got to have before. That creativity will never go away even if the show is over.

What I Didn't Like

I've been worrying about describing what I didn't like about the finale due to all the overlapping opinions on social media and not wanting to put down other people who enjoyed these aspects. But the more I talked about these issues with friends and my partner, who have reassured me about it, the more I'm wanting to talk about them as both a viewer of the show and as a writer.

Brain Scans

First of all, I was not a fan of the brain scan theory becoming canon. Although I knew where people were coming from with this theory, I really didn't want it to happen as for me it went against the message of the show. That if the characters were only copies, then all the development they've realized about themselves doesn't feel like it matters if they're only brain scans all along.

And unfortunately, that theory became real. And there was no build up to the reveal, just Kinger revealing it right away without letting any of the other characters get a chance to process or talk about it. I hate saying this, but the characters being copies just makes them feel so hollow. That all we learned about them in the bar scene in episode 5 doesn't matter if they don't have lives to go back to.

How is there "meaning to be found in a stagnant life" if it's not truly them learning those lessons from the circus and being able to rediscover those meaning to their lives when they're finally able to leave? And the true real life versions of themselves get to discover that off screen?

It just felt poorly handled when them possibly being real people was one of the most interesting parts of the show.

Jax

For me, I was not a fan of how Jax being transfem was handled. This was something I was worried to discuss as, even though I'm non-binary, I am not a trans woman and therefore I don't have the same experience that trans people have gone through, so I wasn't really sure how much I was able to say about this. But after talking with other trans fans (and others who fall under that umbrella) of the show, including friends and my partner, I'm glad that I'm not the only one who felt like this.

Jax represents one of the most harmful stereotypes that are placed on trans women, she attacks and bullies all the cis women in the circus due to being insecure about her own gender identity and internalized misogyny. Like I said, I don't speak for all trans women. But when the character that is supposed to be transfem's biggest trait is that she only harms other women and is violent towards them, before making her abstract without facing the consequences of her bullying and DRIVING RIBBIT TO ABSTRACTION, it puts an extremely sour taste in my mouth.

Not only that, but the maid dress Jax moment in the show and the merch feels a lot more icky upon realising that it was implied that Jax wearing that dress was her experiencing gender dysphoria. And what does the show do? It makes fun of Jax being uncomfortable and then makes merch out of that dysphoria.

Not to mention how fetishised the concept of maid dresses are, along with adding with how fetishised trans women are. Putting them together just feels a lot gross after the reveal of Jax being trans.

It was funny when it was originally thought that the maid dress was used to make fun of toxic masculinity and Jax's fragile ego as those are behaviors that should be condemned. But now that it's revealed to be gender dysphoria, it feels a lot more uncomfortable to rewatch.

I am not saying that trans stories have to be perfect. I understand that the trans experience is extremely nuanced and many trans people have their stories to tell. But never once does the narrative actually call out Jax's behaviors and actions for how she treated the others for his own insecurities. Especially when we learn that he indirectly caused Ribbit's abstraction after Ribbit let her confide in them.

That aspect of Jax's backstory is what made me lose all sympathy for her completely as a character. Do I feel bad for how his mother treated him? Yes, and I don't fully blame him for running away as I know many friends with parents like Jax's who have done awful things to their victims. But all that sympathy goes out of the window the moment we see how Jax treats Ribbit, Ragatha and Kaufmo.

Jax is directly responsible for both Ribbit and Kaufmo abstracting, and forces Ragatha not to talk about her own friend's death. That alone goes against the sympathy that the narrative wants us to have for her. Because you can have sympathetic characters that are awful people, Bojack Horseman is a great example. He is a truly despiciable character that the audience sympathizes with, but never once does the show excuse his actions or what he's done to other people. But with Jax, the story wants us to excuse her actions rather than have her face consequences. And no, abstraction is not a consequence. A fort was created for Jax, and she is able to heal in the aquarium with the others. So how can I feel sympathy for a character that is responsible for hurting and destroying others when the narrative wants me to do so.

I liked the scene when she was vulnerable with Ribbit, because it was a scene for many people to relate to. But even so, it doesn't help the flawed story telling leading up to it. And that Jax being trans was only focused in episode 9, rather than having it being explored in the rest of the show.

I understand Goose posted hints about it on tumblr way back before the pilot. But if fans have to look for clues about a character on social media, rather than have it explored in the show, then that is a flaw in the writing. When was the last time you had to look for a creator's social media for confirmations about a show?

And it doesn't help that Jax is the one who takes up the most screen time when it could have gone to helping develop the plot points set up in the other episodes, such as Scratch, C&A, the blue AI etc. Instead, it was all answered on tumblr. Which is honestly disappointing.

Caine

This will probably be a hot take, but Caine should not have been redeemed as quickly as he was. Do I think him being redeemed was a bad choice? Of course not. But him realizing he messed up right away didn't feel earned. Especially after he spent the last episode torturing the entire cast with both the adventures and with their worst memories and insecurities.

Throughout the show, Caine was always shown to be a stubborn force. He couldn't handle that Zooble didn't want to go on his adventures, refusing to accept that he is the problem. He doesn't continue to create the suggestion box adventures, even if it made everyone else happy, because it hurt his ego. He created an entire 'escape the circus' adventure to convince and gaslight himself that the others don't want to leave. And it's confirmed that he can mess with people's minds, with Goose saying on tumblr that he tried to alter Scratch's mind yet accidently caused him to abstract.

