a much more fiendish buffet value!

Interpreted this initially not as shelves, but as your cat having erected defensive fortifications

Until death, all defeat is psychological.

Being a flop changed my life. The world is not my oyster, I am glowing. I walked into a pole this morning. There's very little I wouldn't do for $1,000

How about Other people start worrying about how I perceive them

Middle aged women who aren’t very well versed in social media post with a sort of instinctive savant hilariousness that reminds me of the poetry of children who haven’t learned what good poetry sounds like yet

nabokov killing a grey alien with a shovel: I awoke unremarkably to find my mother's favorite birdbath in the process of molestation by the grey nubs of some fat fingered and bug eyed hominid of vulcanized complexion. Being at the end of my wits and the begining of an experimental streak, I angrily shod and the fetched the heavy steel shovel from the garage. There was an exchange of swears and brandished gardening tools and extraterrestrial gibbering, at which point I -with all the vigor I could muster- beat the horny little hominid into a grey and yogurtish pulp

David Foster Wallace killing a grey alien with a shovel: David awoke in the same bleary unremarkable haze that marks the beginning to all of his mornings. Despite the ostensible unremarkability of the morning, David found that the birdbath, located in his front yard, was on the receiving end of romantic advances from some bug eyed and grey skinned little freak of an extraterrestrial. David hated dealing with this sort of thing. It reminded him of his father. It was only after fumbling for some discarded gaudy tennis shoes and a clean untended steel shovel, that David felt properly equipped to tackle the challenge at hand. "You effete little cocksucker!" he bellowed. "get a load of this!" The muted clang of the shovel was not unsatisfying to David. The sensation, not unlike cutting into a overripe melon, or batting a woodrotted tree stump. He took this as license to continue twisting his body, angling it for proper leverage and angle, to maximize the force of swung cold steel against definitely feminine rubbery dermis.