That is what makes him an interesting character, but it falls flat when he suddenly realizes that he messed up the moment he got deleted. After an entire show and backstory that shows how much he can't handle rejection, it feels too rushed for him to immediately realize that he is the one in the wrong.

And the others forgave him too quickly too, especially after being lied to and tortured in the last two episodes. Caine needed more time to process his faults and insecurities, as well as have the others struggle to believe him when he said he's changed.

Both Jax and Caine struggle with similar problems, both being characters too stubborn to change. However, both of them have flawed writing that rushes their character arcs. Jax with being trans, and Caine with being redeemed.

Pomni

One thing I noticed while writing this review is how little we are given regarding to the female presenting characters. With the male presenting characters, Jax, Caine and even Kinger, we are given big character moments for them. Kinger is used to explain how the circus works and knows how to stop Caine. Jax is given over half of episode 9 to focus on their backstory. And both Jax and Caine are quickly sympathized and forgiven by the narrative.

Yet for the female presenting characters? Zooble's gender identity crisis had to be shared with Kinger instead of their own episode, and even then Kinger got more focus with his past and his wife. Ragatha mentions how her mother was emotionally abusive, yet her suffering is continued to be used as a comedic tool for Jax.

However I will say, Gangle is given an entire episode exploring her mental health and is arguably one of the best episodes in the show. But it's a shame because we don't get to have that with the other characters, and Jax's constant bullying of her is only called out by Zooble. But even then, him bullying her is not treated like a big deal by the others.

And then there's Pomni. I have already sung my praises about Pomni, but now I want to go into the stuff that really made me upset as a fan of her character.

She is the main character of her show, yet we barely touch her backstory before she got into the circus. We know that Pomni is kind and stands up for herself, but even with her strongest traits we barely get to know anything else about her. The most we are given from her backstory is that she was an accountant and liked exploring abandoned buildings. That's it.

At least with the others we get to see how their pasts affected them. With Gangle dropping out of college and struggling with her mental health in her job, Zooble's avatar representing their identity crisis outside of the circus, Kinger's guilt over losing his wife caused him to spiral, Ragatha's mother and her emotional abuse being the reason she deflects and fawns, and Jax's mother rejecting him leading her to lash out at anyone who dares to come close to her.

But with Pomni, who is supposed to be the main character, we don't know why she is the way she is. In the pilot we're shown that she has anxiety and frightened, but still kind and brave. Even reaching out to Ragatha when Kaufmo attacks her despite her disliking touch. But after that, she mellows out.

We could have had an explanation about why she trusts and befriends Jax easily, despite what he put the others through. We could have seen how her anxiety affects her throughout the show. We could have even been given more scenes of her anger issues, something that she might have struggled with back in the real world. We could have even seen why she likes to explore abandoned buildings despite being afraid of horror. But all of that is mellowed out just so she can serve as the audience's camera. And now interesting stuff about her, like her having survivor's guilt, is not only being confirmed after the show ending but on tumblr instead of in the show.

I'm not saying that a character needs to have a traumatic backstory to be interesting. But a character does need to be fleshed out, explored, and given reasons to why they are the way they are instead of the creator saying 'just because'. That isn't good writing.

Plot Points Being Dropped

One thing I don't understand was why this show was hinted to have lore, if Goose never intended to explore it. In the first episode we are immediately shown that Caine is hiding something after Pomni mentions an exit, and the C&A sign shown when she's running through the office. Why introduce that if Goose would later say that the show would be character driven and that there's no deep lore.

There is nothing wrong with a character driven show, what makes TADC a good watch in the first place is about of the characters. But you can't set up Chekhov's gun if it's not going to be set off later down the line. You can't set up C&A and confirm Caine is the reason it shut down in tumblr asks, without exploring how Caine was the reason it shut down. You can't set up Caine is hiding something, and never reveal what he's hiding. You can't set up the religious symbolism of C&A with Caine being named after 'Cane' from the bible and then only write that and the blue AI off as 'fluff' that wasn't important.

You can have a character driven show AND explore those plot points. In fact, exploring both and integrating it with the characters would have made the show more interesting.

Even then, the show fails to be character driven when only the male presenting characters are given the most focus while the female characters only exist as a plot device for Jax's story.

If the show was going to be character driven, why add those plot points at all?

For example. Imagine if Gravity Falls set up the three journals and built it up during the first season, but when season 2 comes around it's focused on why Robbie became such an awful person and tries to make you sympathize for him bullying Dipper and the finale was focused on him while Alex Hirsch confirmed everything about the journals, the portal, and Bill Cipher on twitter and said all that lore was 'fluff'. Do you understand why people might be upset?

Conclusion

This episode should have been a second season.

I understand why Goose wants to distance herself from the show, and for good reason, I am only saying this as a hypothetical. I don't know why Glitch didn't give her more episodes after they claimed to support the creator's vision, but nonetheless I still want to give this statement.

Episode 8 should have been the end of the first season, and episode 9 should have been the first episode of a hypothetical season 2. That way, there could be an episode of Jax's story without taking up screen time for everyone else. Caine could get a redemption and realization that wasn't rushed. Pomni could be explored more, both with her backstory and present self. And the plot points could have had more time to be explained and explored.

However I know that isn't going to happen, the show is over and I can't do anything about it. That's fine.

And even though the ending wasn't what I thought it would be, I still love this show. I loved writing fanfiction for it, I loved that it inspired me to start drawing, I love that it led me to becoming a voice actor, and I love the people I met through this show.